Linstrum
12-08-2005, 07:47 AM
Hawaiiowa Pie & Christmas Hawaiiowa Pie
I know Tim Allen’s show “Tool Time” is gone now, but occasionally his show was actually right on the mark about how men do things compared to women, including women’s work. Now I don’t exactly make my smashed potatoes with a Binford DE7 seven-ton asphalt roller to smash them and then whip them with a Binford 47 HP outboard canoe engine like on Tool Time, but that’s not too far fetched, actually. But we’re talking pie here, which is a bit different than smashed potatoes. One time I wanted some punkin pie in the worst way but it was July and the local store didn’t have any in the bakery section. So I went over to the frozen pie section and there wasn’t one there, either, and I had the sinking feeling that I wasn’t going to get my punkin pie the easy way. I went over to the aisle where the canned stuff is for baking and they had canned pie cherries, blueberries, raspberries, but no doggone punkin pie filling! I asked where it was and the stock clerk told me I had to wait until November. The alternative was to make pie with some Princella Brand candied yams in marshmallow sauce- - - no thanks, gag! I wanted MAN PIE, not some candied sickly sweet sauce stuff. Punkin pie is a MAN PIE and I wanted MAN PIE! No punkin pie was on my menu that night but I really wanted some! Okay, now what? I took a look at what else was available in the store that would make something like what I wanted, and the end results are the following two recipes. And although both are real honest to goodness MAN PIE, all the kids and women love them, too, same as punkin pie! I don’t tell folks over for dinner what kind of pie it is right off, but they always ask for more and that is good enough for me.
Piecrust for one 10-inch pie, each recipe makes one 10-inch pie. A standard 10-inch pie pan holds 6-cups or 1.5 quarts and if your pie pan does not hold this amount you will have pie filling left over. In the event of leftover filling, pour it into custard cups and bake along with the pie for 15-minutes or until a knife blade inserted in center comes out clean.
2 cups flour
½ cup vegetable/cooking oil, like corn oil, soybean oil, safflower, Canola, etc.
2 tablespoons water
Don’t use the water yet. Put only the flour and oil in big bowl and mix with a big fork or pastry blender tool until the flour is the consistency of greensand used for filling a sand casting flask. Now sprinkle the water evenly over it and mix it again until it just starts to get like the consistency of J.B. Weld epoxy. Don’t keep mixing it, it will get REAL tough if you do, like the real J.B. Weld epoxy. Dump it into a 10-inch pie pan and then use your fingers and knuckles to press it around evenly inside the pan and up the edges even with the lip. Set it aside until later. Also, at this point turn on the oven to 400° F, making sure your better half didn’t leave anything in there to dry that will get ruined, like her panty hose. Also make sure that the rack is in the middle position and not down at the bottom or up at the top of the oven.
Pie Filling for Hawaiiowa Pie
1 cup creamed corn, shake up the can before opening it
1 cup compressed crushed pineapple, measured after all the juice is squeezed out of it
1 cup canned milk, undiluted right out of the can
¾ cup sugar
2 tablespoons corn starch
4 eggs
1 tablespoon McCormick/Schilling pumpkin pie spice powder
Christmas Hawaiiowa Pie Filling
1 cup creamed corn, shake up the can before opening it
½ cup compressed crushed pineapple, measured after all the juice is squeezed out of it
½ cup Ocean Spray canned whole berry cranberry sauce
1 cup canned milk, undiluted right out of the can
½ cup sugar
2 tablespoons corn starch
4 eggs
1 tablespoon McCormick/Schilling pumpkin pie spice powder
Put it all into a blender with the dry ingredients going in last and grind it up until it is a very smooth thick soupy liquid, about two or three minutes. I think one of those food processor things will work, too. It has to grind up all of the creamed corn and pineapple chunks so you can’t tell what it used to be for it to taste right. After blending, the volume should be right at 4-cups (one quart). Pour the stuff into the dough lined pie pan and then put into the oven. You might need to pour half of it into the pan before you put it in the oven and then ladle the rest of it into the pan with a teacup because it should be right up about 3/8-inch from the top of the pie pan. If you are like me it will get spilled all over the oven door while you are trying to get it onto the rack in the oven. Bake it for 50-minutes if you know your oven temperature is accurate. If you aren’t sure, after about 45-minutes take a clean dry knife and stick it all the way down into the pie about a third of the way from the center then pull it right back out. If it comes out clean the pie is done. If it comes out coated keep baking it and check every ten minutes until it comes out clean. When done put the pie on a cooling rack until it cools to room temperature and refrigerate what is left if it doesn’t all get eaten.
The two pies are distinctly different in flavor even though having pretty similar ingredients.
Why is it called Hawaiiowa pie? Well, what state is famous for growing pineapples? What state is famous for growing corn?
Why is it called Christmas Hawaiiowa pie? Thanksgiving and punkin pie already go together and if I called it Thanksgiving Hawaiiowa Pie everybody would think it was just punkin pie, but in my family Christmas dinner also has cranberries served with the turkey and if I called it Christmas pie nobody would think it was punkin pie. They might think it had peppermint candy canes in it, though. :veryconfu
I know Tim Allen’s show “Tool Time” is gone now, but occasionally his show was actually right on the mark about how men do things compared to women, including women’s work. Now I don’t exactly make my smashed potatoes with a Binford DE7 seven-ton asphalt roller to smash them and then whip them with a Binford 47 HP outboard canoe engine like on Tool Time, but that’s not too far fetched, actually. But we’re talking pie here, which is a bit different than smashed potatoes. One time I wanted some punkin pie in the worst way but it was July and the local store didn’t have any in the bakery section. So I went over to the frozen pie section and there wasn’t one there, either, and I had the sinking feeling that I wasn’t going to get my punkin pie the easy way. I went over to the aisle where the canned stuff is for baking and they had canned pie cherries, blueberries, raspberries, but no doggone punkin pie filling! I asked where it was and the stock clerk told me I had to wait until November. The alternative was to make pie with some Princella Brand candied yams in marshmallow sauce- - - no thanks, gag! I wanted MAN PIE, not some candied sickly sweet sauce stuff. Punkin pie is a MAN PIE and I wanted MAN PIE! No punkin pie was on my menu that night but I really wanted some! Okay, now what? I took a look at what else was available in the store that would make something like what I wanted, and the end results are the following two recipes. And although both are real honest to goodness MAN PIE, all the kids and women love them, too, same as punkin pie! I don’t tell folks over for dinner what kind of pie it is right off, but they always ask for more and that is good enough for me.
Piecrust for one 10-inch pie, each recipe makes one 10-inch pie. A standard 10-inch pie pan holds 6-cups or 1.5 quarts and if your pie pan does not hold this amount you will have pie filling left over. In the event of leftover filling, pour it into custard cups and bake along with the pie for 15-minutes or until a knife blade inserted in center comes out clean.
2 cups flour
½ cup vegetable/cooking oil, like corn oil, soybean oil, safflower, Canola, etc.
2 tablespoons water
Don’t use the water yet. Put only the flour and oil in big bowl and mix with a big fork or pastry blender tool until the flour is the consistency of greensand used for filling a sand casting flask. Now sprinkle the water evenly over it and mix it again until it just starts to get like the consistency of J.B. Weld epoxy. Don’t keep mixing it, it will get REAL tough if you do, like the real J.B. Weld epoxy. Dump it into a 10-inch pie pan and then use your fingers and knuckles to press it around evenly inside the pan and up the edges even with the lip. Set it aside until later. Also, at this point turn on the oven to 400° F, making sure your better half didn’t leave anything in there to dry that will get ruined, like her panty hose. Also make sure that the rack is in the middle position and not down at the bottom or up at the top of the oven.
Pie Filling for Hawaiiowa Pie
1 cup creamed corn, shake up the can before opening it
1 cup compressed crushed pineapple, measured after all the juice is squeezed out of it
1 cup canned milk, undiluted right out of the can
¾ cup sugar
2 tablespoons corn starch
4 eggs
1 tablespoon McCormick/Schilling pumpkin pie spice powder
Christmas Hawaiiowa Pie Filling
1 cup creamed corn, shake up the can before opening it
½ cup compressed crushed pineapple, measured after all the juice is squeezed out of it
½ cup Ocean Spray canned whole berry cranberry sauce
1 cup canned milk, undiluted right out of the can
½ cup sugar
2 tablespoons corn starch
4 eggs
1 tablespoon McCormick/Schilling pumpkin pie spice powder
Put it all into a blender with the dry ingredients going in last and grind it up until it is a very smooth thick soupy liquid, about two or three minutes. I think one of those food processor things will work, too. It has to grind up all of the creamed corn and pineapple chunks so you can’t tell what it used to be for it to taste right. After blending, the volume should be right at 4-cups (one quart). Pour the stuff into the dough lined pie pan and then put into the oven. You might need to pour half of it into the pan before you put it in the oven and then ladle the rest of it into the pan with a teacup because it should be right up about 3/8-inch from the top of the pie pan. If you are like me it will get spilled all over the oven door while you are trying to get it onto the rack in the oven. Bake it for 50-minutes if you know your oven temperature is accurate. If you aren’t sure, after about 45-minutes take a clean dry knife and stick it all the way down into the pie about a third of the way from the center then pull it right back out. If it comes out clean the pie is done. If it comes out coated keep baking it and check every ten minutes until it comes out clean. When done put the pie on a cooling rack until it cools to room temperature and refrigerate what is left if it doesn’t all get eaten.
The two pies are distinctly different in flavor even though having pretty similar ingredients.
Why is it called Hawaiiowa pie? Well, what state is famous for growing pineapples? What state is famous for growing corn?
Why is it called Christmas Hawaiiowa pie? Thanksgiving and punkin pie already go together and if I called it Thanksgiving Hawaiiowa Pie everybody would think it was just punkin pie, but in my family Christmas dinner also has cranberries served with the turkey and if I called it Christmas pie nobody would think it was punkin pie. They might think it had peppermint candy canes in it, though. :veryconfu