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Thread: Kids,Addicts,Lies,and Momma

  1. #21
    Boolit Grand Master

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    My oldest has the affliction also. Drugs alclhol wrong crowd. Its been a trial for me ( single parent wife was killed in 2002). Shes been to rehab a couple times and leaves when she wants. 28 years old so She can make decisions herself. She has ODed once, We went into town got her and got her admitted to a hospitals program away from the crowd in an a joining county. She sighned herself out after 2 weeks. Ive had to let her go, I cant Loan her money as I don't know where its going or what for, I cant bring her her as I cant trust her or have her "friends" here. SHes lost her drivers license for Insurance violations. and accidents. Last was driving a stolen car. She claims she didn't steal it but was told it was a friends car.
    What ever you do don't loan give money, it just enables them to continue. Be tough and hard right now. Until He decides He needs help and support its not going to get better. I found even covering bills with a check made to Doctor or company, She just held her money back for the drugs alchlol, while I covered the neccities.
    This is very hard to go through and can is devastating to a family. He cant go on like he is and wont change until he decides to. Unfourtently it probably wont be until he hits bottom and has no choice left.

  2. #22
    Boolit Master
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    I have watched children drain the parents dry with no remorse. One I know of took everything and demanded more. I don't know if it was blown on drugs or gambling or what. A lifetime of work and saving gone....

    This is only my advice....you need to do what you think is right but after you give it all you won't have anything left.... and the kid will mad at you because you don't have more to 'give'.

  3. #23
    Boolit Master
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    All have given sound advice, thank you. You're prayers have been heard and I believe are being answered. Momma got up this morning like a changed person and its even taking about getting help for some of her other issues to get some mental stability back. Unfortunately I think bottom is further down for our son. Praise God! Praise God!

  4. #24
    Boolit Grand Master GhostHawk's Avatar
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    Still praying for all 3 of you thundarstick.

    Prayer works.

    At 68 my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer, left lobe, size of a grapefruit.
    They tried him on a new program, chemo before surgery, try to shrink it some. Save more of the lung.

    Day 2 of the Chemo dad was failing fast.
    But I had a big support group from around the world. Several very religious people, and a good friend with 5 little kids. Yeah, Big guy can't refuse them much either.

    A day later dad turned the corner, 2 weeks later they did surgery. He survived until he was 93.

    And I saw, I know it was the prayer that did it. I'll keep praying. Keep your spirits up.
    Take care of Momma.

  5. #25
    Boolit Grand Master Artful's Avatar
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    Praying for your Son to see the light and get help and better, and his mothers emotional and spiritual well being, Strength for your family and yourself.
    je suis charlie

    It is better to live one day as a LION than a dozen days as a Sheep.

    Thomas Jefferson Quotations:
    "The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government."

  6. #26
    Boolit Master
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    I wanted to give an update.

    My wife is following her Drs advice and letting me deal with our son completely. He has said things to her that I'm not sure she is ever going to get past with out help. Keep praying for her to follow through with counseling as she is trying to move forward. My son? We've paid thousands of dollars for his treatment in the past, that he completed. He drifted away from his program and the people who can help despite my encouragement. It's caught up with him again. He's in legal trouble and using, hince all the lies and manipulation. Last I talked to him I told him, I love you, you bought the situation your in and you have to own it. He says he's moving to Colorado so he can do what he wants when he gets out of jail this time. Pray for him to come to real recovery. Thank you again for your prayers.

  7. #27
    In Remembrance / Boolit Grand Master Boaz's Avatar
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    I will continue to pray for you and your family . Thank you for the update .
    No turning back , No turning back !

  8. #28
    Boolit Master 308Jeff's Avatar
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    As someone who has also been affected by this, I feel your pain and understand what you're going through. This is something I would never wish upon anyone. Some of these drugs are the Devil himself personified, I believe.

    You, your family, and your son have my most sincere prayers.

    I am in absolute agreement with GhostHawk. DO NOT bail him out. As bad as it sounds, he's in the very best place he can be right now. I have a coworker who's son struggled and it was his time in jail that finally gave him his rock-bottom and the will to change.

    Good luck, brother.

  9. #29
    Boolit Master
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    You are doing what he needs right now, stay strong and trust the Lord.

  10. #30
    Boolit Grand Master GhostHawk's Avatar
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    If he survives to reach Colorado I would expect it to be the end of him.

    Fact is some people simple can not manage, can't control it.

    I know I was one. I do now, I am that rarity that they say does not exist.
    The alcoholic that can have one drink and walk away. Not have the second. Not for a month. Took a long time to get the monkey off my back. Eventually I realized it was not the alcohol I really wanted.
    It was the social aspects. People to talk to. So maybe I was not a true alcoholic.

    Stand FAST.

    Make him earn anything he gets. And if he slips, backslides, he owes it all back instantly.

    Make it clear, he gets in trouble with the law again, your writing him out of your will. He's out.

    The only way is to stay clean, stay working, stay out of trouble. No alcohol, no drugs, no excuses.
    He made this mess, he has to live in it. The only way out of that is the next time he is released, is to not make another mess.

  11. #31
    Boolit Master
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    I contacted the county clerks office yesterday to get the truth about what is really going on. He's in jail at this time under a $150,000 bond, with the charges he's facing, I'm estimating he's looking at 2-5 years in the state prison system and at least $10,000 in fines. I intend to help him with a few necessities while incarcerated and hope to salvage a few of his belongings that have sentimental value.
    Continue prayers for his mother most of all as she can only see bad in everything. I'm thanking God he's not murdered someone, or has a vehicular homicide charge, or has been killed!

  12. #32
    Boolit Buddy sparkyv's Avatar
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    Prayer sent.

  13. #33
    In Remembrance / Boolit Grand Master Boaz's Avatar
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    Never give up on him , help him when he tries to do right and expect to see results . You control the situation , never enable him . I'm still praying for your family .
    No turning back , No turning back !

  14. #34
    Boolit Master
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    I won't give up, or enable, yet I'm afraid his fate is in the hands of the state for several years to come. I pray for God to give me wisdom, strength, and steadfastness to hear his call in all this.

  15. #35
    In Remembrance / Boolit Grand Master Boaz's Avatar
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    More prayer is needed in this cause . Please pray for intercession , please pray for recovery from a tragic situation . Pray for this family .
    No turning back , No turning back !

  16. #36
    Boolit Grand Master Artful's Avatar
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    Praying for best possible outcome of this battle with Evil both within and without and a judge/court that can show leniency if deserved.
    je suis charlie

    It is better to live one day as a LION than a dozen days as a Sheep.

    Thomas Jefferson Quotations:
    "The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in government."

  17. #37
    Boolit Master Handloader109's Avatar
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    My brother's youngest got into college and went downhill like Lindsey Vaughn....
    university actually threw her out after finding her passed out drunk in a hallway. From there it was hard drugs and alcohol. Three rehabs, (she could have taught the class the last time) all worthless. Ended up wrecking a second car, luckily no one was hurt in either. Law finally put her in jail, spent about 90 days in, got out and stayed clean for a while, met a guy and ended up having a kid. So far 3 years with nothing but a small setback, but it is still knife edge. Only your son can fix his problem, it is cruel, but maybe 2yrs lost in jail will fix him. Going to CO so he CNN do what he wants is a fallacy, but you can't keep him from doing it. Tell him you and his mom love him and will see him if he wants to once he gets out...... And go on with your life.... He's made his decision, you as parents can't change him. Yes it hurts, but it's life... God be with you

  18. #38
    Boolit Master
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    Delete
    Last edited by castalott; 12-18-2017 at 09:28 AM.

  19. #39
    In Remembrance / Boolit Grand Master Boaz's Avatar
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    Many have strong feelings on drugs , I do too . This is a prayer thread to give help and encouragement to a family that is hurting . Lets give encouragement , take the drug war to the pit . Thank you .
    No turning back , No turning back !

  20. #40
    Boolit Master
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    My apologizes to all... Dale

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