Only in America

[snowwolfe]

Only In America
Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people
can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America ......do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a diet coke..
Only in America .....do banks leave vault doors open and then chain
the pens to the counters.
Only in America ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in
the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America ..........do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and
buns in packages of eight..
Only in America .....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER ...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
I like this one!!!
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

[Half Dog]

Those were great!!!!

[bedbugbilly]

Thanks for the daily chuckle snowwolfe! Those were good! :-)

[aspangler]

Stole it and passed it on. Thanks for the chuckle!

[slownsteady22]

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

Enough said!!

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[leeggen]

Wonder if McDaneil will argue withthe congress one? Seems pretty true to me.
CD

[smokeywolf]

Actually Congress makes great progress at spending your money on other people.

[bullet maker 57]

Love it.

[Taylor]

Drive up atm's and braille? When I worked at the Post Office,all the doors were labeled that way too.I would often think how a blind person could work there.One who can see,screws things up pretty good sometimes.Can you imagine a blind clerk or carrier.

[blackthorn]

Here is another:
If a reformed alcoholic don't drink---What is a reformed Christion??

[Skinny]

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

If cats always land on their feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down.....what would happen if you strap a piece of buttered bread to the back of a cat and drop it out the window?

[bubba.50]

only in America is the largest box of detergent and the smallest of cars both called "Economy Size".

[dbarry1]

very funny stuff!

[woodbutcher]

:D Ohhhhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.So true.
Good luck.Have fun.Be safe.
Leo

[finstr]

Why is it when things are sent by car or truck its called "shipping". But when it's placed on a ship it's called "cargo"?

[flyingmonkey35]

Ahh.i can answer. Them ALL. But ill do just burger. Coke thing.

I am diabetic. I can eat all the meat i want. I can eat the fries. But the soda if not diet will knock. Me out faster then eating 4 big macks. Carbs vs surger intake. All in moderation.

And its not just America. We just invented. It.

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