BrassMagnet
11-30-2014, 11:24 PM
Well, I was trying not to confess, but it slipped out when Jaysouth called George a pervert. Here is what I wrote then so you don't have to go searching around. It kind of makes me think George responds a lot better to kindness than force. So here it is:
George came by western Colorado a while back. I have been really quiet about what happened. I was so embarrassed I didn't want anyone to know.
I have tried to get the best of George on a number of occasions and I always come out second best. I have tried traps. He's too smart to fall for them. I tried to knock him down and shake them out of him. My surveillance system gave me the drop on him, but he was so tough I was the one left bruised and battered. Well, if you keep trying the same thing and expecting a different outcome, they call that the definition of crazy.
So I decided to try something different. My surveillance system saw him in plenty of time. I ran a cup of Joe out of my Keurig coffee maker and I poured a healthy slug of sour mash whiskey in it. I put some pastries on a plate next to it and I took a nap!
I felt pretty good when I woke up without any bruises or contusions. I felt even better when I went out to the mould shed and found Lyman 310 dies and antique .32 S&W ammo scattered all over the mould shed floor.
Maybe a coffee pot is too new fangled for him. Have you tried leaving a hot cup out for him every night? Maybe cookies or pastries? Maybe it was the sour mash. The dies and ammo really looked more like he spilled them than placed them neatly. The dies weren't all nice and complete sets, so maybe next time I will add even more sour mash!
I'm pretty sure he came back today.
I had a little surgery about two and a half weeks ago and I am really not feeling all that well. It is still pretty easy to start bleeding again. They say walking is good for me, but walking the dog or just standing up seems to cause more bleeding. So I'm pretty wimpy right now.
I was all worn out just watching Swapping & Selling so I decided to take a nap. One of my little dogs started barking and I was just too tired to check out the security system. I just rolled over.
I finally got up a few hours later and looked around. I had a mail package on the front porch. Sunday mail delivery? Who would ever suspect that? They must have delivered it to a neighbor and that is what the dog was barking about. I checked the tracking number to see when they supposedly delivered it. Sunday afternoon! Wow! That sure is cool!
I walked out into the kitchen and I noticed my sour mash bottle is empty. Now that makes me a little irrigated. You can translate that as pissed off! I went out to the mould shed and I found 310 tools and dies laid out on my work bench. Now I'm getting more irrigated because I finished sorting them out and putting them away yesterday. I wanted to know which ones were played with and who the culprit was! 358 Winchester dies. I didn't have any 358 Winchester dies. Three 310 tools, one small and two large. When I went to put them away, all of mine were in their box. Yes, it is a damn big box and full to the top. I recounted them to prove they were all still there. He even left some oddball dies. Maybe they belong to the others to make more sets? Woohoo! More 310 tools.
Now I think I know who the culprit is.
George! He wanted me to know he didn't spill the last batch while drunk and disorderly. He wanted me to have them! He even put his coffee cup in the dishwasher. He likes my Navy cup with all the gold trim! He ate my cookies, too!
I think I am going to keep sour mash and cookies in the house at all times!
George came by western Colorado a while back. I have been really quiet about what happened. I was so embarrassed I didn't want anyone to know.
I have tried to get the best of George on a number of occasions and I always come out second best. I have tried traps. He's too smart to fall for them. I tried to knock him down and shake them out of him. My surveillance system gave me the drop on him, but he was so tough I was the one left bruised and battered. Well, if you keep trying the same thing and expecting a different outcome, they call that the definition of crazy.
So I decided to try something different. My surveillance system saw him in plenty of time. I ran a cup of Joe out of my Keurig coffee maker and I poured a healthy slug of sour mash whiskey in it. I put some pastries on a plate next to it and I took a nap!
I felt pretty good when I woke up without any bruises or contusions. I felt even better when I went out to the mould shed and found Lyman 310 dies and antique .32 S&W ammo scattered all over the mould shed floor.
Maybe a coffee pot is too new fangled for him. Have you tried leaving a hot cup out for him every night? Maybe cookies or pastries? Maybe it was the sour mash. The dies and ammo really looked more like he spilled them than placed them neatly. The dies weren't all nice and complete sets, so maybe next time I will add even more sour mash!
I'm pretty sure he came back today.
I had a little surgery about two and a half weeks ago and I am really not feeling all that well. It is still pretty easy to start bleeding again. They say walking is good for me, but walking the dog or just standing up seems to cause more bleeding. So I'm pretty wimpy right now.
I was all worn out just watching Swapping & Selling so I decided to take a nap. One of my little dogs started barking and I was just too tired to check out the security system. I just rolled over.
I finally got up a few hours later and looked around. I had a mail package on the front porch. Sunday mail delivery? Who would ever suspect that? They must have delivered it to a neighbor and that is what the dog was barking about. I checked the tracking number to see when they supposedly delivered it. Sunday afternoon! Wow! That sure is cool!
I walked out into the kitchen and I noticed my sour mash bottle is empty. Now that makes me a little irrigated. You can translate that as pissed off! I went out to the mould shed and I found 310 tools and dies laid out on my work bench. Now I'm getting more irrigated because I finished sorting them out and putting them away yesterday. I wanted to know which ones were played with and who the culprit was! 358 Winchester dies. I didn't have any 358 Winchester dies. Three 310 tools, one small and two large. When I went to put them away, all of mine were in their box. Yes, it is a damn big box and full to the top. I recounted them to prove they were all still there. He even left some oddball dies. Maybe they belong to the others to make more sets? Woohoo! More 310 tools.
Now I think I know who the culprit is.
George! He wanted me to know he didn't spill the last batch while drunk and disorderly. He wanted me to have them! He even put his coffee cup in the dishwasher. He likes my Navy cup with all the gold trim! He ate my cookies, too!
I think I am going to keep sour mash and cookies in the house at all times!