Saga of the Asperly Aimless

[Beekeeper]

I feel sorry for poor Donna.
She is left holding the potting bench up!
Will buckshot ever return to replace the leg?
Should one of you complete gentlemen hurry over and releive her of this odurous task?
Will the leg ever get replaced or will Donna spend the rest of her life holding up the bench while waiting for someone to assist her?

These are important questions that must be asked of this aggust membership!

The very idea of going off to a burrito shoot without addressing this issue is a major setback for the membership of the burrito shoot.

I will come to Donna's rescue and as buckshot owes me a keyboard due to his rendition of the shoot I will solve both problems.I will take the asperly off of his hands and use it for a tomato stake and will arrive at his home with a new wooden leg for Donna.

Lets see < HMMM, Measure once and cut twice, or is it measure twice and cut once, either way I think Donna's potting bench will be a lot shorter soon.


Jim

[NoDakJak]

The perfect caast boolit for the Asperly is paper patched and shaped like a boomarang. Very effective boolit. just don't forget to duck low! Neil

[montana_charlie]

I will take the asperly off of his hands and use it for a tomato stake and will arrive at his home with a new wooden leg for Donna.

I am certain that Donna will be eternally grateful for that. Do you also plan to bring a leg for the potting bench she is holding up?

I only ask because, if she must continue to support the table, she will never have a chance to try out her new leg on the dance floor...or in the garden.
CM

[Beekeeper]

I'm not sure but I think buckshot might get a little sore if he returned from the burrito shoot and found Donna dancing with a stranger.
He even might load and shoot the aimless again and who knows what damage it would do to the neighbors houses.
And think about Donna having to live down the horror of having to repair all those houses as we know what shooting the aimless does to buckshots shoulder blades.

Maybe I should offer to bring both ie: leg for table and for Donna and just leave and have the aimless mailed to me.
I don't think the post office would mind as it isn't considered a firearm and they would be doing buckshot a favor.

Jim

[runfiverun]

i would think after almost two years you might wanna do the gentlemanly thing and bring poor donna a glass of lemonade i would think that holding up the potting bench this long would be thirsty work.
her and the benches leg could then be replaced but not in that order,good benches are hard to find.
i believe at this point the aimless will once again be used, and you should be well on your way home.

[AZ-Stew]

I'm not sure but I think buckshot might get a little sore if he returned from the burrito shoot and found Donna dancing with a stranger.
Jim

I think he'd be more upset of he came home and found her with a wooden leg.

Regards,

Stew

[Beekeeper]

Now you see there Stew ,it has been 2 years and none of you gentlemen has offered to help Donna.
It takes a feller like me that hasn't been around very long to jog your minds.
I sure hope the good Lady hasn't been put to a lot of pain by having to hold up that bench for 2 years.
Maybe buckshots shoulder blades ain't the only thing what got pushed cattywompas.

Jim

[Blacksmith]

I had a cattywompas once but he ran away. I replaced him with two housecats and two barncats

Blacksmith

[Thumbcocker]

Because there is nothing more personal than a personal firearm I have held my tounge until now. I feel I must speak out on this topic. I am very disturbed to see a desire to randomly scatter shots over the target and surrounding countryside devolve into an equipment game culminating in the Asperly Aimless.

Fellow booliteers please save your money and remember that it is not the equipment but the shooter that attains the goal. I do not own and could never hope to afford such a piece of engineering as an Asperly. Even the vanilla sporting models are beyond my modest means. That however has never stopped me from dispersing my shots all over the targets, the berm, and the surrounding county WITH OFF THE SHELF FIREARMS. While I have never had the plesure of even touching an Asperly I am confidnet that my shot dispersions would rival all but the most deluxe models. I am sure of this because on the few occasions I have been allowed to shoot high end firearms I have producerd "groups" that would make Professor Asperly proud. Then there is the area of my hunting "prowess" .

After much contemplation I have decided that I would be willing to teach my techniques to some of the younger members of this list so that they to can enjoy shot dispersion with their factory firearms. You older shooters who have grown used to regulary getting nice groups on target or one shot kills on the various critters that you use to fill your freezer are, I am sad to say, beyond my poor ability to help in your quest for shot dispersion.

So you young shooters out there if you are really willing to work hard, really hard, I will take you under my wing and share my most closly guarded shot dispersion secrets with you. At the end of your period of study you will be able to disperse shots in such a random manner that you will be the talk lf the range or every informal plinking session. You will be legnd in deer camp and game fields. No need to thank or pay me; this is my lasting legacy to a new generation.

[Beekeeper]

I have thought about this all night and think I have come up with an answer to the problem and still give Buckshot all of the credit for all of the work he did.
I have decided to take up a collection to use for Buckshots medical expences.
Send your donations to me at Prisoner 301906, San Quenton Ca.
I will send a team of medical crack personal to Buckshots place to help him to be able to see lightning and hear thunder once again.
The repairs to his shoulder blades I'm afraid will take a lot longer.

Part of the donations will be used to pay legal fees for Buckshot for as you know Non Destructive Testingof a barn from the inside with out the proper government equipment is a serious offence as well as the non destruction of a barn from the inside is also.
I have talked to the telephone and electric co's and they tell me he has no worries concerning the insulators.

I know we have all read the entire post and know the headaches and heartaches Buckshot went thru with his reasearch and development as well as the restoration of the test weapon.
A great Kudo should be sent by each of us for his dedication to the project.

Any moneys left over will be used to buy Donna a new wooden leg so she does not have to hold up the potting table anymore.

Once all this has been completed Buckshot will be able to return to the tusday burritos shoot.
A question:
How many burritos do you have to shoot to create enough foo-gas to fuel the high speed plane Buckshot is interested in.
If we help him shoot enough burritos we could fuel it and he could fly over the Kyber Pass area of Afganastan and drop off all of his paper work and copies of the original pattens and we could have brand new Asperly Aimless Deluxe rifles ,New in box , available by mid year 2010 then we will all be able to enjoy trying to hit the inside of a barn from the inside!


Jim

[thx997303]

Oops, wrong topic.

[Blacksmith]

Look at what you did. Now everybody will know and those unfortunates will never be able to get rid of their asper.... I mean outstanding examples of the gunmakers art that are the culmanation of ballistic engineering and a trip through the junk yard.

[thx997303]

But don't you want to do the world a service by expanding everyone's knowledge of these fine arms?

To shoot objects on the outside of a closed barn from the inside without perforating the barn itself is truly a miracle of firearm design! Only the finest of marksmen should be allowed to even gaze upon such a work!

[9.3X62AL]

Oh, good--the A/A returns from exile.

For the record, Donna has kept our Buckshot on the jump with construction projects and remodeling efforts since our last glance at this thread. I would hardly know the place if I hadn't checked in once in a while to keep pace with Rick's Herculean efforts. During this time, Rick has had little oppurtunity to use hose clamp ends as front sight staffs, and barn shooting has been off the grid entirely. I do miss the WHIRRRRR of cartwheeling boolits and the raw adventure of not knowing which ZIP Code the boolits will be headed for on those occasions that ignition occurs.

[thx997303]

Did Jim there ever provide Donna with a new wooden leg?

It seems insensitive that she hold that bench up for 4 years now.

I do hope Buckshot can continue shooting burritos and doing non destructive live fire testing from inside the barn in the near future.

[Frank46]

Did Asperly ever detirmine wether or not solid boolits or the ones with the hole all the way through provided the best accuracy in the reverse gain twist rifling. Last I heard he was still out in the boonies doing tests. Seems the forestry service had to go out and find him due to aftershocks when he shot some of his creations. Frank

[9.3X62AL]

Folks out here near the San Andreas Fault are a might twitchy about plate tectonics and aftershocks. Gotta keep such things in mind with the A/A, 4"-barrelled Model 29s, and 30 Carbine Blackhawks. I moved out to Ridgecrest to get around those concerns. There are even more faults out this way, and they move around daily, but the locals don't mind as much as city-dwellers when the soil joggles around. Lots less out here to damage, too.

[Box13]

I think I remember reading about the Asperly Aimless in Rifle magazine many years ago.I was quite impressed with his ability to keep the helical deflection of the rifling down to less then .001 in the average barrel and some target models were even said to be within .0001 of being perfectly straight from one end to the other...just amazing by modern standards...

[JonB_in_Glencoe]

I've been lookin' on gunBROKEr for an Aimless...skunked

[TXGunNut]

I've been lookin' on gunBROKEr for an Aimless...skunked

Just another sign of the times. Some quicker, more astute buyer snatched it up immediately. I'm sure they'll be back to normal availability soon.