A question of CCW etiquette

[Bookworm]

I was cogitating on this the other day, and since Emily Post is busy being dead, I figured I'd ask here.

Say you are in possession your favorite carry firearm, properly concealed. You go to someone's house, say an acquaintance - someone you know, but with whom perhaps you are not real familiar; not close friends.

Do you tell them you're packing ?

How 'bout going to the house of family ? For instance, my parents (in their 80's) - Dad doesn't care. Mom... well she would prefer no firearms on the planet. I once told her I had a weapon - she would not allow it in the house in usable condition. I dismantled it, and stored it in my luggage (they do not live near me, a visit is a journey - I do not go on journeys unarmed).

It could be said that to not tell them would be an act of disrespect - i.e. : this is my house, my rules, I want to know who in it is armed.

Opinions ?

[DCP]

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

Enough Said

[bob208]

if it is concealed then that is where it is unless you have to shoot some one. it stays in the holster unless you are going to shoot someone


those two rules and you will never have an encounter with a do gooder or an a-d in a restaurant or a noob walking around asking guestions in a mall or store.

[flyingmonkey35]

DCP is correct.

Concealed is concealed. Maintain 100% full control of your firearm at all times.

I love Moms but you should educate her that no fire arm knife or any other weapon has ever woke up on its own and gone on a killing spree.

That your gun is more safe then the knifes in the kitchen because you know where it is at all times.

I ran into the same issue with my family. I went to a don't ask don't Tell policy.




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[Bonz]

I would never consider carrying a gun inside a persons home without their consent.

[SteveS]

I keep it concealed and don't mention it. I must admit, there are a couple of places I don't visit though.

[LUCKYDAWG13]

I would not say a word and carry on

[shaner]

If they are friends and know you. Then THEY SHOUTcast Figure You Are

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[dverna]

A person's home is theirs. They make the rules. If someone told me I could not carry in their home, I would comply. You MUST respect their wishes.

I do NOT ask if I can carry in someone's home. I am carrying legally and see no reason to make an issue of it. Now, if you start drinking alcohol in their home, you are NO LONGER carrying legally (at least in MI).

Nearly all the friends I have here (rural MI) are gun people but most do not carry. If we are visiting and are going to have a few, I leave the gun at home. If I am carrying, and drop in at a neighbor's (unplanned visit), I drink a soda. The first couple of times they wondered why I would not have a drink and I told them I was carrying.

[762 shooter]

Where do you stop?

No guns. No knives. No hammers. No pens or pencils.

I guess to be completely respectful, you should present a list of everything you have on your person to see if anything would be objectionable. No need to stop at guns.

If they told me I could not carry in their home, I would not. But I would examine whether I needed to go into their home.

762

[Bookworm]

OP here...

As I expected, cogent arguments on both sides.

There exists a political party that made a campaign slogan out of "don't ask, don't tell".

I'll tell you what I have decided - concealed is concealed. However, if confronted, I will either put the firearm someplace immediately inaccessible (car, luggage, etc), or leave the premises (and question whether to return).

As for Mom - I cannot disrespect her wishes to the extent of blatantly disregarding her direct instructions. She is my mother. I'm fairly certain one of the Commandments addresses this.

[Ickisrulz]

As for Mom - I cannot disrespect her wishes to the extent of blatantly disregarding her direct instructions. She is my mother. I'm fairly certain one of the Commandments addresses this.

Obey as a child...honor as an adult. Relationships change between parents and children.

Does legally carrying a gun dishonor your mother? That is up to your conscience. I'd say no and carry on.

[BrassMagnet]

One of my Wife's cousin's wife didn't like me coming to Christmas get togethers at her house. We quit going there. Another cousin started hosting the Christmas get togethers. We started going again.
Last Christmas, the cousin and cousin's wife that started the problems were there. They both showed us all their new CCWs! The times are changing! Next, all of the cousins started showing off their AR platform they kept in the car for safe travel in dangerous times.
So out came the AR-10T, Gov't model scope, and travel pack of ammo. Various mags loaded with M118, M852, and commercial 165 grain hunting ammo. A great time was had by all!
Now to find some AP.

If they can't guarantee my safety I don't need to go there!

[Iowa Fox]

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

Enough Said

Exactly !

Plus you have to feel comfortable mentally to CCW.

[runfiverun]

their house their rules.
it needn't be an argument, just comply and move along with your visit.
after a couple of visits they might know YOU better too and feel more comfortable with you having it on your person.
if meeting at someone's house I didn't know that well I would take the pistol out of the holster and leave it in the truck.

[elmacgyver0]

Do you tell everyone you wear Mickey Mouse underwear?
If they knew you did they might be offended.

[Bookworm]

Obey as a child...honor as an adult. Relationships change between parents and children.

Does legally carrying a gun dishonor your mother? That is up to your conscience. I'd say no and carry on.

Legally carrying does not dishonor Mom. She did, however, directly tell me to not bring a firearm into her house.
To do otherwise would be, I think, dishonorable. You may have a different view, and that's fine.
Difference of opinion is what makes a horse race, as my Granddad used to say.

[Ickisrulz]

Here we are treating a gun like a unique object. Suppose your parents objected to getting your kids vaccinated. Would you do it anyway?

You either need a gun or you do not. If you don't feel you need it, leave it home. If you are going into the danger zone....that's another story. Some peoples' homes and neighborhoods are dangerous.

Just my ideas on the subject anyway.

[farmerjim]

In Louisiana you must obtain the permission of the homeowner.

LARS 40:1379.3 Statewide permits for concealed handguns; application procedures; definitions (http://www.legis.state.la.us/lss/lss.asp?doc=97451) specifically REQUIRES that before entering the private residence of another, that you first obtain permission if you are carrying under the authority of your permit.

[B. Lumpkin]

Mustang Pocketlite

[WebMonkey]

Fully support ccw.
Do NOT support someone telling me, by word or deed, THEY decide how my house is run.

On the other side of the coin, I can choose not to visit a home where I disagree with their policies.
I have no right to willfully act against.

What they don't know won't hurt them is a load of junk.
The same junk we all say the government isnt allowed to do.
Set the example.
:)

[montana_charlie]

Fully support ccw.
Do NOT support someone telling me, by word or deed, THEY decide how my house is run.

On the other side of the coin, I can choose not to visit a home where I disagree with their policies.
I have no right to willfully act against.

What they don't know won't hurt them is a load of junk.
The same junk we all say the government isnt allowed to do.
Set the example.
:)
I'll back that view ... including the last part.

[ironhead7544]

A firearm is emergency life saving equipment.

Unless it is an actual legal thing, I just would not mention it.

I prefer not to rely on the mercy of strangers.

[NavyVet1959]

In Louisiana you must obtain the permission of the homeowner.

LARS 40:1379.3 Statewide permits for concealed handguns; application procedures; definitions (http://www.legis.state.la.us/lss/lss.asp?doc=97451) specifically REQUIRES that before entering the private residence of another, that you first obtain permission if you are carrying under the authority of your permit.

I read the entire 40:1379.3 and I have to say, leave it to Louisiana politicians to take something simple and make it extremely complicated. Kind of reminds me of the parking signs in New Orleans near the French Quarter -- numerous signs on one post saying you can park and then with exceptions and exceptions to the exceptions and then exceptions to the exceptions to the exceptions. It was less trouble to just drive a bit further to find someplace without any signs than to try to figure out what all the signs meant.

Of course, this only applies to concealed carry since open carry is legal in Louisiana without a license.

[NavyVet1959]

Until Texas legalized Open Carry (for license holders), you could not *legally* open carry at a friend's or your family's house even with permission. Most Texans didn't know that and I suspect that law was violated quite often. I know I violated it many times.

So, let's say that you are going to college or in the military and your official residence is still the address of your parents. As such, when you went back there you could legally open carry since it was "your own property". Once you get your own apartment though, if you went back, you could no longer legally open carry. If you don't have a CHL (LTC) in Texas, that's still the law.

[KenH]

Legally carrying does not dishonor Mom. She did, however, directly tell me to not bring a firearm into her house.
To do otherwise would be, I think, dishonorable. You may have a different view, and that's fine.
Difference of opinion is what makes a horse race, as my Granddad used to say.

My feelings exactly - it's your Mom!!!!!

[DCP]

Fully support ccw.
Do NOT support someone telling me, by word or deed, THEY decide how my house is run.

On the other side of the coin, I can choose not to visit a home where I disagree with their policies.
I have no right to willfully act against.

What they don't know won't hurt them is a load of junk.
The same junk we all say the government isnt allowed to do.
Set the example.
:)

I am setting an example
Too many here what it both ways.
Its the 2nd amendment, live it or lose it

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

If they know YOU are concealing you did something VERY WRONG
Enough Said

[NavyVet1959]

I am setting an example
To many here what it both ways.
Its the 2nd amendment, live it or lose it

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

If they know YOU are concealing you did something VERY WRONG
Enough Said

There's TRULY being concealed and there's LEGALLY being concealed.

If I was in NYC, then I would want to be TRULY concealed. Here in Texas, I just need to be LEGALLY concealed.

But, since it is often cold enough to wear heavy clothing in NYC, being TRULY concealed is a lot easier. Here in Texas, for much of the year, anything thicker than a t-shirt is an invitation for Mr. Heatstroke. :)

In my family though, there is a high percentage of people who either carry or at least shoot a lot, so any sort of family gathering eventually evolves into discussions of what new firearms you acquired or what you are carrying today. Which often means that the guns get unloaded and passed around the dinner table.

And despite there often being quite a bit of alcohol at these family gatherings, not a single person has ever been shot or had an AD/ND at these gatherings.

[Echo]

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

Enough Said

Plus One...

[Petrol & Powder]

Without getting too far afield here; If I invite someone into my house I'm pretty much past the point where I care if they're armed or not.

Now, do others share that same philosophy when I go to their homes? I'm not sure.

I've never really thought about it from the viewpoint that the mere presence of a gun might be offensive to others. My first instinct is; if they don't know about it- it cannot possibly be an issue. My second thought is: if it becomes an issue, I'll deal with it.
I don't carry a gun into the homes of my friends because I'm concerned with what may happen inside those houses. I trust my friends completely. If I didn't trust them, they wouldn't be my friends. I carry a gun into those homes because it is easier to maintain possession of the gun on my person as opposed to securing it somewhere for the duration of my visit.

The OP presents a situation of an acquaintance, which to me is very different than a friend. In that situation, the gun is staying with me and if they find out about it and don't like it - too bad. I'll be happy to leave.

[WebMonkey]

I am setting an example
Too many here what it both ways.
Its the 2nd amendment, live it or lose it

If your carry concealed correctly. NO ONE should ever no you have it.

If they know YOU are concealing you did something VERY WRONG
Enough Said

well, no, not enough said.

somehow you've arrived at the conclusion that the 2nd amendment has give you, a private citizen, authority over me within the boundaries of my private property.

you then conclude that carrying concealed adds something to the argument.

this is having it both ways.
the 2nd does not specify concealed or open, therefore there is no such classification according to the 2nd.
yet you use the 2nd as foundation to tell me that not only do i want something both ways, but also that you can tell me what to do/not do on my own property as far as carrying a concealed firearm onto my property after being informed not to do so.

yeah, that would be a terrible precedent if set in the court system.

i can, and i will set policy on my property.
i own it, not the bank, not anyone else.
they're expression of disagreement with me is to not visit me.
it is not to secretly do it anyway. (the whole it's concealed so they will never know argument)
i am a disabled combat veteran (just like a lot of others here) and hold the constitution very dear.
i do not have a no firearms allowed policy here.
a private citizen telling me they have a right to carry anything on my property against my consent gets me riled i guess.

i'll quit as my post count brings the assumption that i couldn't possibly know anything.
:)

[StolzerandSons]

Its the 2nd amendment,...

Your rights end at my property line, you do not have the right to free speech on my property, you do not have the right to carry on my property without my permission, I might just decide I want to search you person, vehicle or possessions...if you don't want to give up those rights then you don't have to come on my property but if you chose to come on my property you will abide by my rules.

If you chose to disregard my rules whatever they may be and disrespect me by ignoring them you might be invited to leave my property at gun point while the sheriff is being called to enforce my desire for you to leave my property.

The idea that it's okay to force your rights over another persons(property rights in this case) should be abhorrent to anyone who truly believes in individual rights and freedoms.

[DCP]

well, no, not enough said.

somehow you've arrived at the conclusion that the 2nd amendment has give you, a private citizen, authority over me within the boundaries of my private property.

you then conclude that carrying concealed adds something to the argument.

this is having it both ways.
the 2nd does not specify concealed or open, therefore there is no such classification according to the 2nd.
yet you use the 2nd as foundation to tell me that not only do i want something both ways, but also that you can tell me what to do/not do on my own property as far as carrying a concealed firearm onto my property after being informed not to do so.

yeah, that would be a terrible precedent if set in the court system.

i can, and i will set policy on my property.
i own it, not the bank, not anyone else.
they're expression of disagreement with me is to not visit me.
it is not to secretly do it anyway. (the whole it's concealed so they will never know argument)
i am a disabled combat veteran and hold the constitution very dear.
i do not have a no firearms allowed policy here.
a private citizen telling me they have a right to carry anything on my property against my consent gets me riled i guess.

i'll quit as my post count brings the assumption that i couldn't possibly know anything.
:)

Well here you go

You sound just like the
Cities,States and the Federal Government.

So now it reads
Private Property,Cities,States and the Federal Government.
or
Mom, individuals,Private Property,Cities,States and the Federal Government.

By the way I love my mother very much.
But she is a pacifist and a afraidy cat.

I was 6-3 205lbs as senior in HS
She would not allow me to play football because I was to little.
Only 2 people in my senior class were bigger than me.

My point is she didn't approve me being a Firefighter,LEO, or the USCG.

[Ickisrulz]

How many here ignore the no gun signs when shopping or eating out? I personally don't pay any attention.

[StolzerandSons]

How many here ignore the no gun signs when shopping or eating out? I personally don't pay any attention.
I make it a point not to do business with stores and restaurants that don't allow me to carry. They have the right not to allow firearms in their business and I have the right to spend my money some place else. It's a good arrangement for both of us in my opinion.

[BrassMagnet]

I make it a point not to do business with stores and restaurants that don't allow me to carry. They have the right not to allow firearms in their business and I have the right to spend my money some place else. It's a good arrangement for both of us in my opinion.

I totally agree!
A "Gun Free Zone" is a mass murder zone.
Let the "Free Market" teach them to be more responsive to more customers or let the free market teach them about bankrupcy.

[Blackwater]

Having a right doesn't negate the propriety of simple manners. However, depending on the situation, what constitutes "manners" can be rather a question. I carry pretty much 24/7, but few ever know. It's a small gun, but it's always there. I've taken it out when necessary in my doc's office, and nobody has ever commented on it in any way, but if they did, I'd probably get another doc. Same with friends, if for some reason they ever find out I'm carrying and take offense to it. Their house, their right to take offense, of course, but it's also MY right to be offended at their attitude, and if they think they have a right to limit MY rights, I think that's sound grounds for my feeling offended, and not returning. Rights either apply all around, or they're not real rights, and anyone who wants to can be offended by MY exercising my rights, but I'll also have the right to return the favor and sentiment. It's a two way street.

When it's family, that gets to be a tough question. But principles just don't change because of kinships. It's a toss up, and we all have a right to make those kinds of decisions, but if it were me, I'd be rather a rare visitor and I'd let them know exactly why. If they think I'm somebody who "might go off on a shooting spree," then they shouldn't invite me in the first place. But logic doesn't have much effect on emotions, and those kinds of "thoughts" are never based on intellectual principles, but entirely on emotions and fears. Life can present us with tough calls sometimes. It's up to us how to handle them.

[rl69]

Count my as one who thinks my rights end at your property line.

my question is, who's house are you going too that you don't know whether or not it's ok to carry?

If if I go to WebMonkeys house I know it's ok to carry. If I go to bookworms moms house I need to leave it in the truck.

Now a place of business? It depends on the business

[Geezer in NH]

Plus One...

Plus two

You are a moron if you get made.

You are freaking weird if you got a problem with statements made by folks if you carry in my home.

Get your things straight you are a libtard when you feel only I can carry a firearm any where I am.

Sad state here of gun owners.

IMHO civilized people do not ask are you carrying a weapon.

By the way try and search me physically be prepared to repel boarders. You will be unable to call for help shortly after but, "This" will never happen as I do not associate with your type in the first place.

BY BY Libtards. Last post here on this subject.

[ShooterAZ]

AZ has both open carry and concealed carry, no permit required. I however will respect the wishes of whomever I am visiting, though I may not mention the fact that I am carrying. If a conversation comes up and it is mentioned, then I will know. I'm not going to bring it up. I don't tend to hang out with liberals, so it's not generally a problem. My Mom is a liberal, lives in New Mexico, and hates guns. She knows I have brought guns into her home, but has never said anything to the contrary about it. If she did, I would certainly respect her wishes and leave it in the truck.

[NavyVet1959]

IMHO civilized people do not ask are you carrying a weapon.

Civilization is entirely overrated...

Nawh, you don't ask if someone is carrying, you ask *what* they are carrying. :) It's a good conversation starter...

It then progresses to whether you reload and then to whether you cast...

[TXGunNut]

Civilization is entirely overrated...

Nawh, you don't ask if someone is carrying, you ask *what* they are carrying. :) It's a good conversation starter...

It then progresses to whether you reload and then to whether you cast...



Great big +1!!!!!!!

[swamp]

The Bill of Rights limits what the government con do. Not what people or companies and business can do. To me it is the property owner who makes the rules. Don't like it, don't visit.
swamp

[winelover]

In Arkansas....you must have the homeowners consent.

Winelover