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Thumbcocker
04-27-2017, 07:47 PM
Iirc I first heard this story at a family gathering in the 60's or 70's. I had several great uncles who were vets. They generally held the truth in high regard but were known to give it a bit of a stretching on occasion. As such I make no representation abot the veracity of the story.

The setting is a rocky hilltop in Korea. A grim faced Captain is addressing his under strength company.

Captain: " Men this hill is vital to our whole section of the line. It is good ground and the Chinese want it bad. Intel says that they are going to hit us hard at dawn tomorrow and we will be outnumbered 12 to 1. I need every man to do his part. We have a good position and plenty of ammo so I know we can hold." One of the soldiers was a Southern Illinois Country Boy. The captain watched as he checked his rifle (always spotless) adjusted his gear and took up his position. The SICB had a little trouble in the army at first but once he realized that the top brass didn't care if what they wanted him to do made sense to him or not he got along fine and made a good soldier.


Sure enough; at dawn the next morning the enemy hit hard. The Captain went from position to position encouraging his men and showing true leadership. The Captain happened to look up at the peak of the battle and saw SICB behind the line having just finished cleaning his M1 and opening a can of pound cake. The Captain ran and crawled over to SICB and the following conversation occurred.


Captain: What the @##!!! are you doing here!
BOOM rat tattat bang boom
SICB Oh Hey Capin' just getting ready to open this pound cake. Want a bite. (obviously SICB like the Captain a lot)

Captain: Didn't you listen when I addressed the company yesterday?
boom bang boom booom pow pow
SICB: yessr darn fine speech you gave the boys.

Captain: Didn't you hear me say that we are outnumbered 12 to 1?
burrrp tat tat bang boom
SICB: Yessir.

Captain: Didn't you hear me say that I was counting on every man to do his part?
BLAM BANG BOOM BURRP BOOM BOOM
SICB: Yesssir.

Captain: SO WHAT THE %$#&&!!! ARE YOU DOING HERE!!
BANG BBOM BOOM TAT TAT POW POW ARRRGH
SICB: Don't worry Cap'n I done got my 12.

xs11jack
04-27-2017, 07:50 PM
Now and then some of them good ole boys get real literal.
Ole Jack