View Full Version : My friend Tony

08-23-2013, 11:29 AM
My old buddy Tony and I grew up together. We hunted, trapped, fished, demolition derbied and partied together. I was the best man at his wedding. I hit my wife once when drunk and he kicked my ***!

Many here would probably consider him white trash. Cars cover his yard, animals pens everywhere and chickens running loose etc.
He spent three hitches in the US Army right out of school. He has worked since he was knee high. He is a Ford certified mechanic and worked at it for years.

Tony is a rough character! He takes little guff from anybody. He also has a heart of gold! He has always helped out any that really needed it and is a good friend.

Last fall he came over to tell me he had esophagus cancer. After chemo and radiation it looked good so they removed his esophagus and pulled his stomach into a tube. I seen him July 21 and he was looking great and the doc gave him a clean bill of health.

I got and invitation to his "I'm glad to be alive" hog roast which was last Sat. I about died when I seen him there! He was shriveld and old and sickly! He had been in the hospital again puking raw blood. He has stage 4 cancer and they gave him a year.

I went today to see him. Hosice is working with his family. H4e was incoherent and I stood on the porch talking to his wife and daughter. He called and his wife went then came back and told me to go see him. He was doped and hurting but we talked a bit. He looked at me and said " What are you gonna do?" In context he was saying he is just riding it out.

I talked to him a while back about salvation and God. He claims he is saved but a bible thumping church goer would probably question it. I hope for his sake that he is.

This is very hard for me. I have lost my parents and many loved family members over the years. Buried a beautiful 18 year old daughter a few years back. I have never watched a friend my age deteriorate and die.

I just need to vent a bit to my people. :)
Jay H

08-23-2013, 02:31 PM
Prayers are in order for all concerned,I read a verse on the the bible one time that stated that in a time of trouble call upon Jesus in his name and you would see the gates of heven.I don't remember the book or verse and the quote may be off some but the meaning is there.

08-24-2013, 02:19 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your buddy. I am fortunate enough to have a friend like that too. We were the best men at each other's weddings, raised our kids together, traded everything except wives!
He has had heart attacks, stents, bypasses, and had half of one kidney removed, due to cancer. When he leaves, this world will be a sorrier place - about how I reckon that you feel about your friend.
Saying a prayer for your friend and his family - and one for you.


08-24-2013, 02:38 AM
Sorry to hear of your buddy Jay. I lost my favorite uncle to the same thing just 2 years ago. He was the kind of guy you never needed to ask for help. He was always there before you could ask We were more like best friends. He was only 8 years older than I am. I know how you feel. Man I still miss him. I wish you well with dealing with this. My uncle was a very good family man and a Christian. He was not ever sad about the hand that was dealt to him. He kind of had a glow and at peace with the whole thing. Because he knew what was ahead waiting for him.

God Bless,

08-24-2013, 10:00 AM
I, too, am very sorry about this situation. Other than a divine healing I would hope for a peaceful passage.
Best wishes.

08-24-2013, 02:43 PM
Thanks guys. It seems the older I get the more sentimental I get.

I always figured folks like us went out in a flash!

Mebbe slow death is a way of teaching us something we need for Kingdom Come.

08-24-2013, 03:48 PM
Prayers sent for him, family and you.

08-24-2013, 07:34 PM
God bless Tony.

Uncle Jim
08-24-2013, 08:57 PM
Thoughts and Prayers for tony,
family, And YOU!

08-24-2013, 10:51 PM
Sorry to hear about your friend Jay.

08-25-2013, 06:13 AM
Good morning
No it is not easy. Another one of those aspects of life where we can say God give me the courage and strength to be what that family needs. I will pray for you Brother Jay.
Mike in Peru

08-27-2013, 02:19 PM
Got the call yesterday(Monday) morn from Tony's daughter. He passed early Mon morn. 54 is just too young!
I am happy he is at peace and not suffering. Tough as nails to the end!
I had a flat rear tire on my 61 Falcon one time. Tony was home on leave and was with me. I had a 4 way and a spare but no jack. I took off three lug nuts and had the spare right there. Tony picked up the rear of the car while I spun the last nut off, changed the wheel and got a nut started. He could punch a window out of a 60's Ford and put a C6 in without a jack! He was also very tender with babies and intricate machinery. ;)
I sure am gonna miss him!
Thanks for all the prayers and good wishes .

08-27-2013, 02:36 PM
Sorry to hear about the loss friend I fortunately still have all my friends with me they become family and are never forgotten. God bless

08-28-2013, 11:44 PM
I'm sorry about your loss. Best wishes and condolences to you and the family.
At least he's no longer suffering.

08-29-2013, 12:24 AM
I lost a similar friend/neighbor who was a few years younger than Tony. Took a few years to get used to it. He was a tough guy but very generous. I believe we will all see him in Heaven along with Tony. Prayers for you brother.

08-29-2013, 12:45 AM
I have no words, other than to say 'I'm sorry.'.........

unclogum bill
08-29-2013, 12:52 AM
Jay, you have my respect. Its hard for a man to talk about things and you did a great job and got it done. Tony is one lucky guy to have a friend such as yourself. Having lost my sister to cancer in February and my favorite cousin this month I got a sense of how it is. If you can , speak at the service, All need to know what a guy Tony was.
When I do I have closed with this pray. Honored if you use it.
Oh mighty God and Heavenly Father
We thank you for providing us with grace and making us in your image
We thank you today for Tony and all the goodness he has showed us in his lifetime.
We ask you to give us strength to carry on with out him
So he need not worry about us, as he walks your kingdom forever with Jesus.
best to you , you the man. Bill

08-29-2013, 01:07 AM
I too have watched as a cousin died at 13 from brain cancer and older friends who were almost larger than life shrivel up. Neither life nor death seems fair. I'm sorry brother! Praying for your family and his.

08-29-2013, 10:54 PM
Sorry to hear of your loss, prayers for you and his family.

08-29-2013, 11:27 PM
Went to funeral home tonight. He is wearing bib overalls and a Hawaiian shirt! Redneck class! :)

08-31-2013, 10:25 PM
Bless you and Tony.


09-01-2013, 06:15 AM
Good morning
Priceless ! We are truely blessed by God being in company of certain individuals.
Mike in Peru