omgb
08-23-2007, 06:32 PM
Guys and gals, my father passed rather suddenly Wednesday. I wrote this for the folks at my school in part to explain why I wouldn't be there today and in part so they would know what my father meant to me. In this day, lots of people have crappy relationships with their folks. Respect seems to be the missing link. I'm 51 and still said "yes sir" and " no sir" to my dad. Not because I was afraid of him, quite the contrary, it was because I respected him, both as a man and a father. Any way, here is the account of his passing.
To my friends:
My father died very peacefully, holding my hand, surrounded by my sister Paula, my mother and his grandson Jared (my sister Carla's oldest) Jared's dad died when he was very young so my father was as much a father to him as he was to me.
My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer at the start of summer school this year. Later, it was discovered that he had two different types of cancer at two different locations in his intestines. He had begun radiation and chemo three weeks ago but suffered a set back last week when his small intestine twisted shut. He was rushed to PSJ (Providence St. Joseph Medical Center)Thursday and was operated on Saturday AM. He was off the ventilator Monday and we had a very long talk. Unfortunately, he had to be placed back on the ventilator Tues afternoon. It was also then that the labs came back positive for a new (to him) and highly aggressive type of stomach cancer. This was deemed inoperable and was already occluding his upper GI. Sepsis had set in last week and was now affecting his kidneys to the point that between Monday and Wednesday he went into renal failure. My sisters, my mother and I agreed that we would move toward what the hospital calls "comfort care" after lunch yesterday. This meant that he would be taken off the drugs that had been artificially boosting his blood pressure. In addition, he would be placed on a morphine drip and disconnected from the ventilator. This was all done by 2:15 yesterday. Over the course of the next few minutes, dad was in and out of wakefulness. He could see us and recognize us but he could not speak. As his blood oxygen decreased he gradually drifted off and his breathing became slower and shallower. By 3:00 PM he was gone.
Earlier in the AM I had read to him the 8th chapter of Romans and he had been awake off and on throughout the reading. At one point he squeezed my hand and looked at me. His only sibling, his sister, had called and we put the phone up to his ear. I'm not sure whether or not he heard her. My sister Paula, who is also an RN in that ICU, says he could so I'm taking her word for it. Any way, all of us had gotten a chance to say good by between Monday and Wednesday. From my conversations with him on Monday I know that he was ready to go. He was asking me alot about his father's faith (much of Dad's memory was erased 5 years ago during that bout with encephalitis) and I think he was looking forward to seeing him again. In any case, this was a good death for a good man. I can only hope that God will let me go in a similar way.
The people at St. Joseph's were outstanding. His nursing care was simply perfect. In the end, I was given as much time as I needed just to sit with him and reflect. I couldn't have asked for more.
For the record, My dad was born on March 4th 1931 in Culver City . He served in the USAF during the Korean War and after his discharge, attended Glendale Community College and Cal State LA where he majored in engineering. He used this degree to start a life-long career in the computer industry where he worked for Disney, Adventist Medical Systems, Hughs Acft and Technicolor. He was married to my mom in June of 1955. I was born in May of 1956, my sister Carla came along in December of 1957, my sister Aleece in Sep of 59 and my sister Paula in July of 1967. We all have given him grandchildren, 11 in total. In addition, he has one great grandson who was born to my daughter in May of 2006.
He was a life-long member of First Lutheran church and had at various times served as a Deacon, Elder and Board of Education member (FLC has an elementary school).
Any way, that's the story behind dad. I thought I'd include it so that people could get a better picture of what has happened. As I said earlier, feel free to share it.
To my friends:
My father died very peacefully, holding my hand, surrounded by my sister Paula, my mother and his grandson Jared (my sister Carla's oldest) Jared's dad died when he was very young so my father was as much a father to him as he was to me.
My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer at the start of summer school this year. Later, it was discovered that he had two different types of cancer at two different locations in his intestines. He had begun radiation and chemo three weeks ago but suffered a set back last week when his small intestine twisted shut. He was rushed to PSJ (Providence St. Joseph Medical Center)Thursday and was operated on Saturday AM. He was off the ventilator Monday and we had a very long talk. Unfortunately, he had to be placed back on the ventilator Tues afternoon. It was also then that the labs came back positive for a new (to him) and highly aggressive type of stomach cancer. This was deemed inoperable and was already occluding his upper GI. Sepsis had set in last week and was now affecting his kidneys to the point that between Monday and Wednesday he went into renal failure. My sisters, my mother and I agreed that we would move toward what the hospital calls "comfort care" after lunch yesterday. This meant that he would be taken off the drugs that had been artificially boosting his blood pressure. In addition, he would be placed on a morphine drip and disconnected from the ventilator. This was all done by 2:15 yesterday. Over the course of the next few minutes, dad was in and out of wakefulness. He could see us and recognize us but he could not speak. As his blood oxygen decreased he gradually drifted off and his breathing became slower and shallower. By 3:00 PM he was gone.
Earlier in the AM I had read to him the 8th chapter of Romans and he had been awake off and on throughout the reading. At one point he squeezed my hand and looked at me. His only sibling, his sister, had called and we put the phone up to his ear. I'm not sure whether or not he heard her. My sister Paula, who is also an RN in that ICU, says he could so I'm taking her word for it. Any way, all of us had gotten a chance to say good by between Monday and Wednesday. From my conversations with him on Monday I know that he was ready to go. He was asking me alot about his father's faith (much of Dad's memory was erased 5 years ago during that bout with encephalitis) and I think he was looking forward to seeing him again. In any case, this was a good death for a good man. I can only hope that God will let me go in a similar way.
The people at St. Joseph's were outstanding. His nursing care was simply perfect. In the end, I was given as much time as I needed just to sit with him and reflect. I couldn't have asked for more.
For the record, My dad was born on March 4th 1931 in Culver City . He served in the USAF during the Korean War and after his discharge, attended Glendale Community College and Cal State LA where he majored in engineering. He used this degree to start a life-long career in the computer industry where he worked for Disney, Adventist Medical Systems, Hughs Acft and Technicolor. He was married to my mom in June of 1955. I was born in May of 1956, my sister Carla came along in December of 1957, my sister Aleece in Sep of 59 and my sister Paula in July of 1967. We all have given him grandchildren, 11 in total. In addition, he has one great grandson who was born to my daughter in May of 2006.
He was a life-long member of First Lutheran church and had at various times served as a Deacon, Elder and Board of Education member (FLC has an elementary school).
Any way, that's the story behind dad. I thought I'd include it so that people could get a better picture of what has happened. As I said earlier, feel free to share it.