I am mad , at a loss .

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11-02-2017, 08:53 PM
Boaz

I am mad , at a loss .

An Alzheimer's Lady I have been visiting is going to be moved (kick out of) a rest home to a place to die . Her family is calling me , the treatment team from the rest home has contacted me . Everyone is suffering from the decision yet they in the end tell me . I have no authority but am the common factor .

Prayer is needed , I can not cure or solve this problem . The weight of it and lack of what I can do is overwhelming . In the end I am powerless . Pray for this women and her family . I am lost to give support to all .
11-02-2017, 09:31 PM
GhostHawk

Brother Boaz, some situations are not able to be "fixed" by us.

Alzheimers, dementia are terrible. My dad suffered from the latter the last 3 years.

Before he died he got moved to a different facility 90 miles away because he was injuring the staff.
They changed his meds around, but the meds they put him on were kidney and heart killers.

They were just able to get him stabilized, and moved back with mom for a single day before he died. The decision in that case came down to my sister. And thankfully she found the courage to make the right choice.

There is no easy answer here. But I know a lot of facilities simply do not have the ability to care for people with those problems. It takes a whole nother level of training, of physical security. So the people can't wander out the door. It takes a whole different approach.

So while I feel your pain. Some times we have to accept that some things we can not fix.

Drop that burden at the Lord's feet. Let him decide what is the right thing. And then live with it.

Be strong brother, it will be hard, but you can do this.

Know that I love you. Worry about you, pray for you.
11-02-2017, 10:00 PM
leeggen

Boaz, you have been a shoulder for those needing to relieve their tension. Sounds to me you have helped already! Your a good man.
CD
11-03-2017, 06:32 AM
buckwheatpaul

Charlie, You have a great big heart and try to help anyone in need. I do admire your stamina and the way you wear your Christianity....you literally talk the talk and walk the walk! You know you cant solve all the problems and it is natural for you to internalize failure as your fault....IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

Father, I pray that You motivate some organization will take her in and give her the dignity that she deserves during her final days and hours. Please be with her any hold her hand as she comes unto You. Father, please help this lady. AMEN
11-03-2017, 06:52 AM
daloper

Father God. We don't know all your plans but we know that you are in control. Be with this women and her family during this time. Give them comfort and ease their burden. Give this women the loving care that she needs and deserves in this late stage of her life. When the time comes guild her home to you and give her peace. Be with brother Charlie and give him strength in this and help him realize that what he does is good enough. He does this to give glory to you. In the name of your Son and our Savior, Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.
11-03-2017, 07:36 AM
Boaz

I thank all for your encouragement and thank you for your prayer . I know I can't fix every situation but I feel in this case I might have been able to sway the rest home to keep her .

She is not combative or creating a problem . She fell last week but just bruised herself , no permeant damage . The care she is getting is good and everything has been going fine . But the home is due for a state survey and they are worried about getting dinged if she has any more problems . THAT IS THE REASON SHE IS BEING MOVED .
I have been sick with the crud for 10-12 days and self isolating , I'm not going around these folks that already have physical/medical problems . In the process I missed 3 meeting with management , treatment team and a family consultation .

There is no assurance I could have made a difference but I never had the chance . Dealing on the phone is hopeless , needs to be in person . The ball is in play now , it's in process . This sad situation should have never happened , it is beyond aggravating .
11-03-2017, 07:51 AM
GhostHawk

The fact is the facility was worried about getting dinged. Nothing you could do on your end was going to change that. Was it? And all of it while you are sick in bed with a fever lucky to survive.

Stubborn much Boaz? Beginning to think you could give mules lessons on stubborn.

Sometimes some things are just out of our hands. Trick is to see which is which.

Get well brother.
11-03-2017, 07:53 AM
jcren

Prayer sent
11-03-2017, 08:09 AM
USMC87

I am sorry to hear this, We are adding this situation to our prayer list.
11-03-2017, 04:34 PM
Pine Baron

Charlie, it ain't over til it's over. You can't go in person until your not contagious anymore. You can only deal with it over the phone. Persistence, patience and understanding. Whatever you do, don't lose your temper (keep that love in your heart), you still may be able to make a difference, HOWEVER, it may come to a point where it's totally out of reach, then you'll have to be satisfied that you did all that you could do. It's all in God's hands anyway. Praying for God's will be done. God bless you brother.
11-03-2017, 04:42 PM
koehn,jim

I will say a prayer for the lady.
11-03-2017, 04:55 PM
claude

(Jonah 4:4) "¶ Then said the LORD, Doest thou well to be angry?"
11-03-2017, 05:08 PM
castalott

Sincere prayers for Faith, Hope, Mercy,Love, and Understanding... Special prayers for this good lady....wrap her in Your Arms ,Lord.....Mercy, Love, and Redemption for her... Amen
11-03-2017, 05:30 PM
rancher1913

do not beat yourself up, you were not meant to be there.
11-03-2017, 06:32 PM
Boaz

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pine Baron

Charlie, it ain't over til it's over. You can't go in person until your not contagious anymore. You can only deal with it over the phone. Persistence, patience and understanding. Whatever you do, don't lose your temper (keep that love in your heart), you still may be able to make a difference, HOWEVER, it may come to a point where it's totally out of reach, then you'll have to be satisfied that you did all that you could do. It's all in God's hands anyway. Praying for God's will be done. God bless you brother.

Ted I love you brother , can't imagine how you could think I would lose my temper (lol) . Talking on the phone is a cowards way , face to face makes one heck of a difference . I know the administrator , social worker , charge nurse down to the aids . I understand the system , the survey was never mentioned in the conferences I mentioned but I know several members of the survey teams . I understand what is happening .
I been doing this a while . Political correctness and governmental regulation.........Yea . I COULD HAVE MADE A DIFFRENCE . In my own redneck way with enough 50 cent words could have turned this situation .
11-03-2017, 06:39 PM
Boaz

Quote:

Originally Posted by rancher1913

do not beat yourself up, you were not meant to be there.

rancher1913 your words echo for me . GOD is in control . GOD is directing this situation . That I believe and understand . Thank you .

I will follow this woman and her family to a new situation . Yes ! GOD will be in control .