Update on my wife 3-31-21

**GoodOlBoy** · 03-31-2021, 04:11 AM

She's in good spirits, me not so much, but I think I hide it pretty well (at least when I lie to myself about it I do). Five doctors offices, four clinics, and two hospitals can't even get it together on who has the hot-potato, and due to a hospital take over and then bankruptcy a few years ago they don't even show the Dr who did her original biopsy, much LESS the results. Seriously, "We don't show that Dr was ever here, nor that you were a patient..." Then a second call back "Ok, so people remember that Doctor, but we still don't show him, nor you." Now she and my Aunt are combing through bills and lab results from both of our cancer bouts trying to piece together records for the new new new Dr who is going to be seeing her. Otherwise they have to start from scratching including a new biopsy! The newest Doctor (oncologist) has her an initial appointment for this coming Tuesday, but without that paperwork it is literally going to be "referral to a cutter" time! If I had hair, I would have pulled it out. She tells me "It's ok, stay calm, we are taking care of it, I'm going to be fine." I'm grinding my teeth; flip-flopping between depression, rage, and panic attacks; and praying! All of this bearing in mind that I'm not allowed by my family to go to her appointments because my social anxiety and panic attacks make me a problem for everybody involved. Last time I went I had a panic attack so bad I was a few points of bp on top and bottom from being hospitalized, and my heart-rate was just shy of a hummingbirds. I had to be taken down to the ER; where they learned yet again that I am "drug resistant"; because I was on the verge of a panic induced heart attack.

So... That's where we are... She's sleeping now. Me? Not so much...

God Bless

Richard

**Thundarstick** · 03-31-2021, 04:59 AM

Lord, please help Richard put things in your hands that he has no control over. God, give him peace, with understanding and acceptance that you are in control of all things. Amen

**rick benjamin** · 03-31-2021, 05:56 AM

God is known by many names, one of them is El Shaddai means "All Sufficient" May he meet all your needs both physical and emotional.

**Pine Baron** · 03-31-2021, 06:21 AM

Richard, Place your trust in the Lord. I'm praying for Heather, that God is leading her down His path to healing. I'm praying that you come to Him for peace and understanding. All things are for the Glory of God. Go in peace.

**Wayne Smith** · 03-31-2021, 07:43 AM

Panic is a physiological (physical) response to a psychological stimulus. You can't stop the panic once it begins, you can begin to identify those stimuli that put you into one, and you have at least started that. Absolute faith in God is not easy, we all try to do it ourselves and only rely on God when we can't - and that leaves us relying on ourselves in most situations and only thinking of God when we panic. At that point the physiology takes over and we are truly helpless.

Relying on God means making a conscious effort to rely on God when I don't have to! Until I can routinely rely on Him I won't rely on Him when I need to. Beginning a discipline of relying on God for the routine things and to turn over the rest that do not bring panic becomes the basis of relaxing and allowing God to work when I can't. Having seen God take something and make it much better than I would have, or could have, gives me the ability to trust Him when I can do nothing. It is never too late to start.

**square butte** · 03-31-2021, 08:30 AM

Heavenly Father - Please let Richard and his Wife know Your presence and know that they are in Your Hands

**William Yanda** · 03-31-2021, 08:32 AM

Originally Posted by square butte

Heavenly Father - Please let Richard and his Wife know Your presence and know that they are in Your Hands

Amen, and Lord, use these circumstances to bring glory to Yourself.

**dverna** · 03-31-2021, 08:33 AM

Originally Posted by Wayne Smith

Panic is a physiological (physical) response to a psychological stimulus. You can't stop the panic once it begins, you can begin to identify those stimuli that put you into one, and you have at least started that. Absolute faith in God is not easy, we all try to do it ourselves and only rely on God when we can't - and that leaves us relying on ourselves in most situations and only thinking of God when we panic. At that point the physiology takes over and we are truly helpless.

Relying on God means making a conscious effort to rely on God when I don't have to! Until I can routinely rely on Him I won't rely on Him when I need to. Beginning a discipline of relying on God for the routine things and to turn over the rest that do not bring panic becomes the basis of relaxing and allowing God to work when I can't. Having seen God take something and make it much better than I would have, or could have, gives me the ability to trust Him when I can do nothing. It is never too late to start.

Very good post Wayne. Applies to me and likely to many.

**USMC87** · 03-31-2021, 08:46 AM

Heavenly Father we come today asking You to provide for Richards wife and his family, We ask that You give Richard peace and comfort to over come his own issues as he is in need to support his wife. We ask You to guide the Doctors and all who take care of the situation, We pray that You receive all honor and glory from all things. Amen.

**Boaz** · 03-31-2021, 11:45 AM

Lord be near Richard and Heather in their trouble . Provide a way Lord , help them open doors to solutions . Please give healing to both and peace of mind that you are with them . Thank you for all you do in their lives . Amen

**BeeMan** · 04-01-2021, 08:23 AM

Originally Posted by Wayne Smith

Panic is a physiological (physical) response to a psychological stimulus. You can't stop the panic once it begins, you can begin to identify those stimuli that put you into one, and you have at least started that. Absolute faith in God is not easy, we all try to do it ourselves and only rely on God when we can't - and that leaves us relying on ourselves in most situations and only thinking of God when we panic. At that point the physiology takes over and we are truly helpless.

Relying on God means making a conscious effort to rely on God when I don't have to! Until I can routinely rely on Him I won't rely on Him when I need to. Beginning a discipline of relying on God for the routine things and to turn over the rest that do not bring panic becomes the basis of relaxing and allowing God to work when I can't. Having seen God take something and make it much better than I would have, or could have, gives me the ability to trust Him when I can do nothing. It is never too late to start.

Great post, thank you.

**John Wayne** · 04-01-2021, 08:35 AM

Hang in there Richard, we're all praying for you and your wife!

**Triggerfinger** · 04-01-2021, 08:42 AM

Prayers sent!

**jcren** · 04-01-2021, 09:50 AM

Prayers sent

**Three44s** · 04-01-2021, 10:20 AM

Prayers sent!

Three44s

**WRideout** · 04-04-2021, 10:11 AM

Prayer sent for peace and acceptance.

Wayne

**GoodOlBoy** · 04-04-2021, 11:52 PM

Thanks much everybody. She and my Aunt were able to find what we think she needs to have in a pile of records, so good Lord willin' Tuesday will go well. We'll see. I'll post an update when we know it.

Thanks for the thoughts, prayers, and words.

God Bless

Richard

**Pine Baron** · 04-05-2021, 07:06 AM

Thank you for the update. That is good news. Prayers continue.

**Cargo** · 04-05-2021, 07:54 AM

Prayers sent brother and we'll keep'em coming.

**Boaz** · 04-05-2021, 09:52 AM

Glad to hear it ! Hoping they get a plan together quickly . Please keep us aware Richard .

BP	Bronze Point	IMR	Improved Military Rifle	PTD	Pointed
BR	Bench Rest	M	Magnum	RN	Round Nose
BT	Boat Tail	PL	Power-Lokt	SP	Soft Point
C	Compressed Charge	PR	Primer	SPCL	Soft Point "Core-Lokt"
HP	Hollow Point	PSPCL	Pointed Soft Point "Core Lokt"	C.O.L.	Cartridge Overall Length
PSP	Pointed Soft Point	Spz	Spitzer Point	SBT	Spitzer Boat Tail
LRN	Lead Round Nose	LWC	Lead Wad Cutter	LSWC	Lead Semi Wad Cutter
GC	Gas Check

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Update on my wife 3-31-21

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