I must be delusional!

[winchester85]

Let me start by explaining a few things. I am not a very social person, and I do not meet people well, especially beautiful women.

A few weeks ago the people who's property take care of got me one of those new smart phones. The youngest boy (21) has helped me learn how to use it. And, he installed the Tinder app on it. Soooo, being the live by myself for 28 years guy, (44 years old now), I was hoping to maybe use it to meet someone. Last Friday evening I was drinking a Pabst or two and waiting for the woodstove to heat up the house and decided to see what I could find on Tinder. About 10 or 15 swipes (how you show you like or dislike someone), I got a match! That means that she likes me! And WOW, this girl is HOT!!!!! Her age is listed as 95, but looks from her photos about 30 or so. The distance shown is 28 miles, which should be Aspen. Soooo, I sent her a message, and promptly got one back. After a few back and forth messages, I have a date for lunch on Sunday at the Ajax Tavern (base of the gondola).

I showed up a couple of minutes early and snagged a couple of seats at the bar (not easy on a Sunday at 12:30 during ski season). After a fending off seat takers for a half hour and sipping an IPA, I decided she would not show. It would not have surprised me, I have been stood up more times than not, so I left. I had not gone more than a block and got a message that she was "here". Now, my luck with the ladies has not been good and I thought that maybe it was a blessing that she did not show, and I stood there for a few moments deciding whether or not to leave. But, I looked at her picture and decided that I just had to try, after all, I have not had a girlfriend in almost 10 years and had not been on a date in 2 or 3 years at least. After making my way past all the skiers I made it back to the Ajax Tavern, she recognized me immediately. WOW, she looked even better in person. She suggested we go downstairs to and hang out there where it was a little quieter (way more my speed). Downstairs is the Little Nell, not exactly a low end place. We sat and talked for over 2 and half hours, she owns a store in downtown Aspen that sells women's fashion accessories ($$$$$$). She sells some items with fur, so she was quite interested in my coyote hunting and the hides that I sell. We talked about many different things and the time flew by, but she had to get back to the store. Her store is open 7 days a week during the peak season and closed during the off season. We agreed to meet again, perhaps an adventure. She is a city girl and professed to not even own a pair of snow boots, when i mentioned going snowshoeing, asked if I meant the "things that look like rackets". The idea that i would see this girl again had me a bit flustered as I tried to figure out how to enter her phone number in my phone, she asked if I wanted her to do it. Sure, why not, in my state of mind I probably would have gotten it wrong.
When we got up to leave she put on some lip gloss, I think I my tongue might have picked up some lint off the floor!

She gave me a hug and we parted ways on the street. As I walked back to my car, I could not believe what had just happened. I just spent a couple of hours with the most beautiful woman I have ever talked to. I mean, she is HOT, magazine cover model HOT. I think she is more like mid 20's, but oh my god beautiful. And a business owner, speaks 4 languages, and did I mention she was unbelievably attractive. And so easy to talk to, and smart.

I felt like I had just won the lottery. I had not been so attracted to anyone in very many years. I sent her a message when I got home to tell her that I enjoyed meeting her and looked forward to seeing her again.

A day later, my euphoria turned to dismay. She had never responded to my text. Another day and I realized that I must be delusional to think that an absolutely beautiful mid 20's, successful, comes from wealth, educated woman would want to be with a guy like me.

I was delusional.

[Artful]

Oh, but you have a memory - and like fishing, you got to get your pole in the water again.

[geargnasher]

No matter what we'd like to think, just remember that SHE chooses US. We still need to make the first move, and you did. The rest is beyond your control, so go with it.

Gear

[Love Life]

I wouldn't sweat it.

[jrayborn]

I just want to remind you that you should keep trying. There is someone out there (female) that is looking for someone exactly like you. Just like anything else worth doing, you cannot give up! It will be worth it!

Relax, keep trying, and enjoy the ride...

[trapper9260]

It is best to find out now then later.I know I still down that road.But just stick to your values and in time you will find someone .That is what i been telling myself after all these years.I have made a close friend and things did not work yet because thing was out of our own control.

[Handloader109]

There are Way more ladies looking for the right guy. Keep trying, I personally know a half dozen women that have been raked over the coals by trash guys that are so gunshy. They want to meet the right guy, and he is probably out there, but it is hard both ways. Once bitten it is hard to trust. Keep trying.

[freebullet]

You messed up with the text when you got home. In fact I would have not contacted her for a week. By day 4's end if you haven't heard from her you'd know you have your work cut out to get her interest. Women are not attracted to guys fawning for them, and most times respond better to men who show they don't need them. They like the challenge.

She sent you clues the entire time with her body language and actions, it is critical to learn how to properly read and interpret what women tell you without saying a word. The information is out there and free for the searching. Ever felt like a woman expected you to read her mind? Sometimes you can, if you read up and practice. Having that ability will come off as strength/confidence to women, most like confident men.

All may not be lost. Give it a week and a half or 2 weeks. Then you could go down to her shop because you were nearby and wanted to say hello. Don't mention the unreplied to text. Don't send texts until you have an actual relationship. Only reply with short answers if she texts you. She may or may not go out with you again at this point but wouldn't you feel better if you tried? I would rather be outright rejected than wonder what could have been.

A quick way to get her or anyone else's number in your phone is have them call you. Then when you get home you can learn to store it without fumbling with it or having her do it for you.

Keep planting seeds. If you want a women you'll need to talk to lots of them. You'll make friends in the process. Having women as friends will attract other women to you. Don't just give up, we are all pulling for you.

[Ballistics in Scotland]

There are women who have a good meal every Sunday this way. There are mobile phones which die and kill what might be her only note of your number. We can't know the reason. But Wikipedia says Aspen has 6658 people, and even with the skiing trade there can't be that many shops of the kind you describe. Even fewer will be open on Sundays. So that would be a good day to phone and ask if ______ is there. If someone is who turns out not to be the _______ you are looking for, it isn't likely to make her suspicious of your claim to be looking for someone you've lost contact details for. Even if she is, it can't be very suspicious, and she can't crawl through the wires and do anything to you.

Suppose she is just a vanished freeloader, that isn't all negative. You didn't clam up, you knew how to talk about things, you didn't see her eyes glaze over with boredom, and it bodes well for the time it is all real.

The week I started using the internet, in 1999, I got a message from a very beautiful Russian lady. She was loving, intelligent, possessed of all the domestic virtues and some others, and she was just finishing her PhD in thermodynamics. It must have been true, for she was very honest too. I wrote back in a spirit of scientific inquiry, saying that the hardest thing for the amateur to understand in thermodynamics is the bulk modulus of elasticity... I never got a reply, but it stands to reason a woman like that must be very much in demand.

[runfiverun]

look.
just stop by her store, look at a few things and ask her out again.
something super simple like,,, hey I was passing by and thought about you,, you wanna grab some lunch?,,, no your busy? how bout dinner later?
right there final answer.
she may hate the electronic thing too.

[Love Life]

I have it on the highest authority that max numbers and lowered standards will exponentially increase your amount of dates.

[winchester85]

I will give it a while. Maybe check in with her at some later date, or maybe not.

I was never very good at the games, it just never made sense to me that if you were attracted to someone that you are not supposed to let them know, or pretend you are not interested, or the wait for them to contact you, or you have to wait at least 'X' days before responding.

[Fergie]

I will give it a while. Maybe check in with her at some later date, or maybe not.

I was never very good at the games, it just never made sense to me that if you were attracted to someone that you are not supposed to let them know, or pretend you are not interested, or the wait for them to contact you, or you have to wait at least 'X' days before responding.

I'm the same way.

Before she was my wife, I just knew she was a good looking red-headed Irish girl. When I got the chance to talk to her, I about fell over myself. Figured out she was a good person, and smart, and made sure she knew I felt that way. No beating around the bush or games kind of ****. Come to find out she is practical too and had no time for indirect, nuanced passes.

I told her several month in to dating her that I planned to marry her when the time was right. About a year and half later we tied the knot.

[Epd230]

I had a similar experience. I had an awesome first date with the most beautiful woman that I had ever seen. The night ended and I made sure that she had my phone number when we parted. (pre-cell phone days) She promised to call me the next day.

After about one week, I was having many of the same thoughts that you described. Why do I think that I deserve a creature this divine? Why would she even look at me? etc....

I stopped by her work after a week because I had to know for sure. Turns out, she lost the paper with my phone number.

We have been together for 20 years now and have two wonderful children and a great life.

Stop by her work and ask her to coffee or lunch. Don't walk away wondering.

[freebullet]

You don't have to play any games or wait a set time. Think about it more like a dance, you need to be familiar with and good at the moves or you'll send her away with sore feet.

[KYCaster]

Don't give up, there's hope for us yet..........

132079

This is just the index. The book is in the warehouse.

Jerry

[winchester85]

In April I am building a house about 4 blocks from her store, even on the same street. Maybe I will "bump" into her. Her store is closed during the off season though, that is mid April through end of May.

[freebullet]

I wouldn't wait that long.

[dragon813gt]

Most people use Tinder to "hookup". The ladies say that's not what they want but my single friends have proven otherwise. And I mean proven over and over. A lot of the younger girls are looking for older sugar daddies. I'm not trying to be cynical but that's how the app works.

[blackthorn]

Young girl looking for "Sugar Daddy" = hooker!

[JonB_in_Glencoe]

I will give it a while. Maybe check in with her at some later date, or maybe not.

I was never very good at the games, it just never made sense to me that if you were attracted to someone that you are not supposed to let them know, or pretend you are not interested, or the wait for them to contact you, or you have to wait at least 'X' days before responding.

A single woman (or a married one) playing games is only trouble, no matter how good looking she is. I'm not sure if she is the type to wear warpaint, as you didn't mention it, but I've found the ones that wear the most warpaint are the ones that are the most trouble.
Good Luck,
signed, a bachelor about the same age as you.

[Deadpool]

A single woman (or a married one) playing games is only trouble

I'll vouch for that. It doesn't matter if she's hot or even a friggen unicorn. Playing games means she's interested in attention from anyone. Warpaint indicates low self-esteem, which could also tie into attention from anyone. The lipgloss could have been for you, but more than likely to have fresh-looking lips for attention seeking.

If you want one of those attention-seeking low self-esteemers, you have to play their game. And that means treating them like dirt. And be bad-*** about it. They might even want to get slapped around a little, which gets weird..

I've met a bunch of girls (seems like it's the new trend I guess) who play hard-to-get but want you to "just go for it." Not rape, but basically rape. Twisted logic. They learn it in school and from MTV.

My girlfriend was being a B one day; I was tired of it, so I grabbed her by the jaw and back of the head and roughly kissed her; she got off on that. Women are strange these days.

[freebullet]

Warpaint...lol.

We always called it cake face.

[Deadpool]

Warpaint...lol.

We always called it cake face.

Either way, she's lying to you. If she's skinny, the warpaint will make her look like all the hot girls. They're only really hot if they don't feel like they need makeup and have a good attitude.

[dragon813gt]

I've met a bunch of girls (seems like it's the new trend I guess) who play hard-to-get but want you to "just go for it." Not rape, but basically rape.

This was a very odd experience the first time it happened to me. I was questioned the next day why I didn't go for it because that's what she wanted. To say it's a blurry line would be a huge understatement. There is some damage done to the women that like this type of thing. I don't find it coincidental that this particular one was a red head.

[montana_charlie]

The idea that i would see this girl again had me a bit flustered as I tried to figure out how to enter her phone number in my phone, she asked if I wanted her to do it. Sure, why not, in my state of mind I probably would have gotten it wrong.
So, did she put her phone number in your phone ... or send your bank account number and password to her email address?

[waksupi]

If she is a seasonal business owner, she may be very busy. Contact her, and make some plans for when she closes the shop in April.

More important, check to see if she has an Adam's apple. May be a hot cross dresser!

[BruceB]

For a humorous look at dating, go to youtube and search for "Ray Jessel". he's 84, and his song is a riot.

[Love Life]

There is always Craigslist...

[jmort]

This thread is a train wreck. You all are funny. Cast Boolits does awkward dating.

[shoot-n-lead]

This thread is a train wreck. You all are funny. Cast Boolits does awkward dating.

X 2

You got that, right.

[winchester85]

If she is a cross dresser, then I might be gay!

She did not have much makeup on at all. I do not think she is a low self esteem girl either. To own and operate a store on the Hyman Avenue Mall for 5 years either means that she is pretty good at it, or has deep pockets funding her. I would bet the rent on her space is several thousand $ per month. When she spoke of her business, she seemed very in touch and competent. We spoke of the current economic conditions, and the current weather conditions and how that was affecting business.

She could be looking for a sugar daddy, but I think she comes from money. To open a store in the down town area with the type of merchandise she sell, probably requires an initial investment of several hundred thousand to maybe as much as a million $. I doubt from the pictures I have on tinder that she thought/ thinks I have money. One of my pictures is me with face paint on, no shirt, with a record book bull elk head and entire hide on my back, the look on my face would scare many.

Maybe she was looking to hook up, but I did not get that feel ( but i have missed it in the past). When we set the date, I got the idea that she had limited time to meet. Her store is open 10:am to 6:pm seven days a week during ski season, She has 3 full time employees. Besides, a woman that looks like that could pick up ANY guy, ANY day, ANY where, that also has a big fat wallet.

I looked her up and found that she is the real deal, everything she told me about herself and her business checks out. But girls are girls, especially ones in their 20's!

[rking22]

" hot crazy matrix"

You may have found one in the lower right area of the graph :)

[winchester85]

I do appreciate the comments. I was pretty bummed out the other day. When you get used to the same routine and think that you really like your life, and then you realize what you are missing, it kind of sucks!

At this point it was a fun couple of hours!

[Ballistics in Scotland]

Take a look back at the thread and what you have said in it. We can't know for sure if she was the kind of woman you thought. Bu if she was, you went a whole lot more the right way about getting along with her than lots of people would.

[Deadpool]

" hot crazy matrix"

You may have found one in the lower right area of the graph :)

She sounds like a unicorn. Too good to be true. She must be totally crazy. Or was in a rush to get to her 5-way gang bang with local thugs.

[winchester85]

I had typed a response after some thought. Then I hit the back button and lost it. It is never as good the second time.



In my estimation, she did not mis-represent herself, everything she said that I can verify is true. In the conversation that I had with her, she suggested we get together when it gets "a little brighter out", which I thought was reference to the recent several days of snow. While I have been b.s.ed in the past, I did not get the feeling that she was wasting my time. She seemed genuine in her questions and interests. We talked for two and a half hours, it was never awkward. When we parted ways I thought about walking her to her destination but did not want to seem obsessed or needy.

She might just be a girl, they rarely seem to know what they want!

[WILCO]

Well, I read this far..................

[winchester85]

Well, an update.

The other day I was having problems with my phone, I got it working again and did not think much of it. Then a day later, I had the thought that maybe the texts that I had sent her were never received. So, I sent her a message through Tinder last night. It appears that she never got my texts. She replied that she too had a good time when we met, and that I opened her eyes to many things around here that she has not experienced. Unfortunately, during the last week she went on a date with an old friend and thinks that they have "hit it off".

I thanked her for responding to me and that if she ever wanted to go on an adventure, that she knows how to reach me.

I can't think anything other than that she is the real deal.

[montana_charlie]

Yeah, I used to appreciate it when a girl who knew she was out of my league would find a way to let me down easy ...

[winchester85]

gee, thanks.

[Rufus Krile]

At least she wasn't the Nigerian Princess wanting to make you rich....

[Alvarez Kelly]

Man! I was rooting for you too.

You never know. You might hear from her again in six months... And chances are you will have already found a nice woman and will have to tell her she missed her chance... I've seen it happen many times.

Keep meeting people. It will happen

[fatnhappy]

More important, check to see if she has an Adam's apple. May be a hot cross dresser!

Is this the voice of experience?

[Deadpool]

Is this the voice of experience?

My experience tells me cross-dressers are, defacto, not hot. I'd have to be very drunk to not notice. I only "like" very feminine women, anyway.

[Deadpool]

with an old friend

Ouch. That's BS.

[10x]

Considering my wife was a "wrong number" - I was trying to find another girl from a University physics class - and it has lasted over 46 years.

Sometimes it works.....

[Ballistics in Scotland]

Well, an update.

The other day I was having problems with my phone, I got it working again and did not think much of it. Then a day later, I had the thought that maybe the texts that I had sent her were never received. So, I sent her a message through Tinder last night. It appears that she never got my texts. She replied that she too had a good time when we met, and that I opened her eyes to many things around here that she has not experienced. Unfortunately, during the last week she went on a date with an old friend and thinks that they have "hit it off".

I thanked her for responding to me and that if she ever wanted to go on an adventure, that she knows how to reach me.

I can't think anything other than that she is the real deal.

You did things exactly right, and avoided any cynical or smartass reply. Not all dates work out, even dates with someone else, and you might hear from her again. OK, maybe she just wanted to enliven one Sunday, or maybe she put a lot of thinking into whether she ought to get involved, and decided against. She is entitled to do that, just like anybody else. But there is no benefit in trying to work off past grudges against women on her, or letting others persuade you into working off their grudges by proxy.

A pretty good principle is to convince yourself that if you let yourself fall into a cynical view of female motivation, they can see it. Very often they can.

[10x]

My experience tells me cross-dressers are, defacto, not hot. I'd have to be very drunk to not notice. I only "like" very feminine women, anyway.

I fondly recall one fellow who went to a students dance at U in 1970. He picked up a gorgeous lady at the dance and had a great time, dancing, joking laughing, and finally brought her up to his room in mens residence. This was the first year that women other than mothers or sisters were allowed in past the lounge (lobby and common room) and a fellow and girl could retire to a dorm room for privacy. There was a 2 hour window every day between 7 and 9 pm for this to happen. Sometimes a lady would stay later and leave discretely - no one tattled.
Those of us who were less than attractive to women had already left the dance and were watching television while "Bob" and his new lady friend walked through on the way to his room.
The lady was remarkably beautiful and we were all envious of "Bob".
In less than ten minutes we heard "bob" scream and seconds later the lady ran through the lounge and down the stairs (Sixth floor of a ten story high rise residence).
We rushed to see if bob was ok and he was sitting on his bed, pants off, crying and mumbling.
Apparently "Bob", while necking, had slide a hand into home base and discovered equipment of an unexpected gender.

In defense of Bob, every one of us would have made that mistake until we figured out "BoB was mumbling "she's a guy...." over and over
No one laughed at the time.

[dilly]

My girlfriend was being a B one day; I was tired of it, so I grabbed her by the jaw and back of the head and roughly kissed her; she got off on that. Women are strange these days.

Sounds like something I've seen in every John Wayne movie ever.

[Deadpool]

Sounds like something I've seen in every John Wayne movie ever.

Then I told her to shut up and make me a sandwich. And she did. Weird.