Janet

[Boaz]

Becky's mother is in an assisted living facility . Her roommate for the last 3 years is Janet .
During the last 3 years I have had a 'Talking" relationship with Janice . I have never asked her any personal questions , just listened a lot mainly and I bring her a Hershey bar with a 12 pack of Dr Pepper every Sunday when I pick up Becky's mom for church .

Two weeks ago I was leaving after checking on Becky's mom and Janet was coming in from taking her little dog named Little Bit out for a 'break' . I started talking to her and she seemed to want to talk so we sat in the 'family room' and talked about 30 min . She had COPD and a few other medical problems , rolled an oxygen tank every where she went .

In all the times I have been to the facility I had never seen anyone family or friend visit her . We talked quite a bit . She had been feeling bad and they found 2 'spots' on her left lung , she was worried . I tried to be encouraging , we talked of GOD , she professed her belief . I told her again she was welcome to come with us to church ....she declined , seemingly unsure what to do . I left it open .

Today I went to check on Becky's mom . Janet's side of the room was empty , I asked about her . They said she had been taken to the hospital 2 days ago and died that night . I was holding a Hershey bar in my hand while I talked to the staff . I was lost .

[smokeywolf]

We spend our time on Earth learning and teaching. When our experience and knowledge becomes more useful in Heaven than on Earth, God calls us up.

You and Becky's mom and Janet were lucky to have been able to cherish and support each other.

[DougGuy]

I had a former gf who had COPD as well. Hers was fairly advanced. She moved back to Indiana to be near family, and went through some hardships there, but seemed to be doing okay. I spoke with her on a Wednesday evening, she was in the hospital, but was of strong voice in this call, and was optimistic about getting out. Friday night her daughter called me and informed me that she had passed away. It is a shock but this is how COPD claims it's victims, they have just the least bit of respiratory distress and it compounds very quickly and takes them with a rapid buildup of fluid in the lungs maybe? Faster than the docs can keep up with it seems.

[rancher1913]

your chocolate and soda probably meant more to her than you will ever know.

[WRideout]

Showing kindness to others is the most Christian thing anyone can do. The Holy Spirit was using you.

Wayne

[GhostHawk]

They say that GOD moves in mysterious ways.

I think that he uses those who listen to help those in need.

Brother Boaz, thou good and faithful servant, well done!
You did what you could.

[shoot-n-lead]

Good for you...I am sure that you blessed her with your interest in and love for her.

[Boaz]

It was a shock to me that she was just ...gone . I more than understand how temporary and tenuis our lives are here . I had asked her the day before Thanksgiving if she would come to the house and have Thanksgiving with us but she declined .
Our present situation with Becky's mom getting her to church is that Becky leaves early ands get mom dressed . Then I pick her up for the worship service . Until 3-4 months ago we picked her up earlier and took her to bible study before the service . But now that's too long for her , her attention span is very short , she goes to sleep or gets very nervous . She still loves to sing the hymns and remembers most of the words . She loves seeing the babies and little kids . Many of the senior class go out of their way to lay a hand on her shoulder or hold her hand and talk to her .
When I picked her up Janet would straighten her clothes , smooth her hair . When we left the room she always told mom ;
Now you hold Charlie's hand and do what he tells you to do . I'll take you to the dining room when you get back !

We have lost a friend , she was a great asset in her quiet way . She will be missed .

[castalott]

[QUOTE

Brother Boaz, thou good and faithful servant, well done!
You did what you could.[/QUOTE]


This...

Mom had an almost 3 year stay in a home & you come to love those people there.... kind , gentle, good people in a bad place.... your heart suffers when one passes....

You have a good heart, my brother.... I'm proud to call you that...


Dale

[Pine Baron]

Thank you, Charlie. You willingly and faithfully followed the path that God laid out before you. I am grateful that you were part of God's plan for Janet, she is in a better place, but you know that.
I am puzzled about one thing. How are you "lost"?

[Boaz]

Pine Baron the shock of showing up and finding her gone . Thinking I should have/could have done more . I could not have saved her life , I know that . You always wonder after they are gone if you could have done more .

[Pine Baron]

I understand.

[USMC87]

I can relate to your shock Charlie, I am so happy that you witnessed to Janet and was used by God for uplifting Christ to others. Thanks for sharing this with us as we all have something to learn here.

[Boaz]

I thank you for the kind words . Today will be different , there is no need to take a 12 pack of Dr Pepper and a plain Hershey bar to the rest home . I'll do what needs be done but tere will be a void .
Becky's mom gave Janet a chance to serve . No telling how many hours she spent finding things mom had lost . Changing the channel on the tv trying to find a show she could watch . Keeping her safe and out of trouble , she treated mom like a child .

Janet told me that mom would give away all the cokes and snacks we brought her after we left them . It made her mad others took advantage of her , I just told her it was ok . If it made mom happy to just let her do it . She tried to protect her like a child . She served well .

[Ithaca Gunner]

Janet's story will be of value to others. I can not count the funerals of good a faithful servants of the lord I've attended. Some I knew a very long time, others, I had just gotten to know. None were pastors, but all in their own way were fishers of men.

[castalott]

My mom was a giving person...always cooking for others..... well, when she went to the home.... I would get a couple of big pizzas cut into small pieces and put a box on mom's wheelchair tray... I would push her around the place and say, " Mom cooked a pizza in her flower pot! Made the box and everything! Want some?" Mom would then open the lid on the box and hand them a napkin so they could get a piece of pizza. Mom would give them her silly grin (she couldn't talk by this time) and everyone laughed. I always told them... "Pizza isn't free... Mom needs a hug for her work."

Everyone would hug her or give her a kiss on the forehead... "Thank You Miss Hazel!"

My mom loved doing this.... She felt like she was helping....


Hang in there ,Charlie.... We are all with you....

[Blackwater]

Charlie, you did very well. And it really doesn't matter if she felt like going to church. "Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved." Most, on conversion, will want to go, but it's not a "must." And none of us know that any of us or our friends and acquaintances will be here tomorrow. These things are lessons, if we'll let them be. It's one of the chief reasons why we've been admonished to share the Word whenever an opportunity arises. You did that, Charlie, and that's what matters most. She obviously had a good heart, and now, she's probably feeling sorry for us who've been left here in this realm, where we've all got many battles left to fight. She'll be at peace, while we still struggle.

And it's always a shock when we lose someone we know and care for, but shocks CAN be good for us, if we'll but take them as they're meant to be taken - a reminder that tomorrow is promised to no one in this realm. Another good reason why it's said we should "never put off until tomorrow what we can do today." You did well, Charlie. None of us is perfect, and it's foolish for us to expect more of ourselves than we can reasonably do, in our human condition. When someone does what you did, it's a "jewel in their crown," so though the sadness can't be gotten around, at least you have the satisfaction that you did good. That's par for the course here, if not a real birdie in most cases. We have to become satisfied that we're not perfect, while letting that knowledge help us learn to do a little more and better each day. But as Christ does with us, we have to accept that we're flawed creatures, and can never know exactly what to do in all cases, or sometimes, how best to go about doing it. All we can really do, is simply cast our bread upon the waters, and not all of it will flow back to us. But some does, and we're supposed to be content with that. Even Christ couldn't save us all. We can't do what he couldn't/wouldn't, so take pride and satisfaction that you did what you did. I'm betting she's still thanking you, more than you or any of us realize.

[Boaz]

I'm sad she had to go but glad she is home . Just wish I had more time with her . I know she had depression , I think her past had problems she created or blamed herself for . I had been talking to her more along trying to encourage her . Would have liked to had more time with her . She gave a testimonial of faith in that short 30 min conversation I had with her . She was good to go . The pain is gone , the tears wiped away . Praise GOD !

[buckwheatpaul]

Charlie, You made a difference to a lady that was lost and friendless. You fulfilled a void that God called on you to fill ... you listened and you ministered. Rest with the knowledge that you made a difference brother! Paul

[Hickok]

Charlie your visits and your invitation to attend church may have had more effect than you can realize. The Holy Ghost had been calling to Janet to come to salvation through our Lord Jesus. She may have accepted the call.

[GhostHawk]

Hickok just said what I have been feeling. She may have waited until she was alone and then turned to the Lord. It is impossible foe us to know. Or to know all of the ramifications of our actions. Only when we stand before our Lord will we know all.

For now, know that you did the very best you could with what you had to work with.

Keep the faith brother!

[Blackwater]

Yes, it's "natural" for us to want to know all sorts of things that we can't truly know. Being humble and satisfied enough to entrust those things to the Lord is part of following Him. Casting our bread is our assigned task, and I suspect highly, that none of us know how many people we've truly affected for the better or worse, as to faith. What a great thing it is that when we are brought to Light, our sins are cast away as far as the east is from the west! I am truly grateful for the inestimable benefit of salvation, and it'll always humble me greatly. Thank God for our Savior!

[edler7]

Her work on Earth was done, and she was called home.

Oxygen tanks, struggling to breathe, being alone.....all gone. There's a better home a'waiting....

[gunhawk]

You had the goodness of spirit to reach out to this person. Many would not have.
Giving our time to someone, especially those in need and the lonely, is probably the most valuable thing we can give to another.
God Bless you.

[slim1836]

You did well brother, may she rest in peace.

Slim

[Boaz]

I'm good . I have no regrets . Your right ....I did what I could . Janet had problems both physically and I feel she was carrying a lot of failings she hadn't dealt with . I just tried to open her up but the Lord needed her home ............not mine to figure .
She gave a profession of faith when we sat in the family room , to talk was her idea . I do wish she could have come around sooner so she could have had more peace with herself but no matter . She is home now .

She left a small legacy . Her small yellow dog little bit grew up at the facility , Janet spoiled her . That little dog gave Becky's mom a lot of comfort and helped pass the time . Janet's family wouldn't take her so a patient down the hall has her . All the patients love her , Janet/GOD have done well . She will provide a lot of happiness for the residents , good little service dog and still be very spoiled in the process .

[WRideout]

Pine Baron the shock of showing up and finding her gone . Thinking I should have/could have done more . I could not have saved her life , I know that . You always wonder after they are gone if you could have done more .

Sometimes, what you can give is enough.
Wayne