Thinking about taking a break

[tomme boy]

Over the last few years this forum has grown by leaps and bounds. I am HAPPY that there is so much knowledge available to drawn from. But I have noticed a trend and others have too. Sometimes people just don't like to hear the truth about a subject. If I am wrong about something I will be the first to admit it. So I try my best to not give bad info or knowledge. But sometimes things you have been told and taught were not correct. Especially old wives tails. There are lots of them in this cast bullet sport. I have had my mind changed a bunch of times on what is what when it comes to cast.

What I guess I am trying to say is the attitude of the forum has changed. We have had so many people join up because of the ammo shortages and the political leadership of the country. It seems that lots of these people have come from other forums that bashing and rudeness is the normal way of getting something across. I am one that is on most of the other gun forums as well. But I don't act like a A**. At least I try not to anyway. Sometimes it is just hard to say on a computer what you really mean. I hope that is all of what I see that is going on.

But I think I am going to sit back and see what happens for a while.

[Artful]

This site is unique and very valuable - but it doesn't require you visit every day, especially in the pit area - And the Main Stream Media doesn't require it either.

Take a break and just observe if you have a question. Enjoy your time away and spend it with the important people in your life. Take care of your Health and sanity.

[Piedmont]

Yeah, stay out of the pit. I wish they would do away with that board or room or whatever it is called. It lowers my opinion of some on here whom I would have a great time talking just guns with. So I don't go there anymore and am happy.

[blackthorn]

I have noticed that some people have a very thin skin! I found this (slightly edited) opinion on the“net” and I was struck by the wisdom it contained and how well it applies to this (and any other) forum. “No flame or disrespect to anyone inparticular, intended or implied, it's just a problem with non-verbal, non-faceto face communication. Humans, like allprimates, are visually attuned mammals, and absent looking into the eyes and,having lost the ability to observe facial/body language, information is lost”. When I post I try very hard to be respectful to others and to at least make allowances for what are sometimes aggravating (to me) opinions/comments. That said, if one feels they need a break they should take it and use the time to regroup.

[Josh Smith]

The Pit?

[JBinMN]

Taking a break can be a good thing.


Although I am new here, I am not a "newbie" to forums where the written word is used. I have run across the same things more than a few times, even on forums where you would be thinking that it was hard to find a "cross" person discussing a topic. Like who could get mad & mean in a forum discussing vegetables & gardening, or in a topic about using tick medicine on a dog & where to apply it??, as examples... There "are" people who are just mean/rude without even realizing it , I think... Doesn't mean they have nothing to offer, it is how they offer what they have. Handing something to someone is usually taken better than chucking it at them. Throwing a baseball to hit someone is different than a pitch or lobbing a ball to an outfielder. Just sometimes hard to tell the difference when writing...

Anyway...Personally, like others here, I also try to be very civil with others when discussing topics that are turning divisive. Sometimes what some folks write, like your quote says in the OP; in a way that the communication is not perceived as it was meant... due to lack of inflection & such. So, even if something is written that you perceive to be a jab, it may only be a person joking with ya, & ya just misinterpreted it, for whatever reason. It does help to know the person a bit better, so you can understand their intentions. Many folks here are strangers to one another & do not have the familiarity to "get" when they are being teased a bit just in fun & not a serious "dig".

That emoticon " pulling your chain" thingee >> << is useful, IMO & I wish more folks used it when needed & more places had one to use...

More than once, a buddy has said something like, "Aww, "F" -you!" jokingly, and I know it was just a response to a tease, where someone else might perceive it as "fightin words", not knowing the basis for the exchange of words between folks who know one another and are joshing back & forth...

So yes, sometimes it is good to just take a break & not let what ya read get ya too worked up. I have done that myself. And not just here....{ I just did it last week. } I have done it even, in an argument with a friend or relative & we are not seeing things eye to eye. If I find myself getting worked up, I try to just get away from it/them & go look at or do something else, like just go work on reloading, or any of the other hobbies I have interest in doing.

The main thing is to try to be civil no matter what, if ya can. If in a "conflict", even on the internet in a discussion forum, I like to try to remember Thos. Jeffersons' words about such things... His quote about it is:

“Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.”

Keeping that in mind helps me just stay cool as I can & not let it get to me too much. And it works...

ETA: I forgot about mentioning "assumptions"... they lead to hassles too, if people assume something & don't have a clear understanding of what the other person is saying they may assume that the person thinks one way, when it is not true, and the person typing thinks another way than the reader perceives it & then the reader makes a general "assumption" about the writer & the content, even though the reader is mistaken...
Hard to tell sometimes.
I often have a hard time "typing" something, that I could easily "say" clearer, & in less words.. Just not sure how to do it... Like this post for example...LOL


Well, anyway, G'luck! in your hiatus & hope to see ya around! I have enjoyed reading a lot of folks posts here, even when I don't always agree. Yours included.. Please don't be a stranger. I think we all have something to share with everyone else, or we would not be in the same forum...

[Skinny]

I would say the most ive noticed (with all forums) is folks tend to let things like respect/truth/values/etc., slide to the negative side when they dont have to face someone.

There is a tendacy to let maturity fall some and do things one wouldnt normally do/say if face to face with a person on a daily basis. Of course, this is mostly done unintentionally but it is noticeable.
Some flat out seek a confrontational attitude from others. Some are the same ones that got shoved into lockers or toilets in school too!

Take everything you read with a grain of salt and remember, the internet is all entertainment with some good knowledge sprinkled in.

[birch]

I urge anyone who is sick of this website to do one thing: stay out of the pit. It turns otherwise rational human beings into brute beasts--myself included.

I was given a time out in the pit section, and I now enjoy this site like I used to--before the addiction of trying to change people's minds became a focal point of my castboolit experience.

Now I can talk about guns. I believe this site is great place to ask for advise. If you are trying to change another person's mind on here, you will have a horrible experience, and it will likely turn you into a generally angry person.

Talk guns and boolits--one of the best combinations on God's green earth. Coffee and cigarettes are a close second!

[fatelk]

I used to be much more involved in forums. Sometimes I felt compelled to reply in a thread when someone was incorrect, misunderstood, or just plain rude. I always tried to word my post carefully and politely, but sometimes I would get attacked. It might have felt like the forum was full of jerks, but in reality it was probably just a very few. It only takes a couple jerks or arrogant know-it-alls to spoil your fun.

Now I just don't. I don't get involved in drama. I avoid the pit. I generally don't post at all unless I have something to say. Especially after an incident on another forum not too long ago, a forum usually at least as polite as this one (believe it or not) that's normally very drama-free. There was a thread going about a certain type of gun, and one guy chimed in that they were inherently dangerous and should never be fired, rounded up and destroyed instead.

I responded with my experience and opinion, politely or so I thought. Another member replied to my post, attacking me strongly, arrogantly belittling and berating me. I looked around a little to find that he was a forum "heavyweight", big man on campus. He probably had a lot of knowledge and experience, and if I had to guess might have been collecting guns longer than I have been alive. He certainly had his opinions. I suppose it made him feel pretty self important to tear someone down and ruin their day. It's a great forum but I haven't been back, and won't, because of one jerk. Maybe that's childish but so be it.

[fatelk]

This is a little off-topic for the specific subject matter of this thread, but relevant to the title at least. I've been toying off and on with "taking a break" myself for quite a while, mostly just to put away my casting and loading gear to focus on more important things for a few years, such as spend more time with my kids and getting more involved in their interests and hobbies.

Well, as of today that's looking more involuntary than not. I'm raising a family on a single income, a fairly good income I think, but we're dang frugal and still can't get ahead. Anyhow, the company I've put in many years with bought another huge multi-billion$ company, and has now given us to them, and moved us over to their benefits. This means massive losses in retirement contributions and unbelievable increases in cost of health insurance. Everyone's been hoping they'll make it better in the future (we bought them, right?) but today a high-up muckety-muck mentioned in a meeting that what we had before was really way too generous and don't expect it to get too that much better. We're talking over $1k per month difference or more for some people.

On top of that, an hour later my wife informs me that she took our daughter to the orthodontist and she needs oral surgery and braces asap, to the tune of $6k, and orthodontics are not covered at all with our new insurance.

So anyhow, sorry for venting and drifting the thread. I know a lot of people out there have it worse than I do. It's just been a bad day. One thing's for sure: no buying guns in the foreseeable future. I'm going to have some molds and such for sale in swapping and selling. I'll likely get rid of some guns that haven't been out of the safe in a while. I've got a bunch of surplus ammo that's worth quite a bit, thinking that will all end up on Gunbroker. A lot of other odds and ends will end up on ebay. The thought of selling the house, uprooting the family and moving again for work makes me sick to my stomach, but it's high time to clear out a literal ton of stuff with that possibility in mind.

[JonB_in_Glencoe]

SNIP...
Anyhow, the company I've put in many years with bought another huge multi-billion$ company, and has now given us to them, and moved us over to their benefits. This means massive losses in retirement contributions and unbelievable increases in cost of health insurance. Everyone's been hoping they'll make it better in the future (we bought them, right?) but today a high-up muckety-muck mentioned in a meeting that what we had before was really way too generous and don't expect it to get too that much better.

That happened to me in 2003...which is when I left that company, and was the beginning of my contract work as a independent contractor. I was lucky, in that I was able to make the same $$$ per year for working much less hours. I officially retired from that, last July. I mentioned this, it may be time to change your employment status.

[Adam20]

What is the pit? second Time i seen that in the last few days. Thanks

I used the search box and it came up empty. Usually has my awnser in there.

[beezapilot]

The "Pit Problem" popped up a few years ago- if memory serves you can contact a moderator and they will delete it from your profile access, so you'll not see it at all (much like the newbies), personally, I just rarely go there.

[jmort]

What is the pit? second Time i seen that in the last few days. Thanks

I used the search box and it came up empty. Usually has my awnser in there.

You get access after a certain number of posts. It is for political and religious discussion. I don't get people whining and crying about it. Just don't go there. They act as if some involuntay force compelled them to go to the sub-forum known as The Pit. It is voluntary and if this thread were in The Pit it would be 5 pages long rather than being moribund and largely ignored. A whole lot of action/ posting in The Pit. The Pit is popular for good reason.

[jmort]

Here, I will stretch out this thread and raise my post count
It is at the bottom of the Sub-forums

The Pit.

Threads / Posts

Last Post

No swearing, porn, assaults, or whining. No exceptions. If you are offended, stay out. 6 months and 100 posts before access is allowed. Mind your manners or you will lose the Privilege to post in the Pit

[Recluse]

What is the pit? second Time i seen that in the last few days.

The Pit is like the little house-of-ill-repute that sits outside many small to medium sized towns. A lot of people gripe and complain about it publicly, but get caught with their pants down inside that little place when they think nobody will notice.

It doesn't hurt anyone who doesn't go there, but it can cause all kinds of problems for those who do and can't control their visits or conduct there.

[Adam20]

Thank you for responses, i read and learn here, I was a lurker for a long time. Started casting a few months ago.
Sorry for thread drift, this place stays on topic better than most.

[Boaz]

The pit is a test . There are those that in 'real life' would never say what they do there . You simply stand up for what you truly believe , disinters can hang . The pit does provide of vengeance , pay back(?) , trolls , enemies (perceived or real) . If you go there be ready , .....you will be put apon . Knowing that you deal with it or fade away . Stand or run , if your not sure then stay away .

In my opinion the pit serves no purpose except to create disharmony , carries over to the threads but not my call . If I post there I and only I will prove or take the resulting comment . In reality the PIT is a good place to avoid .

[bdicki]

I usually just hit the unread posts button, so I end up in the pit a lot. I try to just read.

[mold maker]

The pit is exactly what you make of it. If you go there with a chip on your shoulder, it will be quickly removed. If you don't post, nobody really knows your there. If ya ask a question, you'll likely get opinions both good and bad. It's all up to you.
Don't go there with thin skin and an argumentative frame of mind, because you'll likely find more of the same.
On the other hand there are lots of informative and thought filled discussions there also.