I feel guilty, what should I do?

[Indiana shooter]

Hope this is the right place for this post. If not, please feel free to move it.

I have a co-worker that has brought me back 5 buckets of coww, all lead. He said that his uncle has owned a tire shop for 20 plus years and has been saving only the lead weights to start casting boolits for himself. He never did get into casting and has recently got in trouble with the law prohibiting him from owning a firearm. So he's giving them all away.

According to my co-worker, his uncle is going to give me all of his wheel weights. He's talking about at least 30 buckets worth. I have offered everything from cash to beer and both my co-worker and his uncle have refused any type of payment. I have offered my co-worker free boolits (as components not loaded ammo) and he swears he'll never run lead through a gun again.

Long story short, I have been raised in the believe that you should always pay for what you have received. So, this blessing has left me feeling guilty. Does anyone have any ideas or words that could ease my mind?

[bubba.50]

payin' it forward comes to mind.

[Handloader109]

Melt them down, sell off the clips, pass that bit back to them if not in cash, then in commercial bullets to your friend. Pass some on to someone else who is in need of lead. If they just won't take anything, pass on to someone else when you can.

[country gent]

SOme want to be helpfull and to some they are getting rid of unuseable material. I have bought gift certificate cards at nice resteraunts for friends for thier help. I also listen to them and when they talk an intrest or need help them if I can. Listen and pay attention at some point a need or want will be mentioned and you can step up to repay the favors.

[bob208]

in my younger days I would shovel the snow for the old woman across the street and clean out the others driveways with my snow blower without pay. now my neighbor comes down and cleans out my driveway and will take nothing for it. so if you do a good dead it comes back to you years later. so maybe you are getting payback.

[pworley1]

+1 on what country gent said.

[waksupi]

Getting rid of thirty buckets may be a blessing to them, and they feel overjoyed to be rid of them. The gift certificate is a nice idea.

[Indiana shooter]

I have already offered gift cards, they refused.

I like the idea of paying it forward. I may have to do that if it's as much as my co-worker says it is. For now I have to replenish my stock as I have been down to less than 50 lbs of roofing lead for more than 2 months now.

[Plate plinker]

Are you near Goshen?
And do you have a smelter?

Oh and will the foundations of your garage handle all that weight?:kidding:

[Beagle333]

You (or a hired somebody) could cut his grass or shovel his snow (or whatever you have there) for several times. 8-)

[trails4u]

This was one of the hardest lessons I ever learned in my life. Sometimes.....someone just wants to do something nice for you, and the best thing you can do, for them, is to simply and graciously accept their generosity. You strike me as a man of great character, so I have to assume you too have given some gifts in your time...... When on the giving end, did you expect anything in return??? I didn't think so! :)

[Indiana shooter]

Trails4u, I didn't think of it that way, honestly I would be insulted if the tables were turned.

Plate plinker, I have recently moved across the Ohio to Louisville. At least for a spell, I can't stand being able to spit out my window and it land on the neighbors house. (Literally, I accidentally did it when we first moved here)

[Plate plinker]

Bummer on being in Louisville. I understand the housing is tight you sure do see it when you pass through on the interstate. Best of luck.

[mehavey]

...raised in the believe that you should always pay for what you have received.Accept it for what it is... a gift... and pay it forward to someone else sometime.
Sooner or later it all comes around.

And who knows? Maybe he's paying forward himself.... :wink:

[GoodOlBoy]

I believe I know where my next sets of tires, and rotations would be coming from since he owns a tire shop.

Just saying.

GoodOlBoy

[jeepvet]

I fully agree with Trials4u. It is a great blessing to you to receive this gift, but don't rob your friend of his blessing of giving. It is also a great thing to pass on blessings when you can. Just think what kind of place this world would be if we all looked for ways to help each other without expecting anything in return? This forum is a great place to start.

[MaryB]

My neighbor has been helping me with heavy lifting stuff because of the neck surgery. She won't take anything but I have had her over for BBQ twice!

[CLAYPOOL]

Help a kid and tell both party's what you did. Talk to their parents first and take them to the local "Hunter Safety Course". Tell the parent it for safety, first in this day and age....

[WILCO]

I have already offered gift cards, they refused.

I like the idea of paying it forward.

Not every gift received has to be the cause of guilt, nor does it have to be paid forward to assuage the perceived guilt. Just accept it. Enjoy it. Share it at your leisure. Make memories. Life is good.

It really is that simple.

[Geraldo]

Not every gift received has to be the cause of guilt, nor does it have to be paid forward to assuage the perceived guilt. Just accept it. Enjoy it. Share it at your leisure. Make memories. Life is good.

It really is that simple.

No gift should be the cause of guilt. The guy gave you something you can use, that by the way cost him nothing. Take it in the spirit it was given and drive on. I've been humbled by unexpected gifts but never guilt ridden.

[mold maker]

If you feel obligated and they wont accept your offers, make a donation to a favorite charity in their name.

[akajun]

Food is always good , cook him a brisket, steaks, pork loin, or just pick up his bill at lunch one day.

[clintsfolly]

Friday night I was unloading a big pile of hardwood boards in to the garage about half way thru the sky went form blue sky to down pour. As I was getting drenched the neighbor came over and just started to help. We got my wood out of the rain and we both looked like a drowned rats. As I thanked him he said" I could not set and watch you struggle and not help". So today I am going to give a jar of my homemade strawberry jam. Not much in value but a jester of my Thanks and I know he love it. Clint

[TXGunNut]

Agreed on the pay-it-forward concept, his gift is quite possibly a blessing coming back to you. You'll have an opportunity to help him someday. Besides, at this point they're probably just getting in his way. Floor space is at a premium in a tire store today with all the tire sizes and equipment they have to have, much more than when he started out.

[Garyshome]

Give them a Gift Card to A Great Place To Eat! Never gets refused...Never!

[tryNto]

This was one of the hardest lessons I ever learned in my life. Sometimes.....someone just wants to do something nice for you, and the best thing you can do, for them, is to simply and graciously accept their generosity. You strike me as a man of great character, so I have to assume you too have given some gifts in your time...... When on the giving end, did you expect anything in return??? I didn't think so! :)

Exactly ! Offer twice, after that don't insult the person by offering again.
Their gift to you is their reward.

[Superfly]

Get him a gift card for a great place to eat and tell him you will take the time to enjoy this just like yourself will enjoy his gift. And buy a new set of tires to. LOL

[MaryB]

Pay it forward down the road always works too! Seems like every time someone has helped me out I have had an opportunity to repay it to someone else a few months later. Last time it was an older lady stalled on the side of the road. Nobody was stopping to see what was wrong. I pulled over and walked back to see what was going on. She said her car had stalled 35 minutes ago, she had no cell phone and was freezing. I got her into my truck with a blanket and gave her my cellphone to call a wrecker. I bet 20 or more people passed her by without stopping.

[country gent]

I learned when my wife was killed that most people are very good hearted and want to help in any way possible. Some brought food some helped with the kids one mowed the lawn so it didnt get ahead of us. Several offered other help. None would take anything for thier efforts and time. Its something the good want to do and the dooing is the reward they want. Believe it or not a Heartfelt Thank-you goes farther with most than anything else. Your friendship and support is what got this going and they are repaying this in thier minds. Its always nice to pass it on to others in need also. The more this happens the better place the world becomes.

[KYCaster]

What should you do?

Read post #11 again and quit feeling guilty.

[Char-Gar]

What is it about the concept of a gift that you don't understand. Are you telling me your family never gave and received gifts and that everything had to be quid pro quo?

Giving something with no expectation of compensation is a good and joyful experience for many people. Don't cheat them out of it. Accept the gift and say thank you.

[slim1836]

If you decide to "Pay it forward" I'll gladly take half of those buckets of lead.:kidding:

Slim

[doc1876]

watch and see what happens, if he is in big trouble with the law, they may come and get him some day, and then his family will need help.

[goofyoldfart]

As per #11, that was the lesson that I had to learn also. At 70 years old I had pancreatic cancer surgery and for about 3 to 4 months, what with the surgery and chemo, I was weak, not wanting to eat much and couldn't do the things I was used to doing on my own. I had always helped others and was the mister fix-it guy plus being the taxi for a lot of people for shopping or the hospital or medical appointments and now I couldn't do hardly any of that. Many people stepped up and helped me. they cleaned house and took trash out for me and made me eat (always bringing food). many other things, too many to recount. It was very hard to humble myself and gracefully accept that help, BUT it has been a great growing experience for me. I learned a lot about my friends and did a lot of growing up myself. I learned a hell of a lesson, for which I am grateful. God Bless to you and yours.
Goofy aka Godfrey

[psmokey]

What goes around comes around.
.Phil