Found out my great-grandfather was a psychopath.

[Idaho45guy]

Anyone else have a relative in the family tree above you that is truly awful?

Was talking to my mom about ideas for my next novel, and she said I should base it on my great-grandfather. My last novel was a murder mystery about a serial killer in Idaho. Why would I base the next one on my great-grandfather??

She explained to me about how he was infamous for being hot-tempered, violent, and cruel. His 2nd wife died under suspicious circumstances when she fell from his Model T Ford shortly after she revealed that she was pregnant. He hated children and didn't want any more, which is why he left my great-grandmother and married a younger woman who was supposedly barren.

But, surprisingly, she became pregnant and within a month, fell from the moving vehicle for an unknown reason at 35 mph and lingered a few days in a coma, then died.

My mom revealed all this to me, thinking it would inspire me to write my next novel.

No. It did not. It was awful to find out that I am descended from such an evil and selfish SOB. His son, my grandfather, was a notorious drunk and horse trainer who cheated on my grandmother multiple times. He died before I was born. My grandmother died when I was 4 years old, and physically abused my mother and was a cold and hardened woman.

My dad's side of the family is not much better. No murders that I'm aware of, but certainly dysfunctional with lots of emotional abuse.

Anyone else discover that their ancestors were just awful?

[BJK]

Just a tip, as long as you turned out OK, don't dwell on what others did. It doesn't reflect on you unless you allow it to. I would just profess to myself to never be like them.

[memtb]

Yes, several! But, a great, great, great uncle was especially despicable.....John Brown, of the Harper’s Ferry incident! memtb

[alfadan]

There have been many drunks in my ancestry; I might have 2 beers a year so it stops with me. You are a good man far removed from him so you're doing good.

[slim1836]

Yup, John Selman who shot and killed John Wesley Hardin.

Slim

[MUSTANG]

I suspect that there might be some less than "Upstanding" relatives in our families past. A few Black and White Photo's survive from the late 1890's to early 1900's with the "Family Clan" in Texas, Oklahoma, New Mexico on the front porch sporting their Rifles and Pistols prominently in the photo's. Of course; they could also be the posse. Rangers, or... Or perhaps they were on both sides of the "Law" at different times in their lives.

[Scrounge]

Yes, several! But, a great, great, great uncle was especially despicable.....John Brown, of the Harper’s Ferry incident! memtb

I think you'll find that depends on who you talked to about him. Those were some particularly tough times. My great grandma's family was run out of Vienna, MO, by other members of the family because they were abolitionists. They were told to leave or die. this was also in the 1850's, when your great uncle was doing his thing. He was upset about pacifist abolitionists not getting anything done, despite many decades of work, and advocated violence to force the change. And he wasn't shy about applying it, either. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Brown_(abolitionist)

Kind of like the line from Harry Potter: He did great things. Terrible things, but great things. He put his life on the line for what he believed. And he died for his beliefs. Not many people remember my several times great grandparents on either side. He's still remembered today, both positively and negatively.

Bill

[smithnframe]

Welcome to the family LOL!

[memtb]

And another.

Apparently, this one was a “wee bit light in the loafers”! It seems that this young man was in love with a girl about to be married in a large church wedding! I don’t know whether they had any relationship....or if it was “one sided”!

He entered the church during the ceremony, and opened fire on the wedding party. Several were killed or wounded.....including the shooter. He was severely injured, and was lying on his deathbed when his father got to him. Family history says, his father sat by his bedside, placed his pocket watch on the “chamber pot” table and then told his son, ”if you’re not dead by midnight.....I’ll kill you myself”! He didn’t have to kill his son. But, knowing of my ancestors....he would have followed-through with his promise! memtb

[sundog]

Not sure about being a psychopath, but certainly strange - - my paternal Grandmother's first cousins were the Collyer brothers (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collyer_brothers).

I remember older members of the family speaking of them. My mother was at the funeral(s).

Many/most firemen know what a "Collyer House" is.

[Butzbach]

Does slave ownership count? (Asking for a friend . . .)

[memtb]

Does slave ownership count? (Asking for a friend . . .)

Oh.....we gonna go there too! :wink: memtb

[MaryB]

Grandpa on mom's side was hung as a horse thief in the Dakota Territory, great grandfather on mom's side died in the snake river after rusting some cattle and being chased by a posse...All mom ever said about them... Step grandpa on mom's side was killed in a bar brawl up in northern MN when he stole from another logger... I have cousins on that side of the family who are in prison for various things to do with drugs...

Mom always called them the outlaws for a reason... and we never had much contact with any of them. I remember dad breaking one of mom's brothers arms after he touched my oldest sister when she was 12... and tossing him through the door on the way out of the house! Dad was VERY protective of us for a reason. He knew mom's side of the family(and he refused to talk about them) up until the day he died. Not much known of the family history there, just the little my oldest sister got from great grandma Nelson and that was mostly the route and history of the family tree but no specific names. Just that mom's side of the family was Norwegian, Swedish, English, Irish, Scottish(Viking heritage with all of these) then French Canadian then they crossed the border into northern MN... heck I may be part illegal alien LOL back then a lot of fur traded back and forth and a lot of logging went back and forth across the border. And nobody went thru any customs or border patrol...

Dad's side of the family we have traced back to Germany, they immigrated in the 1850's and came to Chicago and were meat cutters before getting land via the Homestead act and clearing 160 acres of MN prairie to start the first dairy farm in a 4 county area. Pretty much all above board law abiding people ignoring grandpa's still down in the creek ravine... he never sold, just personal use...

[marlin39a]

The OP needs help.

[GregLaROCHE]

Everyone has skeletons in there closet. It just depends go far back in generations to find them.

[hoodat]

If you exist today, it's probably because some of your ancestors were tough and ruthless ********. And also likely that some were simply ********. :-P

Times in the past were often tough, and folks didn't survive by being sweet and mild mannered. As human beings, we are all capable of wonderful and terrible things. The more distant that our society gets from God, the more terrible things will become.

It's easy to look around these days and spot many spineless, lazy, bums. Just imagine that these guys had ancestors who endured unimaginable hardships and hard work -- sickness, disease and death simply to produce a whiney, simpering, fool who will waste the opportunity given to him. jd

[hoodat]

Oops, I apologize for my above post. I didn't realize that the word describing illegitimate progeny was off limits. Anyway, I think you get the meaning. jd

[BNE]

If you look far enough and hard enough, you will find someone you hoped was not there!

[frkelly74]

I had a great great ancestor from Arkansas who got on the wrong side of the law somehow. It was serious. His wife smuggled a revolver with one bullet in it into the jailhouse for him to atone for his misdeeds and he used it. My great Grandfather was a railroad engineer going west out of Arkansas. He always had his rifle with him in the engine in incase there was game standing by the tracks that he could take home for dinner. On his last run he took too much time recovering his quarry and got behind schedule. By the time he got going again there was another train coming toward him from the other way and neither one could stop in time. He died in the crash. It was about 1905, I have his watch.

[rockrat]

Family didn't tell many stories. Makes me wonder what they didn't want us kids to know!! Only one I remember is that Grandad talked about his dad lived in Kentucky and had to leave town for some reason, when he was about 18. Grandad never said why as his dad never said why.

[Butzbach]

A couple of family stories were passed down about my Great Grandfather Otto. He had a take down rifle and used to poach deer in the Black Forest in Germany. He finally emigrated to avoid conscription in “the Czar’s army.” I have no idea what “army” when or where. I know he met my Great Grandmother on the boat coming over. Her name and her mother’s were on the manifest. Otto’s was not!

[bakerjw]

A dozen or so years ago, my wife and I were watching a movie about Melvin Purvis. He was the guy who shot Dillinger. In this movie, they were moving in on a suspect in Belville Illinois known as Handsome Jack Klues. Now mind you, Klues is a rather unique name. Now, my mother is a Klues from Quincy Illinois which isn't too far from Belville.
So, after watching this, a few days later, we went over to visit and I brought up "Handsome" Jack Klues and how he had been killed by Purvis. She HAD A FIT! It certainly could not be someone from OUR family. She got really angry about it.
A month or so later, she went to visit my Aunt Gena, One of God's angels, in Quincy. Mom went on to talk about the Handsome fellow and how we had told her about it and made a big deal out of it. She said, "That wasn't one of our family."
Aunt Gena replied, "Ooohhh... Yes. That was Johns boy." John was an uncle. To my mom's credit, she told us all of this long after we'd dropped it. But she didn't like how we made such a big deal about it.
So, yep... Gangsta in the family.

[Idaho45guy]

The OP needs help.

In what way?

[farmbif]

previous generations were pretty much good hardworking souls in my family but have a brother that's a sociopathic narcissistic pathological liar an expert at cons, grift and a thief too. he will surely get his one day, the lord works in mysterious ways.

[DocSavage]

To the OP don't dwell on your distant family's past you are here now and hopefully the blood line after your distant relative have done enough to atone for the terrible things he did.

[contender1]

I think, due to human nature, and the family trees being rather broad,,,, everybody could most likely locate a "bad" person or two as ancestors.
I have a first cousin,, all bad. My wife, her brother AND his sons,, all bad.

Yet,,, I can also point to the fact that there are also a lot of good people in every family as well.

[Harter66]

Dad's side by Surname only crime was being Irish about 1840 but I guess it wasn't as big a deal in Ohio as New York . His mother's side was full of treasoners from at least 1740 to 1789 in the Carolina's ........that's what King George called them anyway .

My 3rd great grandmothers 1st cousin likely sent a fair number of CSA infantry to POW camps , all things being as they are much like James Black above the title of hero or not lays in who's side is telling the story . The Spanish didn't care to much for him either , Teddy Roosevelt liked him well enough to be his 1900 running mate after he settled up that Spanish/American set to .

Mom's side is also filled with architects , aviators , engineers , and 1 horse thief that was caught red handed on his way to enlist in the CSAA . His Daddy caught him and as I understood it 4th generation telling switched his 14 year old hide about every mile all 22 miles back to Nashville .

Owen Hughes circa 1923-26 photo can be found on the legacy wall of a downtown Nashville law office wall where by pure happenstance his GGgrand daughter is employed also as a lawyer .

X1s family while only recently were called criminals engaged in morally repugnant activities politely referred to as line breeding . At least 2 generations 1895-1944 .

X2 had a clean slate

Ms is from Oklahoma and Arkansas . Apparently Frank and James Younger were direct family .

My Dad's Mom always said you can dig up your roots for $500 as deep as you want to go but it'll cost $50,000 to cover them up again .

I suspect there were a lot of questionable folks in the family tree pushed to do many questionable things coming from southern Europe all of the UK to the Virginia Colonies . Several wars , Owen was Artillery in France WWI , Dad's older brother was on a destroyer most noted for sinking one of our own so it wouldn't be captured in the Pacific in WWII .

[wv109323]

My great,great,great grandfather killed his employee for mistreating a horse. He moved about 100 miles and continued his logging business. Family research showed he had three families. In in Missouri, one in Kentucky and one in WV. He never divorced any of them. He apparently died in Missouri under mysterious circumstances.

[Thumbcocker]

To the OP. If you are researching for a novel you might be able to find records of a coroner's inquest, assuming there was one. If you get really lucky there might be a transcript.

[bedbugbilly]

Jus remember that every person has two grandfathers and two grandmothers - from then on, as you go back each generation, the great, great-great, etc. grandparents double each generation you go back.

People are people - always have been, always will be - and there are very few who don't have :skeletons" in their closet. One of mine is Benedict Arnold. One of my great-grandfathers - never knew him - was an abusive drunk - he and my great-grandmother, who was a kind and wonderful woman, divorced in 1898. My grandmother, the youngest of the children, was 14 at the time and had to give testimony against her father at the time - I have the transcript of the hearing and it isn't enjoyable to read.

Sometimes a bit of a shock to learn of such things, but YOU are not your g-grandfather - so don't waste precious time worrying about something that you have no control over and can't change. As a writer, fle it away in your memory as another "circumstance" that you might be able to weave into one of your books that others would find interesting.

[JRD]

bedbugbilly,
That's some great wisdom you shared. Well said.

[Martin Luber]

One was a western NY Sheriff, with a brother, the local bootlegger.

[mexicanjoe]

in our family we've had bootleggers and smugglers along the mexico border. There have been some property disputes settled with gunfire and fist fights. One of my very close relatives outran Texas rangers on horseback when he brought sugar and other commodities across the Glass mountains in the Big Bend area into Texas during WWII. Supposedly this big black stud had one blue eye and could run like the wind at night . For the entirety of the prohibition and WWII, he considered himself a commodities broker and delivered sugar, flour, lard, and other items from mexico to Texas , when rationing was in effect. According to him" Mexico did not have rationing."!

Alcohol was smuggled across the Rio Grande on mules, taking a circuitous route through rugged mountain passes, at night. The transactions were conducted on cattle ranches and then on to the consumers later. So here , I am a 32 year veteran of law enforcement with plenty of history in my family background.... Needles to say, no one has an empty closet.

[JoeJames]

In the part of NE Arkansas where both sides of my family settled before and after the War; there was no law enforcement to speak of. Folks might happen to see the sheriff right before the election and that was it. Whatever happened the rest of the time depended on the parties involved. Most folks were fairly peaceable and avoided trouble. On the second trip to Arkansas there were some 60 people in the wagon train from Georgia. They got to their homeplace just before Christmas of 1868. They'd built the house on the first trip. My great-grandfather, who'd been in a sergeant in the 3rd Confederate Cavalry throughout the War, led the wagon train. Some folks were squatting in the house when they got there. According to my great-uncle, they left pretty hurriedly without much discussion. And all was quiet.

[waksupi]

Jus remember that every person has two grandfathers and two grandmothers - from then on, as you go back each generation, the great, great-great, etc. grandparents double each generation you go back.

People are people - always have been, always will be - and there are very few who don't have :skeletons" in their closet. One of mine is Benedict Arnold. One of my great-grandfathers - never knew him - was an abusive drunk - he and my great-grandmother, who was a kind and wonderful woman, divorced in 1898. My grandmother, the youngest of the children, was 14 at the time and had to give testimony against her father at the time - I have the transcript of the hearing and it isn't enjoyable to read.

Sometimes a bit of a shock to learn of such things, but YOU are not your g-grandfather - so don't waste precious time worrying about something that you have no control over and can't change. As a writer, fle it away in your memory as another "circumstance" that you might be able to weave into one of your books that others would find interesting.

Being a history buff, I read quite a bit about Benedict Arnold. Considering how he was lied to by the government and how he was treated, I don't see him as bad as he was painted.


As far as my family, the most embarrassing person in my family is my sister. She's a liberal.

[gwpercle]

Yes ... and it's an awesome reason not to dig too deeply into your family tree .

People keep turning up that you would rather not be associated with .

Murders , Klansmen , Plantation Owners , Slave Owners , Confederate War Veterans , Bootleggers , Bookies , Mafia Members, Ex-Cons .... one Uncle had a wife and child none of us even knew about ...

No ... you just might find out some stuff best left in the closet .
I went there and didn't like all the bad stuff I found .
Kind of sorry I know what I now know .

No ... you don't want to go poking around ... you gotta take the good with the bad .
Gary

[rockrat]

Having a Sister as a liberal!!!!!?????

I can commiserate, I know how you feel!!!! When mine was mentally able to, we had some quite spirited (loud) political discussions

[farmbif]

i'l trade you, one lying, cheating thieving brother for a liberal sister any day of the week. They both want to take your guns. and to sweeten the trade I'll throw in a subscription to the Washington Times to boot.

[fixit]

I understand.... In my family, my generation is the first in at least three generations in which any man has lived past the age of 60. It seems they drank themselves to death if they hadn't died of something else before then. Between better health care and self care, alcoholism hasn't had the same devastation in this group. Other than that, I don't know what kind of outlaws we've had in my family, other than the fact that my mom's lineage is difficult to find before 1900........

[444ttd]

on my dad's side of the family, we don't talk much about but there are a few. my great grandfather/mother from Poland came over on the boat in 1900. they had 3 boys. i don't know the other two and they are not discussed. in the 1930's my great grandpap had an accident with the train that cut his legs off. he was depressed and then suicide followed. unfortunately, he hung himself in the basement and my grandfather was the first to see him. years go by, my grandpap enlisted in Army during WW2. he was one of the ones who went in the first wave at omaha beech. he told me some tales about the war, but they were funny. he came home, married my grandmother, was a foreman on bethlehem steel until 1980 when he and my dad started construction company(water and sewer lines). but he had a darker side. he cheated on my grandmother(i have a step aunt somewhere) many times, he was all for me, none for you, until he got 85 yo. he was a miserable SOB, but once in a while he was alright. i think his dad had alot to do with it and then WW2 finished him off. i had a uncle but he died young and an aunt that is just like my grandpap.

my mom's side, however, is the complete opposite. i don't know my grandfather's parents and siblings because they all died in a house fire. i do know my grandmothers side of family. there was my great grandfather who died a few months before i was born and my grandmother who had 14 children(one of them died while he was only months old). my grandparents were great!!! my grandpap and i spent summers camping. only one time did my grandma get mad at me(i deserved it). i'll never forget them summers at raystown lake.

[jonp]

Great stories here but remember that people are not black and white, they have all shades of gray. My grandfather walked onto Omaha Beach and then across Europe into Germany. He also hated cats so much he would put kittens into a burlap sack with rocks and fling it into the lake.

[ulav8r]

My wife had an uncle that had a run in with the law. When he enlisted in the Navy, they asked if he had ever been convicted of a crime. He hung his head and said "Yes sir". They then asked what it was, he said "Painting a horse". He was inducted, he and one of his brothers was on the Arizona Dec 7, 1941. Both survived.

[jaysouth]

I had a grandfather, many generations removed, that was fond of kidnapping people and holding them for ransom. He also fomented two rebellions and was responsible for killing many people. Being exiled for two years as the governor of Bordeaux, he was so efficient at collecting taxes that he was know as the butcher of Bordeaux. His name was Henry Percy, 3d Earl of Northampton and known affectionally as "hotspur". Look him up on Wickipedia.

As I ashamed? I wish I could have ridden with him.

[knifemaker]

My great grandfather was William Anderson Hatfield, AKA-Devil Anse Hatfield. My grandfather was elected sheriff of Logan County West Virginia in 1928 and he had the best moonshine still in the county according to the family. Great grandpa did have this thing about feuding with his neighbors on the Kentucky side of the Tug River.

[Scrounge]

My great grandfather was William Anderson Hatfield, AKA-Devil Anse Hatfield. My grandfather was elected sheriff of Logan County West Virginia in 1928 and he had the best moonshine still in the county according to the family. Great grandpa did have this thing about feuding with his neighbors on the Kentucky side of the Tug River.

I was told that one of my great grandfathers was a stone mason, and used to run the whores with Bob Hope's grandpa. No freaking clue if this is a true story or not. His son, my paternal grandfather, was supposedly an enforcer for the Mafia. I don't know if that is true or not, either, but they sure had a bunch of photos of him hanging out with folks wearing zoot suits and fedoras. There are a bunch of drunks and druggies in the family, both sides, and some good folks. I decided a long time ago not to be one of the drunks or druggies, but I'm not sure I made it into the other group, either.

Bill

[Stephen Cohen]

I have one of Australia's worst Rapists as a relative and looking forward to the day he dies and goes to hell. I have always lived by the belief you can pick your friends but not your relatives. I don't believe any here have a reason to feel any shame for the actions of a relative. Regards Stephen

[Gator 45/70]

The family tree is as strait as a telephone pole,
We believe in good breeding and not telling tales of the family.
Like grandmaw and her sisters ran a boarding house in Port Author,Made bathtub Gin
and hid out ship jumpers from Norway in The big Thicket country.
My family could be Saints !

[dverna]

I have seen losers beget losers a lot more than "good" people coming from "bad" families. It does not mean the chain cannot be broken but if I had to bet, I know how I would place my wagers.

We are affected by our family and especially by our fathers. For anyone who doubts that, look at the result of 70% of blacks growing up without a father. If family did not matter, we would not have the mess we have.

[Char-Gar]

Not everybody had Ozzie and Harriett for ancestors. Every bad person was somebody's child and somebody's parent. All that really matters is who we are. It is up to us to give honor to a name and family that will pass on to our children and grandchildren. Each generation is a chance to start fresh.

[waksupi]

My great grandfather was William Anderson Hatfield, AKA-Devil Anse Hatfield. My grandfather was elected sheriff of Logan County West Virginia in 1928 and he had the best moonshine still in the county according to the family. Great grandpa did have this thing about feuding with his neighbors on the Kentucky side of the Tug River.

You must be related to Tim Kennedy?

[popper]

Her side was from 2 brothers who escaped jail in France, came here through Canada. Somebody on her side was a 'wife' of Jesse James. My g.grampa won a case before the supreme court against the railroad. Had a g. uncle who worked with JCP when they were young men. Mom's side was some sort of indian agent in OK territory.

[Scrounge]

There is a Heinlein quote I like about family: I met this sad little lizard who said he was a brontosaurus on his mother's side.

Where we came from is how we got here where we are, today. But it is our decisions that make us who we are. Lots of people out there doing the best they can. Sometimes that ain't too good. Sometimes we learn to do better, sometimes not.

I resemble that remark.

Bill

[blackthorn]

I was adopted out of Winnipeg Manitoba at the age of 8 months. The one attempt I made to find birth family information was derailed due to records being sealed. My adopted family were top of the heap!! My history starts with me.

[Thumbcocker]

There's an old saying:
People who spend all their time talking about how great their ancestors were are just like potatoes. Their best parts are underground.

[15meter]

The worst that I know of in my family was both grandfathers were bootleggers. Mom's side, full complete active, up to and including a conviction and being supeonaed(sp) to testify against the local sheriff in his corruption trail.

IIRC, The governor presided over the corruption trial it was such a big deal.

My dad's side, he just took cash for letting the bootleggers stash whisky in the corn schocks. His farm was less than a half mile inland from the west end of Lake Erie, off a small creek.

The other grandfather was the one driving the model T across the ice from Ontario.

They lived ~ a mile from each other, one a farmer, the other a commercial fisherman, work boats, seine nets and selling fish by the ton.

The sheriff tried to sell his car back to him after he abandoned it and ran for for the marsh after a hot pursuit across the ice.

Surprise, surprise, the whisky was nowhere to be found [smilie=1: when it was returned for $300 cash.

[Bent Ramrod]

My brother, the family geneologist, found these. Our Grandma's brother.

[Capn Jack]

You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your relatives. :popcorn:

[Graybeard96]

Sometimes its better to leave sleeping Dogs lie.

Cheers

[Idaho45guy]

You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your relatives. :popcorn:


I believe it is "you can pick your nose, but not your family." ;)

[Dieselhorses]

This reminds me of the "tell all" 90 day fiancé with the exception that the host will be "sleepy joe" LOL. My future daughter in law got one of those "23 & me" kits. I hope it's not too accurate cuz my family will be in trouble! I won't disclose my ancestry on here but lots of em used Thompson's.

[Traffer]

I am the only psycopath in my family that I know of. also:
You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but don't try to pick your friends nose.

[15meter]

You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your relatives. :popcorn:

Neither I nor my wife will admit being related to our respective "siblings" without a DNA test.[smilie=s:

[405grain]

I am that bad apple! It has been my professed ambition to either be a menace to society, or at the very least, a drag on the system. My lifelong goal is to become a mad scientist, build a giant death ray, aim it at the Earth's core, and take over the entire universe. So far these lofty goals have been somewhat lacking of late, but one can still dream. :-P In the meantime I have remained cleverly disguised as a kind hearted, responsible, and caring person.

[Traffer]

I am that bad apple! It has been my professed ambition to either be a menace to society, or at the very least, a drag on the system. My lifelong goal is to become a mad scientist, build a giant death ray, aim it at the Earth's core, and take over the entire universe. So far these lofty goals have been somewhat lacking of late, but one can still dream. :-P In the meantime I have remained cleverly disguised as a kind hearted, responsible, and caring person.

Sounds like you are going to hold the US ransom for MILLLLLLions of dollars....(Is there a mini-you?)

[2A-Jay]

I don't have to go back very far, My Father was out visiting with his Mistress while my mother was in the hospital giving birth to me, he didn't even see me until I was 2 days old.

[firefly1957]

I know of a couple terrible alcoholics up the line from me some of it passed on with my generation but not myself a lot of drug use with two siblings and mental issues I often wonder which caused which the mental issues causing drinking and drugs or the other wat a round?

I worked with a guy who had a lot of bad blood in his family he was a great guy but could tell some stories and back them up !
I forget how the woman in the book Bitter Blood was related to him she blew herself ,new boy friend and two kids up so her X husband could not get them as a judge ordered.

[PhatForrest]

Not as infamous, but I'm the first man on my paternal side in two generations not to up and abandon his family/children.

Don't look too deep into your own past. Make your own legend and be the change you want to see in the world.

[Winger Ed.]

My family is anything but spectacular.
However; Mrs. Winger's lineage has turned up hints of things where she doesn't want to dig, and learn all the details.

Nothing criminal, just things you wouldn't want all your Church buddies to hear about.