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View Full Version : Good news, bad news. The way of life.



bakerjw
06-02-2021, 11:21 AM
My youngest and his wife are expecting again. They wanted to Skype last night, which is not common for them, to tell everyone the good news.
Normally one would be thrilled but like I told my wife this morning, "Another grandchild that we'll hardly ever see." We've haven't seen our only granddaughter in over 2 years.
What is aggravating is that our DILs mother gets to see her every couple of weeks. But, the mother of the DIL is not allowed to stay with them because she stole pot from them last year. GREAT environment there.

snowwolfe
06-02-2021, 01:30 PM
Why can’t you drive or fly to where they live and visit your granddaughter?

Gone_rabid
06-02-2021, 02:13 PM
It is a 2 way street. As far as the other comment, you can only raise and lead them into the correct direction for so long. They will have to choose their path and hope it’s the right one.

Bmi48219
06-02-2021, 05:14 PM
We have two daughters, one is local and one 1,450 miles away. Twice a year we make the drive to see her, SIL & 3 grandkids. Twice a year they visit us down here. Plus we try to plan a family weekend somewhere halfway. It would be better if we could visit more often but each visit is a week so that’s 28 days a year. I’d be upset about the pot. I hope your son & wife outgrow that. I don’t care if it is legalized, or just recreational. It doesn’t improve life.

bakerjw
06-02-2021, 05:48 PM
It's a 10 hour drive to visit and flying from one regional airport to another through ATL isn't the cheapest. Not to mention the time when Doesn't Ever Leave The Airport cancelled a flight on us at 11:00PM and then couldn't get us to our destination for 2 more days.

My wife's mom and step dad who live right next door are not the most capable of managing these days so my wife is hesitant to leave at all making any vacation for us more misery than it is worth.

ETA, our granddaughter is 6 now and we last saw her when she was 4. My grandmother died was one of my most favorite people in the world and she died when I was 4. I've only a scant recollection of her. Memories from early childhood are often fleeting and that's what we are now.

All written with Mittens playing the "Just try to keep me from the keyboard."

hoodat
06-02-2021, 05:52 PM
Yeah, it really sucks when your mom starts bumming or stealing your weed; or your meth for that matter. :roll:

starnbar
06-02-2021, 05:56 PM
Hey I have no idea if you are retired or not but lately we have taken the train to see our kids it takes longer but we are not on a time table anymore. We met an interesting couple on our way to Carolina they were from Yellowknife North West Terr. lived there for 40 years came south to get warmed up and maybe buy a little place in Fl.

bakerjw
06-02-2021, 06:27 PM
I've got 10 years before I can consider retirement. Possibly never.

See my good things from bad things post.

snowwolfe
06-02-2021, 06:40 PM
It's a 10 hour drive to visit and flying from one regional airport to another through ATL isn't the cheapest. Not to mention the time when Doesn't Ever Leave The Airport cancelled a flight on us at 11:00PM and then couldn't get us to our destination for 2 more days.

My wife's mom and step dad who live right next door are not the most capable of managing these days so my wife is hesitant to leave at all making any vacation for us more misery than it is worth.

ETA, our granddaughter is 6 now and we last saw her when she was 4. My grandmother died was one of my most favorite people in the world and she died when I was 4. I've only a scant recollection of her. Memories from early childhood are often fleeting and that's what we are now.

All written with Mittens playing the "Just try to keep me from the keyboard."

Seems you and the wife could easily overcome these small obstacles if you wanted to.

Bmi48219
06-03-2021, 12:19 AM
Seems you and the wife could easily overcome these small obstacles if you wanted to.

In all fairness, OP & company may have more to deal with than he stated, just like all of us. Over the past decade there have been several situations our kids went through that I was certain required my intervention. My wife calmed me down and she was right. Our kids are adults. They have to learn to play with the cards they selected. You teach them the best you can but ultimately they do as they see fit. All you can do is pray it works out with little or no damage. Infirm parents are another matter, if you don’t take care of them (and they can’t fend for themselves) who will?
The son & his spouse use pot. At best that isn’t a marital plus. OP is powerless to make them change their ways. Sadder still for the grandkids.

bakerjw
06-03-2021, 07:12 AM
Seems you and the wife could easily overcome these small obstacles if you wanted to.

You are correct. They can be overcome but they are not necessarily small obstacles. We have pets to be cared for as well as 2 chicken runs that require daily attention. We're just not a part of their lives by their choice. It sucks but that is what it is.

memtb
06-03-2021, 09:01 AM
I understand and feel for you. I hadn’t seen my kids, grandkids, and great grandkids for 3 years this past April for a myriad of reasons. We finally got down there to spend some time, when my wife’s son had a potentially very serious health scare....we left after a very short visit! memtb

Garyshome
06-03-2021, 09:05 AM
"Yeah, it really sucks when your mom starts bumming or stealing your weed; or your meth for that matter. "

I keep the Meth locked in the Gun safe:p

Garyshome
06-03-2021, 09:09 AM
My nephews wife is a jerk [obama worshiper] some sort of Christian scholar [hence my skepticism of her religious beliefs]. Wouldn't let my sister see the grand kid much, but her mom had the kid all the time. They eventually worked it out pretty much. My nephews wife is still a jerk though. I still have issues though, but who cares!

snowwolfe
06-03-2021, 02:23 PM
You are correct. They can be overcome but they are not necessarily small obstacles. We have pets to be cared for as well as 2 chicken runs that require daily attention. We're just not a part of their lives by their choice. It sucks but that is what it is.

Why is it their choice if you and the wife choose not to visit them for 2 years?