Since it seems like he listens to grandma, I would have her sit him down and find out what the burr is under his saddle. For whatever reason, the boy doesn’t appreciate the good things he has. Don’t give up and don’t get mad.
Since it seems like he listens to grandma, I would have her sit him down and find out what the burr is under his saddle. For whatever reason, the boy doesn’t appreciate the good things he has. Don’t give up and don’t get mad.
I believe I would buy him a gift certificate to one of the better mail order supply shops. Midways, grafs, Mid South, titan or such. This way he can pick what he wants and make the informed decisson.
As to attitude lead by example this sometimes takes time but most usually come around. Be there when he asks questions and needs advice, don't be judgemental of him. Always remember most go thru several stages with older people. They are the best, their okay, Older people don't know anything or have forgotten it, and They are smarter than I thought. Give him some support and time to come around
Manuels can give him knowledge and bolster his ability to use the equipment when the time comes. He is under immense pressure at school from the libs and at a time he is trying desperately to fit in, gun related subjects are met only with contempt.
As long as he knows that you are willing to help, the next move is up to him. Just be understanding and bide your time, after all not all shooters are reloaders and not all reloaders are casters. When the time cimes only he can make those decissions.
Information not shared. is wasted.
DonMountain,
If/when this resolves itself hope you can share the outcome
A lotta folks trying their best to help out
NRA Life
USPSA L1314
SASS Life 48747
RVN/Cambodia War Games, 2nd Place
I thank all of you a lot for your collective wisdom you have given me so far. This whole process so far, with him going out and purchasing a reloading press with the intention of coming home and starting to reload something, was just kind of a blow to me psycologically. Since I have a reloading room all set up with several reloading presses, 30 or 40 die sets, a good reloading scale (RCBS 10-10), and all of the other stuff in multiples required to reload and trim and set primers and measure powder and measure this and that. And I would gladly loan him anything he needs or if he wants to use my whole room and presses as they are mounted with all the dies correctly adjusted already. So, my conclusion is that I need to open a discussion with him about this possibility, with my wife sitting in to listen and "control" the situation.
Does He know he is welcome in your reloading room? I'd be very chary of going there unless I had a specific invitation unless I grew up loading in that room.
Wayne the Shrink
There is no 'right' that requires me to work for you or you to work for me!
Jim B is correct; I would get him the reloading manual and hold off giving it to him 'til the day after Christmas....to see the intent of his purchasing the press. He may be offering an olive branch, he may not.
For what ever reason he won't talk to you; that is outside of the hobby and you will have to work on that. Maybe invite him to your reloading session... if he comes let him talk, don't judge or feel that you must justify yourself. To do so will just cause him to clam up. He feels he has legitimate reasons for feeling the way he does which is manifested in his actions. You feel you have legitimate reasons for feeling the way you do. Somewhere between what you both perceive is the problem, is the problem to be worked on.
Ask me how I know, I am the black sheep of my family; like me, if your grandson is that old, and you love your family, you don't have the luxury of time to prolong this.
FWIW: I like to have my own equipment. Something about owning it vs. borrowing someone else's means I have access to it anytime I wish, leave it configured as I want and don't have to ask permission.
Will I use other's stuff? sure but I still enjoy the ownership factor
NRA Life
USPSA L1314
SASS Life 48747
RVN/Cambodia War Games, 2nd Place
The grandchild is very much this way. Although he doesn't seem to have a problem going into the shop and "borrowing" tools. But he likes to leave them outside in the back of his truck instead of putting them back away. My wife came up with another request after I used a couple of the threads on here to make up a "Required Reloading Equipment List" to comfortably reload cartridges. She was surprised at the length of the list and asked me to add prices for each of these items so she can pick a few out. I have already ordered the Lyman Reloading Manual #50 for her to give to him. But my problem is, I like to own well made and functional reloading equipment. But the reloading press that he purchased appears like he just wants the cheapest available. I would prefer to wait for a quality used piece off of one of the auction sites rather than go to the local, overpriced reloading shop and purchase the cheapest he has available.
Yes, but then you are experienced and know from experience the difference between quality and poor quality. Let him use his cheap stuff for a while and then invite him in to use your quality equipment so he can gain your experience.
Wayne the Shrink
There is no 'right' that requires me to work for you or you to work for me!
He has to be a shooter before he is a reloader. If you have a shooting range nearby, get him a yearly membership. Maybe he'll take out his fustrations there and be in a more shooting supportive climate. Especially after being in class all week. He will be exposed to a different class of people, many his age. May help 'crack' his shell.
Way too much speculation on what makes the kid 'tick' and what pressures he's dealing with.
You won't know until you sit one on one with him and somehow 'disarm his attitude' and start communicating first.
To let him fool around trying to figure it out on his own and then invite him to use good equipment may sound good on paper but it's the absolute wrong approach...this craft isn't to be taken lightly where one can make big mistakes without paying big penalties.
Communication without a female moderator is the first order of the day...might take 6 weeks but your going to have to earn that kids trust first, after that you'll be friends and that'll change everything.
a m e r i c a n p r a v d a
Be a Patriot . . . expose their lies!
“In a time of deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.” G. Orwell
If you can't talk to him about reloading just get him a book and let him figger it out. I'd recommend a copy of The ABCs of Reloading. It will show him how to reload and what equipment he needs. I'd keep my distance but be there if he approaches you for help, info, etc. From your description, he needs to choose his own equipment and make his own mistakes. Any info suggestions from you that don't fit his idea of reloading or go wrong (?) he'll blame on you...
Last edited by mdi; 12-12-2017 at 06:29 PM.
My Anchor is holding fast!
Get some reloading videos. Everyone likes to watch TV and it can stimulate conversation that might lead to a trip to the reloading room to demonstrate. If the lesson is not coming from you it might make a difference and start things off on a good note.
,,, stupidity comes to some people very easily. 8/22/2017 Pat Lengyel (my wife) in a discussion about Liberals.
I was another that had the privilege of spending time with my Grandfathers as a youngster, up to the age of about 16. They both taught me skills that I still use. I am forever grateful for the experience.
We had a young man here a few years ago that was quick to explain how his generation didn't need printed books. They had digital devices (just like every last one of us here) and got their information from the Internet. As I recall he didn't stick around very long because nobody would support his opinions. Your grandson made me think of him. If your wife is able to get some insight into his attitude issues, maybe the greatest gift to your grandson would be the experience of shooting and reloading alongside you. What better way to instill your values and attention to detail when it matters?
Good luck with him!
David
Sometimes life taps you on the shoulder and reminds you it's a one way street. Jim Morris
Ask him if he wants to move out and work for his room and board while attending 4 years of college. He probably hates being dependent on you and the lack of control he has.
If he can't get a grip you may have to introduce him to life on his own.
EDG
I would get him a manual, some brass, primers and a powder that can fill the complete case without over-charging. Maybe allowing him to use your dies and scale. But a good book about manners and how to behave as an adult may be a better long term investment
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Loading manual would be the best gift.
A person should know what they are doing before they virtue into something dangerous.
Political correctness is a national suicide pact.
I am a sovereign individual, accountable
only to God and my own conscience.
Ok, we received the Lyman #50 Loading Manual for the grandson, and I also made him two loading blocks to fit both his 243/30-06 cases and his 7.62x54R cases. That I could easily do on the Shopsmith since I already had the bits to bore flat bottomed holes and the setup spacers to put all 50 holes all lined up easily. So, with a little bit of saw work. And some router table work. And some sanding work. They are all done and included in his Christmas package. We decided not to purchase any other reloading equipment for him since he always wants to do it "his way". So we will let him. Like his work on the motorcycle he bought recently, I hope his favorite reloading tools don't follow his pattern using a pair of Vice-Grips, Ball Peen Hammer, and a Cold Chisel to do everything.
BP | Bronze Point | IMR | Improved Military Rifle | PTD | Pointed |
BR | Bench Rest | M | Magnum | RN | Round Nose |
BT | Boat Tail | PL | Power-Lokt | SP | Soft Point |
C | Compressed Charge | PR | Primer | SPCL | Soft Point "Core-Lokt" |
HP | Hollow Point | PSPCL | Pointed Soft Point "Core Lokt" | C.O.L. | Cartridge Overall Length |
PSP | Pointed Soft Point | Spz | Spitzer Point | SBT | Spitzer Boat Tail |
LRN | Lead Round Nose | LWC | Lead Wad Cutter | LSWC | Lead Semi Wad Cutter |
GC | Gas Check |