How do you know when to quit?

[bikerbeans]

A good friend of mine was diagnosed with Parkinson's about 12 years ago. He has continued to hunt and shoot while his condition has degraded. I helped him to gun hunt for deer until 2 years ago when I became worried about his uncontrolled movement with a gun. I stopped taking him Xbow hunting last year. I was worried for both my safety and his. We had many talks about him continuing to hunt but he didn't want to give up this part of his life; can't say I blame him. His son has continued to take him hunting, but that all ended on Saturday in a floating duck blind. My friend lost his balance, another mini-seizure, while trying to shoot a duck and continued to shot while falling. The last shot just missed another hunter in the blind. Now my friend admits he is done hunting and shooting.


We all eventually will not be able to hunt or shoot. Short of a massive heart attack and sudden death, how do you know when to quit? This question probably doesn't have an answer. I only asked because I think about it a lot. I have respiratory failure, a bad heart and am hooked to oxygen 24/7 so needing to answer this question is real to me. I don't want to leave this world knowing that I hurt or killed someone because I was too feeble to handle a weapon.


BB

[Garyshome]

Use your best judgement. That's all you can do and hope he understands.

[1Shirt]

We need to be honest with people and not worry about hurting feelings. Gun handling or driving, or what ever when age or disability reality exists, you should never pussyfoot around the issue. Often it is not the person with the problem who gets hurt or killed, but some other poor individual.
1Shirt!

[Dave C.]

When they take your drivers licence.

Dave C.

[texassako]

My grandfather had macular degeneration and still tried shooting with his peripheral vision. It took a bit of heated 'intervention' to convince him he should not be handling firearms. He lost his drivers license because of his vision problem, but we would get calls to come get him and his riding mower off the side of the highway. People can be stubborn about giving up something against their will.

[Char-Gar]

It has fallen my lot in life to be a part of many peoples lives who face aging and death. Some of them do it well and some do not.

I am now 71 and can begin to feel the weight of the years, but have no health conditions that do not allow me to continue with my life more or less as I want, but like you I think of the short road ahead and how I will deal with it. The farther down the road we go toward the end, the more life takes things away from us. That which we once had is no longer a part of us until one day even life itself will be taken from us.

Old age is pretty much a "come as you are party". We deal with age (or not) about the same way we have dealt will loss and difficulties in our earlier years. We can look at the road behind us and that is the best indicator of how we will respond to the road ahead.

No body can give us a formula for when to "hang it up". However the fact that you are concerned about continuing and hurting somebody is probably the best sign you won't. Folks who are only concerned about themselves are the ones that hurt others. Folks who are concerned about others are far less likely to do harm to others.

You have my best wishes as you work through these "end of life" issues. They are common to us all or will be soon enough.

[kenjuudo]

Well, after my grandpa quit carrying a gun afield, he was mentoring, going along as camp squaw to the deer camp, passing on a lifetime of knowledge.

[bikerbeans]

Well, after my grandpa quit carrying a gun afield, he was mentoring, going along as camp squaw to the deer camp, passing on a lifetime of knowledge.

That is where I think I am heading. I can't do much harm cooking other than adding too many hot peppers to the chili.

BB

[theperfessor]

I quit shooting shotguns when diabetic neuropathy in my legs got to the point where I couldn't stand still and needed to use a cane to not wobble in place. I can still shoot rifles off a bench and pistols one-handed with my cane and of course at a bench also.

I quit when I thought I would endanger other people; I don't want the bad kharma from something like that.

[AlaskanGuy]

Bless you sir. And bless your life. Char-Gar has brought up some interesting things as well...

The circle of life is a funny thing.. No one is exempt. There comes a point when it is our turn to step back, and just mentor all of the experience and teachings the old ones did for us when we were young as well.. I think that is our unselfish job as the gates become visible ahead. We must realize that while we may not be able to walk for miles, or hold a gun steady, there is still much to give, and teach. That is the value of getting older, passing along the teachings of our own fathers to our own young people, and if we don't have our own young people to pass it too, then we should find somebody, anybody, and make a difference in their life. I understand why older folks get so lonely at times, and i for one will hopefully not be one of those. I hope to teach and pass on right till the end. For me, it is my responsibility. But what is right for me is not what is right for all. Find a way to make a difference in a young persons life, with the same dogged determination that brought you through your long life. That is what i say.. And bless those that are doing just that.

I still remember the old ones like Bud Fine, that took me under his wing when i was a boy and taught me to fly fish and tie fly's, or old john that taught me how to gold pan... The list goes on and on.

Alaskan

[shdwlkr]

Well for me it will come I hope a long time from now. I have a seven year old son that gets to see dad way too little and he has asked dad to take him hunting starting this spring. He wants to learn to hunt with dad our first will be turkeys this spring. His mom and her new man are hell bent on beating dad to be the first to take my son hunting and he has said he will go but he wants to hunt with dad and that will be more fun for him.

You must realize that "dad" meaning me is in his late sixties, don't go there and that it will most likely be one of the last chances I have to pass on hunting skills I learned so many years ago from my dad.

He already has his own black 22Lr firearm that he likes and now it is time to find a shotgun and the list goes on. When I am gone he will have first pick of dad's stuff and I hope that is a very long time away. Yes he and his little sister yep I have two small ones every so often ask dad to stick around until they are grown and on their own.

Life is funny sometimes but that request is hard to answer and even harder to deal with. You see they don't really like being away from dad and they are 5 hours away. Dad is the guy who lets them be kids, dad is the one that will sit up with them at night when those scary things come out of the dark and scare them. Dad is the one who if they are not feeling well will curl up in a chair with them and hold them so they can rest if needed or just read a story or watch a kids movie with them until they can settle down and rest. Don't know what goes on when they are not with me and really don't want to know either.

[Ed Barrett]

That is where I think I am heading. I can't do much harm cooking other than adding too many hot peppers to the chili.

BB

How can you add too many hot peppers to good chili?

[country gent]

I am also dealing with this issue more and more. I have MS and numbness/mobility issues Just getting my gear to the line is a major issue for me let alone walking 200 yds to post a target. I did shoot BPCR Shillouette this past summer with a friend. While I am still safe mine is the being physically able to part. I shot the offhand sitting on a chair from the waist up to negate this last summer. I still go to the local range I belong to. and shoot from the benches or cross sticks. I may try prone next spring but my getting up wont be pretty. LOL.
The club members and friends have been great to me and a Thank-you to all of them. They offer to post targets for me, clean them up, help me carry things. One was shooting BPCR and offered to drive me and he helps with all the gear to. Hes been a very good friend. He comes out and we cast together aroundmy big pot when we need bullets. Ive taught him to cast his own bul;ets for the roller and sharps he shoots instead of buying them. I dont feel as safe around the lead pot as I used to with the mobility issues. Having him there is nice for the company and the security, if something would happen hes there to get help.
Its hard giving up independence and freedom. I dont drive like I used to, heavy traffic areas I have someone take me. I still mow lawn myself and most tasks though it takes me longer to accomplish now.
I have a hard time getting people to understand if Im falling let me I can normally go down with out hurting myself but if they are tangled up with me all bets are off ad someone is going to be hurt, let me fall and be there to help afterwards. Dont force help or attention on to me, I will ask when I need it, offer it . Doing what I can is a source of pride, and pride is also a terrible thing to waste. For some a change in "how" they do things is whats needed not completely stopping. ( if yor friend had been sitting upright in the blind when shooting would the incident have happened?) Work with the person in a controlled enviroment to see what is capable and doable. But above all allow them to have a say in the decissons. Or they very well may resent you at some point.

[mold maker]

All I can add is don't take any knowledge to the grave. Teach, help, give a hand along the way. Knowledge not shared is a total waste.

[454PB]

I faced all this when my Dad developed Alzheimers. He owned about 20 guns, and his wife (my step mother) was terrified that there would be an accident. One of his first symptoms was paranoia, and she told me he would stay up at night, looking out the windows with a shotgun in his hands.

My guilt really bothered me, but I finally removed all the guns from his house and shop. Some years latter when he finally lost his battle, I bought his Nissan pick up from my step Mom. While cleaning it out, I found a loaded Ruger Single Six hidden behind the seat.

It's tough enough to admit you're not safe with guns anymore, but even worse to take action for another.

[Char-Gar]

I faced all this when my Dad developed Alzheimers. He owned about 20 guns, and his wife (my step mother) was terrified that there would be an accident. One of his first symptoms was paranoia, and she told me he would stay up at night, looking out the windows with a shotgun in his hands.

My guilt really bothered me, but I finally removed all the guns from his house and shop. Some years latter when he finally lost his battle, I bought his Nissan pick up from my step Mom. While cleaning it out, I found a loaded Ruger Single Six hidden behind the seat.

It's tough enough to admit you're not safe with guns anymore, but even worse to take action for another.

I have been a part of a couple dozen family interventions when older folks became a danger to themselves or others and just would not back down graciously. It is always a very difficult thing, but it should be done with as much love and respect as possible.