I'm no sure about approaching this yet....

[WallyM3]

....but is this the area in which to post personal stuff?

[Tom W.]

If you go by the forum rules..but you may want to check the "off topic" area...

[WallyM3]

To wit, Tom?

[Tom W.]

Don't get the moderators P.O'd....

[EOD3]

Unless it has something to do with a blowup doll or a Saint Bernard the Mods can be pretty forgiving. .02 YMMV

[Buckshot]

.............We're pretty easy going and generally don't move a thread unless it's badly out of place. If it's something about you, or your family or similar then yes, please feel free to post it here.

..................Buckshot

[WallyM3]

And, "Send picture of boat"?

Naw, nuthin' like that.

[OutHuntn84]

[QUOTE]SWM seekin Girls that like fishing & hunting, can field dress game & cook like Rachal Ray?

Must have their own pickup truck, boat & float plane and bank account like Athina Onassis Rousse, lMust like Sharing, long walks in the woods hunting dogs and beer.?[QUOTE]

So where might a fella post such an advertisment???? :p

[Changeling]

Try underneath your pillow before you go to bed. If it works please send PM ASAP.

[Tom W.]

Just rub the brass lamp hard three times and wait for the genie to appear....

[EOD3]

[QUOTE]SWM seekin Girls that like fishing & hunting, can field dress game & cook like Rachal Ray?

Must have their own pickup truck, boat & float plane and bank account like Athina Onassis Rousse, lMust like Sharing, long walks in the woods hunting dogs and beer.?


So where might a fella post such an advertisment???? :p

All prayers belong in the religion forum :razz:

[Tom W.]

Isn't it more akin to fantasy?

[frankenfab]

Unless it has something to do with a blowup doll or a Saint Bernard the Mods can be pretty forgiving. .02 YMMV

But what if it is about a blowup doll AND a Saint Bernard?

[WallyM3]

No, it's an abiding sadness.

The kind of thing that makes you feel like someone is sitting on your chest.

Maybe it's a bit too out of place.

[sagacious]

What's that saying about asking permission? Wally, post what you wish to say, and let the mods decide if it necessitates a change of forum. That's what they're here for. No harm, no foul.

[frankenfab]

I was just thinking that I/we may have been being callous about a serious issue. I apologize for that, had a rough week, just getting to finally relax a bit....

[WallyM3]

I have been wrestling with the appropriateness or desirability of posting such a thing on an internet Forum. But these places are now an embedded part of our society and lives, so perhaps my inclination is not so perverse.

This particular place seems such a tightly woven group, of which I am a relatively recent member, that I felt at ease entertaining the notion of off-loading some of the weight.

On the other hand, is it fair to burden others with the implicit responsibility of reciprocating with appropriate responses? It can, after all, be so tiresome to others who have their own troubles and a burden launched without due consideration for its consequences.

But, I've already opened the door, I suppose, and it would be, now, deceitful not to come clean.

I trust in the Moderators to clean up after me if the need be.

My wife is ill, in fact terminally. She has beat back Leukemia twice before, once in her 30s, and most recently 5 years ago at age 44. (I'm 58, by the way.) This time, there is no reasonable chance of any therapy working to preserve life.

(end of message space)

I just ran out of energy. I'll continue tomorrow if this thread scoures.

I may well be off base. Apologies if this is the case.

[Beerd]

I
I may well be off base.

I don't think so.
..

[Heavy lead]

No apologies necessary, it's what friends are for, long distance or other wise. I for one am so sorry and while not a mod or anybody else of any importance, I'm sure you have all our blessings to let it all out. Prayers sent even if not asked for.

[WallyM3]

My temerity stems from my high regard for the membership here and the unusually pleasant and genuine contacts I've had with members.

Still....

I leave it to the good judgment of the moderators whether or not this thread should continue.

[Pepe Ray]

Wally;
I, too. wrestled in a match such as yours. Leukemia was the villain there as well.
The fact that she and I had accepted Jesus in our lives many years before helped us,without a doubt. Otherwise my grief would have destroyed me. It nearly did anyway.
I found that the platitudes and offered sympathy were a superficial balm.
Hopefully you two have made a life together that is worth salvaging the remnants of. Taking up the pieces and moving on.
My Alice said on 3 occasions in her last 3 weeks, " This will be a blessing for someone." It tore me up to hear it but the words left me with an agenda. To let her spirit help me make a "blessing for someone".

I pray that you will accept His will, whatever it may be.

Pepe Ray

[waksupi]

Wally, no problem posting this here. If you want it moved elsewhere later, just let someone on the staff know.
Best wishes to you and your wife.

[9.3X62AL]

Most certainly appropriate, Wally. God be with you and yours at this time of need.

[sagacious]

Can one possibly share in a harder, more stressful battle, than a fight to combat the severe illness of a beloved partner or family member? My mind hasn't the reserve to imagine anything more difficult. But the fact that the struggle is shared, and that you are there to carry as much of the weight as is humanly possible is of no little significance, and is unquestionably of immense relief to your wife.

I wish I knew the right words to buoy your spirits. I hope very much that tomorrow is a good and peaceful day for your wife, and not a hard day, and that every day after is likewise a good day. My thoughts are with you both.

[fishhawk]

words.......things we use to talk to each other, try to express our feelings about life and other things. but some times words can't really convey what we feel. just know Wally we do know. steve k

[Three-Fifty-Seven]

Wally,

I'm so sorry to hear this.

If there is anything I (or anybody) can do please let us know, we are not mind readers, I wish I were closer, I use to live up the road in Springfield, VT for the first 41 years of my life!

Look for little things to rejoice in, they really are big! Enjoy the days you do have with your beloved wife, now is the time to make memories.

To bad most of us forget, or put the idea away that someday, we will be loosing a loved one, and that we wished we had spend more time with them.

I've had a few close calls which left me knocking on deaths door, makes me realize how frail our lives really are, no guarantee even for the rest of today for any of us.

And yes I do find comfort through trusting in Jesus as my saviour, that I will again see my beloved family members.

[theperfessor]

Wally, this forum SAYS it's about Cast Bullets, but the more I hang out here the more I realize it's about the PEOPLE who share and enjoy the cast bullet hobby in various ways. And people here have shared their joys and sorrows, their ups and downs, many times. We're a community, and we stick by each other when needed.

Please feel free to share your burden here. Just having an outlet to voice your feelings may help both of you to deal with this.

[blackthorn]

There are no words to adequately express our empathy with you in this darkest of hours! From our house to yours, you are in our prayers and may God be with you in your time of need.

[WallyM3]

The perfessor has put his finger squarely on why I felt I could post this here, on this Forum, if anywhere. I feel better for doing so and for the great level of tolerance shown me.

Thank you all for your replies.

[thx997303]

Tolerate nothin. We aren't "tolerating" you. You are a friend in need.

To merely tolerate a friend in need is no better than ignoring him completely.

Wally, there's nothing to tolerate.

A little while back my wife left me for a month. It was heartbreaking.

I posted about my issues here and the advice and support was a great thing.

Wally, you are going through something much worse than I can imagine, and I wish something I could say would make it better.

I feel for you brother. I hope you and your wife can enjoy every minute you have together.

[WallyM3]

thx, I do know what you mean. Just my mental Thesaurus is balky sometimes.

[Tom W.]

And please excuse me if I appear a bit flippant. I in no way would post cruel remarks about a situation such as yours. My wife is also in bad physical health, altho her cancer hasn't shown up in 14 years.

Sometimes a guy just has to share the burden, catch a fresh breath, and be sure who your Savior is...

[WallyM3]

Not at all, Tom. No worries, as they say "down under".

And I pray that she remains well.

[Recluse]

This particular place seems such a tightly woven group, of which I am a relatively recent member, that I felt at ease entertaining the notion of off-loading some of the weight.

My wife is ill, in fact terminally. She has beat back Leukemia twice before, once in her 30s, and most recently 5 years ago at age 44. (I'm 58, by the way.) This time, there is no reasonable chance of any therapy working to preserve life.

I may well be off base. Apologies if this is the case.

You're not off base as this IS a tightly woven group--and we take care of our own.

Very much hate hearing this kind of news. I fly a number of leukemia patients to and from treatment centers. Some are terminal but have decided to fight a while longer as they feel they're not quite ready to leave just yet. Others are ready and we're just making things more comfortable and qualitative for the precious time they have left.

I have no answers for you, only prayers.

:coffee:

P.S. One other thing, Wally. We have a number of Cast Boolits members not all that far from where you and your wife reside. We've been known to jump in a car or truck and travel to be with our fellow members when the need called for us to do so.

Many of us are married and our wives can provide wonderful support--wives understand each other in ways us husbands will never be able to. That's the way God made it. He made us to be sociable so that we could celebrate our joys with each other as well as share our burdens so that we can all pitch in and take a few pounds so that you do not have to carry it all by yourself.

[WallyM3]

Thank you, recluse. This is her third time around. She's tired.

[square butte]

Wally, Prayers from another Vermonter.

[rockrat]

Wally, Prayers from a once neighbor to the East of you (NH)

[gray wolf]

I wish I could say this in person -- I can't so the key strokes will have to say it for Julie and I.
Our prayers are with you and you wife.
I in my own mind can't possibly truly know how you feel, I can only imagine the sadness.
Please stay with us in your time of need, we are here for you in what ever capacity you see fit.
You put your name on the dotted line and joined cast bullets, that makes you part of the family here. If you ever find yourself needing to talk to someone--just PM me and I will give you the phone # ANY TIME.

Sam---in Maine

[kbstenberg]

Walley All i can say is what everyone else has been saying. If there is anything I personally could do for you don't hesitate to PM me.
Please for my prayers what is your wifes name?
Kevin

[Blammer]

The only consolation and guidance I can provide would be a prayer from me to Him for you.

[Char-Gar]

Wally.. You and you wife have a tough row to how for sure and for certain. YOu will receive support the folks on this board.

That said, an Internet community is a very poor substutute for family, friends and church in times like these. Folks that can look us in the eye, put their arms around our shoulders, and hold our hands in prayer are far more valuable that us poor guys who can only read words on screens and reply with more words on screens.

Words on screens run a distance second to real folks in your life.

[pmeisel]

May God bless you both in these difficult times, and may he lighten her burden and spirit....

[whisler]

All I can say is ..PRAYERS. And I have. May God be with you both.

[WallyM3]

Bless you all.

I must say, however, that we knew this was coming some day, we just didn't expect it this soon. So be it, and that's really become our attitude.

There is humor in everything.

When she can't eat and tosses up what she does, I tell her that she's a mess. And then she reminds me, "Yes, but I'm your mess." And there is similar banter. We are, first and foremost, good friends.

These have been the best years of both of our lives. Not one regret, not one fight, and not one narcissistic moment. Some sadness, but always secure.

I'm just going to go fishin' and shooting "after". Because, how do you follow an act like that?

[Ben]

Your remark of I just ran out of energy seems to say a lot about your current feelings and situation.

Sounds like you and your wife have fought the " Good Fight ".

The fact that this has and is wearing you down, makes you just as human as the rest of us on planet earth.

There is just so much that a human can give ( and stand over an extended period of extreme hardship ) and when you look down into what you have left to give and it is empty, it is just that,....EMPTY.

Put any of us in your situation and a large % of us most likely would not fair as well as you have.

Many people in a situation like this would say to you.... " Gee, I know how you must feel."

The real truth is until we've walked in your shoes , day after day, after day.....we have no idea at all what you and your wife have and are currently going through !

I will offer this.....Very few of the severe storms of life are not eventually followed by blue sky.

I've never felt it was important to have thousands of friends, but one or two friends that will stick with you come " Hell or High Water" is so very important. Sounds like that was exactly the kind of relationship that the two of you had and continue to have today. Think often about all the good times, and be thankful for the good times, they will help you through these very tough times...........

We will pray for you and your wife ! !

Best,

Ben

[WallyM3]

Thanks, Ben.

I do think that it takes one a moment to "suck it up".

We're both doing better now.

Though I have the easier row to hoe.

[MT Gianni]

Both of you probably feel that you have the easier "row to hoe". Share feelings and remembrances but most of all continue to be there for her, The worls will be here when you are ready for it. God Bless you both, Gianni.

[WallyM3]

I think you are so right.

[lead-1]

Prayers sent and hang tough. There is a lot of understanding folks here to chat with when you need it..

[UweJ]

Prayers sent for both of you. Stay on the positive side,only that will get you through.I know.
God bless
Uwe

[ricksplace]

Prayers from here too. God bless.

[WallyM3]

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and words.

Caroline has taken a real nose-dive and has trouble walking with help. The pain is so great that I fear an IV is called for.

I have stolen a few visits to the Forum here and there, but less and less as her needs increase.

Just wanted to explain.