What's the closest you've come to soiling yourself???

[Sweetpea]

Seems there are some pretty good "add your own" threads going around right now, but none of them quite cover this...

I'll start off...

I was a little more than halfway done with a rather large smelt this evening, when I felt two or three sprinkles hit the back of my neck.

I slammed the lid on the pot, turned off the gas, and was headed into the garage to check myself in about .75 seconds...

Pretty sure some foul language was used also...

Brandon

[waksupi]

You have never ate my cooking, or you would not ask this question. At my age, I never trust a fart or waste an erection, even if I'm alone.

[nagantguy]

In a helicopter that broke its rotors off on the stack of a ship and went skipping across the water and came down in a less that "grease" landing.

[MaryB]

Late 70's I was 17 ro18 and riding in a friends Mustang. We were beer cruising a gravel bottom road along the river because the cops never patrolled it. He was doing 80 when we came around a corner and had a road grader 100 feet or so in front of us. We bounced off one of the front tires about a foot. To this day I don't know how he got it slowed down.

[jcobb651]

About 18 or 19 years old driving home down gravel backroads after watching a monster flick. About 1 in the morning...man was I spooked....couldn't get home fast enough....hit a rough patch in the gravel that shook my checkbook out of the sun visor and into my lap...slapping me in the face on the way down. First I said it...then almist did it!

[Swamp Man]

When I was a teen hunting in the pine groves and stepped around a large pine tree and looked down to see a 6 plus foot coiled up rattler between my feet. I was froze in my tracks and couldn't breath for few seconds I knew I was going to get bit. Once the total shock eased I did a back flip and he stuck just missing my right foot. My oldest son has that skin hanging on his living room wall now he always wanted it so when he moved out I gave it to him.

[Bad Water Bill]

At my age it is impossible to remember all of them,lets just saw Hanes has made a good dollar off me.:bigsmyl2:

[runfiverun]

this is one of many.

we had weighed all the baggage and people going into a metal tube twin engine thing they said was an airplane.
after some of crawled about halfway to the back, we loaded the heavy guy's to the front so the thing wouldn't tip over backwards, then finished filling the rest of the tube with bodies.
we took off and headed towards minot north Dakota at the blinding speed of 200 feet up and 300 feet down then 40 feet sideways for the trip from about casper wyoming on up.
we changed itinerary into wiliston ND because we had been pushed off course burned off almost all the fuel and couldn't make the whole trip.
as we turned into the landing strip the lightning started really lighting things up and a tornado was sighted off to the right, accompanied by the attending worsening wind shear pushing us voilently first left then right then finally downwards.
we made a short pass towards the strip when the last one hit us.
the pilot over revved the engines trying to climb back out of the landing, and the co-pilot throttled back as the pilot started fighting the controls and trying to decide which way to go.
we ended up dropping down to Dickinson and going straight in to land in the middle of the tornado sirens blaring there.
we went straight in to approach hit pavement and went directly towards the hanger right across the grass, we coasted [with dead engines] the last 100' or so towards the building.
they didn't have to tell anyone how to depart the plane, we bailed just as the hail started pelting everything in sight.
I have no idea how many little bags were filled from the earlier lunch break
and everybody wanted out NOW.

[Bad Water Bill]

One more Hanes story

June 20.1959

Uss Independence
Gitmo bay.

I worked the night shift 4 PM-8 AM. Discharge date is July one and I am running out of beads on my short timers chain.

Instead of bed I went to personell and asked when do I and how do I get discharged?

When it is your time we will let you know at least two weeks in advance. Now get back to work so we can do our job.

Well a couple loud remarks brought out the duty officer wanting to know what the problem was?

My discharge papers are two weeks late is my problem,I said.

Orders were immediately cut.First flight out to nearest base for discharge.

Bags packed and at the flite line in a flash. Sailor we have a RESERVE flight to Detroit leaving in 30 minutes. Go eat and report back. YIPPEEE Detroit is only a few thumb rides from Chit Kaga.
Cane back to see my ride is a trusty DC-3 Well we got airborn then I found the crew was on a WISKEY RUN. Not bad enough now we are in a real tropical storm. I swear sometimes I looked UP to see the top of the waves. 8 hours later and almost out of gas we landed at NAS Sanford Fl.

Lots of thumb rides to get home from there but that was better than riding with that crew just to the end of the runway.

Only one of ????

[Cosmiceyes]

When I had to take medicine to clean me out for a "colonoscopy"!

[jcwit]

A few years ago I ripped 2 fingers off my left when a board got out of control using a spindle sander, I was attempting to turn off the machine and the board caught me in the palm of my hand taking the 2 fingers with it. During the 45 minute ride to the hospital I had little control of any functions because of the pain. I was fighting cancer at this same time.

[Echo]

I was giving an outside
tour of our museum, on their bus, and near the end when I noticed I had to use the bathroom. A minute later I REALLY had to use the bathroom - so I bailed out after telling the bus driver what to do, and headed for the nearest john. Didn't make it. Emptied the descending, transverse, and ascending colons, and maybe part of the small intestine, too, outside the building with the john. I don't think any visitors were aware of the problem. Maintenance took care of the cleanup, but that was the absolute worst bug attack I ever had. Carrumba...

[KCSO]

About 1971 or so my wife and I were riding the BMW bike at night and I saw something moving across the road ahead of me. I swerved and caught the rear of a medium to large snake and the front end came off the ground and soon I was riding with a really pissed off snake wrapped around my right boot. Thank God it turned out to be only a small, 5-6 foot, bull snake who was unable to chew through my boot before I was able to kick it off. I have since thought a lot about how lucky we were not to be riding further west in the country of the rattlers.

[44fanatic]

I honestly cant remember much of it. My Soldiers were nice enough not to burn my sleeping bag and my uniform. Opening up a trash bag 4 or 5 days later was not a pleasant experience....just about started puking again. Had picked up some bug in Iraq that dang near killed me, no bowel control for 24 hours and a fever in excess of 104. Aint ever drinking the local bottled Pepsi again.

[popper]

Charge by a large, mad, black bull from 15' while chasing cattle off the base after Carla. Didn't soil the britches but still had to wash the dungaree shirt after I blacked out. The rest are gee whiz moments, like jumping down blind terraces on a 250 yamahammer and landing the front forks on a VW muffler. No, I didn't fall off but there was a moment when you see what is in front of you. Or you are napping in the right seat and dad decides to do an air restart without telling you. Darn, we're airborne and the prop isn't moving. Or seeing a 6" chunk of hail hit the windscreen @ 13K' over lake Estes. Or 'get the **** out of there, a Martin 404 is touching down behind you'.
BWB - had the same problem on a transfer, Caught last the U boat while passing Point Loma, else I would have been on the way to Nam.

[Boz330]

Like Bill I have several that come to mind. I started jumping out of airplanes in 64', started flying airplanes in 68', and balloons in 90'. Over the years I had 15 parachute malfunctions, and a number of dead sticks, but the most scared I have ever been was in a hot air balloon where everything seems to go soooo slow. With parachutes and to a lesser extent airplanes everything happens quick and you don't have time to think about it much you just react. In a balloon you have a long time to contemplate your situation.
I was flying one evening in the balloon and had a gal and her son on board. I had, had my license about 6 months and it was a nice evening in Jan with fairly light winds. Sunset was approaching and I shot a landing into a very small field and missed. When I climbed out I was tracking right straight down a 100,000 volt power line and not moving very fast. By this time it was getting pretty dark. The line finally made a turn off to the east and while the line was gone I was still over a lot of trees with no clearings. I could see a big transmission line right of way coming up and there was room to land with no mistakes but I was committed. At this time it was so dark that I could see the transmission towers but not the lines hanging between. Just before I was going to cross the fence on the ROW the balloon turned slightly right and I was passing over the back corner of a house lot. I ripped out the top and dropped into the corner of the yard. I did hit a tree on the descent but did no damage. I did kiss the ground upon exiting the basket.

Bob

[MrWolf]

Had a few but seeing my dead mother-in-law looking at me through a window. I still have the goosebumps every time I think of it including writing this.

[EddieNFL]

When a .30 caliber bullet passed between my left side and arm leaving a hole in my jacket.

[Love Life]

After a 3 day bender (my younger days) we got Taco bell for breakfast. That was the longest ride 10 minute ride of my life.

[km101]

June 1967

Me and a couple of buddies got the bright idea to climb the fire lookout tower with a case of beer and watch the stars. There was no ladder for the first 30', so we each tied a couple of six packs to our belt and climbed the tower to the level of the steps. (this requires both agility and strength) From there on it was easy climbing to the top of the 125' steel tower.

We were sitting on the outside walkway telling lies and drinking beer, throwing the cans off the tower and about to get really drunk (it only takes about a 6 pack at 17) when one of the guys looks behind us and exclaims "Holy S***, what is that?"
Well, THAT was a summer thunderstorm, complete with plenty of lightning! We instantly realized:

A. We are on the tallest structure for miles around and it is steel!
B. We have all consumed enough alcohol that our coordination is no longer good.
C. We have to climb down 90+ feel of steel ladder, and then down the structure of the tower, and it is STARTING TO RAIN!
D. None of us may see our 18th birthday!

It is true that the Lord protects fools and drunks, because we made it down to the ground in record time with only minimal injury! We were sitting in the car, trying to control our trembling when there was a loud bang, a flash of light, and a ball of lightning traveled from the base of the tower to the closest pine tree about 40' away. We left so fast that we forgot to get the rest of the beer from the second case, that was sitting on the ground. My old '51 Dodge never went that fast before or since!

We had two Hanes moments within 5 minutes!

[Dale in Louisiana]

I left 'close' in the rear-view mirror:

Bad Day Tanking (http://mostlycajun.com/wordpress/?p=141)

dale in Louisiana

[jcobb651]

I left 'close' in the rear-view mirror:

Bad Day Tanking (http://mostlycajun.com/wordpress/?p=141)

dale in Louisiana

That one had me chuckling!

[Bad Water Bill]

It is 2 AM on the flight deck. You are head and shoulders under the dash of an A4D Skyhawk changing instruments.

You are alone when you suddenly realize your foot just snagged the EJECTOR curtain. Now I need a BB stacker to de arm the thing before I become several parts floating in the middle of the Med.

HANES TIME

[mroliver77]

Long time ago a friend and I were out making the rounds and getting kinda whooped up. We were on our bikes and started opening them up. Nice country road, good conditions and the bikes were screaming. All at once the road narrowed and I was riding a stone sidetrack at over 100 mph! Bike wanted to fish tail and the only thing to do was give it all it had. My buddy had seen my predicament and backed off. I rode along a short ways and when all was right jumped it back on the pavement. It all happened in a few seconds but it played out slowly in my mind. My butt bit holes in my Hanes that evening!
J

[WILCO]

Some great replies here. One incident that comes to mind was the time I rode my Harley-Davidson off the road while speeding on a very sharp curve. It was a sickening feeling, as I fought to keep the bike on pavement, then fought harder to stay on the gravel roadside and ultimately submitted to leaving the road entirely. As I left the road, I entered a wide-open area of grass that was coated with fresh morning dew. At the end of this area was a long and deep drainage ditch that butted up against a busy main road. I went through the grass like slicked lightning, dragging my left foot in an effort to keep myself upright. The handlebars were turned fully to the right, almost to the point of bending out of sheer terror! The clutch was fully engaged, my right hand with a death grip on the front brake. I remember yelling to myself "Don't dump! Don’t dump!" as I entered the downward side of the ditch at a 45 degree angle, with my right foot firmly planted on the brake pedal and my tail end coming round to greet me. In an almost cartoon like fashion, the bike was suddenly sucked into the mud at the bottom and stopped moving, throwing me towards the upward side of the ditch! Without missing a beat, I extended my right foot outward and caught solid ground, managing to push off back towards my left side. There I was, at the bottom of this deep muddy ditch, scared sh*tless, but elated to be alive and in one undamaged piece. Pulling myself together, I put my right foot back on the footrest and released the clutch to climb out of the ditch. With a lurch and a gasp, the bike stalled!! It was still in fourth gear! I never had time to downshift during the melee. Believe me, the sight of a soiled and muddy WILCO, sitting atop a Harley-Davidson at the bottom of a deep ditch must've been a sight to behold. Did I mention the bike was kick-start only?

[WILCO]

It all happened in a few seconds but it played out slowly in my mind.

That's how it played out for me. Takes even longer to write about it. :)

[Bad Water Bill]

Hitched a ride out of N A S Oceana heading for Chit Kaga on a weekend pass.

Just passed Richmond Va on a 2 lane road,dark as the inside of an OLD miners boot and sleeting like mad.

The driver suddenly decides to pass an 18 wheeler. He pulled a hard left to pass and all I saw was blinding headlites from another 18 wheeler heading right at us less than 50 yards away.

Luck again. The driver slid the car into a closed gas station fishtailing on the sleet, the 18 wheeler SCREEMS at us as he flashes past and we slide back on the highway.

HANES TIME

And I still have over 50 years of HANES TIME to go.:bigsmyl2:

[smokeywolf]

Back in the mid 1970s I was working for a security company as primary response to their alarms. One place that was considered a high priority, high risk target was a rather large medical laboratory that kept a variety of drugs on hand for calibrating testing instruments and setting up control groups. For an addict this place would have been heaven on earth.

Going into the building and conducting a routine search was almost a nightly ritual. The building was single story, probably 10-12,000 sq. ft., with a variety of rooms that segregated the various functions of the lab.

At approximately 3:40 AM I advised dispatch of my whereabouts, unlocked the front door, re-locked it behind me, turned off the alarm and began my search. If you didn't turn off the alarm, every door you opened and every 10 feet or so of your movement would send a long series of signals to the alarm panel in the dispatch office.

I usually conducted a search of the front main room 1st, with particular attention to the two safes that contained the drugs and God knows what else. Then on to an adjacent room, back through the front main room, then straight back to the back of the building room by room. Each room was around 2,000 sq. ft.

I had completed my search and was walking from the far rear of the building toward the front. I had re-entered the front main room and had advanced approximately 20 feet when I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. I slapped the 1911 out of it's holster, slipped my finger into the the trigger guard and snapped down the thumb safety (carried it cocked & locked). Following the millisecond that it took my eyes to focus from rear sight to front sight to target I saw the frightened pale face of the female executive who had come to work 3 hours early because she couldn't sleep and had paper work to do.

She had entered the building, gone to the alarm panel to turn off the alarm circuit that covered the front room, found that it was already off and decided that she didn't need to call the dispatcher to advise that she had entered the building. Had she done that, my dispatcher would have notified me via my walkie-talkie and this would have been a non-event.
A memo was sent out to all employees with door keys and alarm codes the following day, instructing them to call the alarm dispatcher every time they unlocked any perimeter door.

It only takes one experience like this to teach you that the only thing more frightening than coming close to losing your own life is coming close to taking the life of an innocent.

One of my firearms instructors used to say, "Knowing when to shoot comes in second to knowing when not to shoot."

smokeywolf

[texassako]

Painful one would be the time I decided it would be a good idea to run a 4" long board across a jointer. Thumb is still out of whack years later. Several motorized vehicle incidents including my first time high siding a motorcycle(on the track with leathers, so just bruises), figuring out the boost curve of somebody else's high boost turbo car is not something to learn in a wet curve, and the winner would be being told I passed a DPS trooper at 140+ with a fresh nitrous tank in the back. It would have been an actual soiling if it had been the cop and not my friends telling me.

[Harter66]

It's sort of a toss as to which 1 was worse.

I drove a 1959 Ranchero to highschool and a yr and 1/2 after . It was early spring March maybe 1985 . The new in November snow tires gator backed ....at about 70 mph on I 80 just out of Reno. That wouldn't normally be a big deal,but the tire didn't blow and the loose end wasn't going the peel off direction . So there I was 70mph w/and every time the tire came around it grabbed the fender locked the rear end and I skidded about a half a lane width up the turn to the out side and broad side to the following traffic which is now charging on me. I did get it straightened out but 70 to 20 in under 200 ft was a thrill . I think that was probably it.

The 2nd was just a few yr ago. It involved riding w/the kids and keeping up w/the tuned tweeked 450s on my bone stock XR650R . We had been riding some low hills and high angle climbs. Our mid-morning break then off about about a half mile away on nice smooth fresh graded dirt road. The kids ran out ahead and I ''got on it'' to catch up . Well as I leaned into a turn in the top of 3rd gear the back started to come out ,so i backed off and eased out of the turn got it ''hooked'' and laid in to it again where it unhooked again. So I rode it out hopped the minimal grade berm slowed it up some more,dodged a big pile of sagebrush standing on the pegs leaned way back and in to a wash w/vertical walls about 15-18' across and 8' deep . Time lapse 2.5-3.5 seconds. The impact blew 8 spokes out of the front hub and crushed the Baja Light kit . I broke my wrist ,actually knocked the tips off the ulna and both ends radius w/a rasberry across my eyebrows. 4' left was a fairly smooth grade cut ....... yup soiled the Hanes wear.......

[Recluse]

When Obama was elected in 2008, and again in 2012.

:coffee:

[nekshot]

Farming is very hazardous at times. One hot afternoon we were filling the silo's and running day and nite and I was tired, unloading a silage wagon at the silo/blower and the blower auger started to stall because the drive belt was working lose and I like a fool reached in to push down on the belt and the next thing I knew my hand got in between belt and pulley and went around the pulley and every thing went numb (my brotherinlaw lost is arm at the harvester a few years earlier and I had that sick feeling, wanting to soil pant feeling that I just did a very bad thing). Fortunately some skin was missing but every thing was there and I suddenly became a little wiser!

[DanWalker]

2 most memorable were in Kuwait in 1991. The first was driving an abrams through 3 minefields in one night. You could see the damned antitank mines laying where the mine plows had overturned them, on both sides of the lanes we used to traverse.
The second was when I volunteered to clear vehicles and bunkers. I saw things in those holes that haunt me to this day. The one REALLY scary time actually turned out to be pretty funny. Me and a warrant officer I worked for were out clearing(removing unexploded ordinance, disarming booby traps, gathering intel, and doing body counts and disposition) some blown up enemy APC's. He was always telling me,"Slow down!, Be careful!". I was 20 and invincible, so I paid him little mind. I was crawling into the back of BMP, over a stack of AK ammo, still in crates. I had spotted some Iraqi smokes and was making a beeline for them. I felt a tug at my trouser leg, and looked down and saw a "wire". In my greedy haste, I had managed to miss noticing the tripwire i was now snagged on. I froze and called out,"Gunner, I'm on a wire!" Sweat poured, and my heart was hammering. "I didn't want to die like this. Dear God please let it kill me instantly. I don't want to go home with no legs." Gunner came up behind me and was trying to keep us both calm. "Dan, just hold still man. Let me run this. You're gonna be ok. You know I won't let anything happen to you." I was shaking like a leaf and sweating right through my clothes. The most common booby trap we ran into in vehicles was a hand grenade with the pin pulled, stuffed into an empty can. They'd tie a wire to the grenade and tape the can to something, then string the wire out so that when you hit the wire, you pulled the grenade from the can. As i was sitting there, pondering my stupidity, and begging God to either let me live, or take me quickly, the following happened. First, I heard," What the F!?" Then something knocked me over and I was being drug backwards out of the vehicle by my ankle. I squealed like a stuck hog , scared spitless. I landed flat on my back, bouncing my skull off of a rock, and looked up to see the gunner laughing his *** off. He picked me up and dusted me off, then took me over and showed me what had happened. The "wire" was actually from the crates of AK ammo. It comes packed in watertight foil, with a protruding metal ring. You pull the ring, and the wire cuts the foil, opening the case of ammo. Needless to say, I was a LOT more careful after that. I take my hat off to the tunnel rats that came before me. I only did it for a couple weeks. I can't imagine what it must have been like for the guys in Vietnam who did it for months at a time.

[41 mag fan]

Back when I was 16....it was maybe 2min before total darkness, was riding my bike home. Had just passed a semi about 1/2 mi back, and was running about 60. Not 25ft in front of me, I see a VW Rabbit, no brake lights, no turn signal. I remember thinking....oh chit...slammed on the brakes and somehow shifted from 5th gear down to 3rd gear before slamming into them as they were turning.
Hitting them threw me to the left, and I went right between them and another car going by.
I remember saying ....Shane you can kiss your *** goodbye
Got threw the cars, and my forks started wobbling, and down the bike went flipping on top of me and skidding about 40ft.
I remembered...**** I just passed a semi, and hopped up and pulled my bike off the road.
I got VERY VERY lucky. When I went down, I went down on my right elbow, shattered it, ripped the sole off my right shoe, so the only part left was still around my foot.
I wasn't wearing a helmet but no head injuries.
Road rash on my side and back, and my right shoulder was dislocated.

School mate heard the crash 3/4 mi away, came to see what happened. He took me home, after i found out the car I hit had no insurance.
I was already late getting home, and mom was fit to be tied. I got into trouble for being late!!
30 min later I was back into town buying me a pair of shoes from Walmart.
Still must of been in shock, as I didn't hurt, till about 3 hrs later. By then my elbow was the size of a softball. Took 6mo for it to heal up correctly.

Talk about making a butt hole pucker, is thinking you're going to die when you go between to cars after hitting one of them.

[Bad Water Bill]

I think that is definitely a HANES 3 PACK.

[outdoorfan]

Normally you're drinking the pepsi to avoid what happened to you because you drank the local "tap" water. LOL! Okay, that experience isn't funny whatsoever when you're in the moment.



I honestly cant remember much of it. My Soldiers were nice enough not to burn my sleeping bag and my uniform. Opening up a trash bag 4 or 5 days later was not a pleasant experience....just about started puking again. Had picked up some bug in Iraq that dang near killed me, no bowel control for 24 hours and a fever in excess of 104. Aint ever drinking the local bottled Pepsi again.

[outdoorfan]

I would like to see the lady's (and her son) stories of the same event. "This crazy man..."



Like Bill I have several that come to mind. I started jumping out of airplanes in 64', started flying airplanes in 68', and balloons in 90'. Over the years I had 15 parachute malfunctions, and a number of dead sticks, but the most scared I have ever been was in a hot air balloon where everything seems to go soooo slow. With parachutes and to a lesser extent airplanes everything happens quick and you don't have time to think about it much you just react. In a balloon you have a long time to contemplate your situation.
I was flying one evening in the balloon and had a gal and her son on board. I had, had my license about 6 months and it was a nice evening in Jan with fairly light winds. Sunset was approaching and I shot a landing into a very small field and missed. When I climbed out I was tracking right straight down a 100,000 volt power line and not moving very fast. By this time it was getting pretty dark. The line finally made a turn off to the east and while the line was gone I was still over a lot of trees with no clearings. I could see a big transmission line right of way coming up and there was room to land with no mistakes but I was committed. At this time it was so dark that I could see the transmission towers but not the lines hanging between. Just before I was going to cross the fence on the ROW the balloon turned slightly right and I was passing over the back corner of a house lot. I ripped out the top and dropped into the corner of the yard. I did hit a tree on the descent but did no damage. I did kiss the ground upon exiting the basket.

Bob

[Love Life]

DanWalker's story reminded me of a good one...


There I was, larger than life. I was a young (20) year old LCpl patrolling the sort of mean streets of Fallujah, Iraq. We were going through a very tight alley way and even I had to turn sideways (I was 110 lbs at the time). As I was sidestepping through the ally the pin from my frag caught on something...it pulled. Now normally this is not a concern since the thumb clip would hold the spoon down...

Except, being the hard charging Devil Dog that I was at the time, I had removed the thumb clip inorder to get the get the frag into action sooner in case we had to get some!! Dumb move when I look at it now. Anywho, the pin pulls (did I mention that I had straightened one of the legs on the pin?) and I stop. I swear it took me over an hour to look down at the live frag in my pouch and verify the pin had pulled, but the issued grenade pouch held your frags very securely so the spoon did not release (which is why I always use issue frag pouches and not the super loose aftermarket pouches).

Once I verified I was A) an idiot and B) relatively safe I screamed "Cpl Patterson!! I have a problem!!" Cpl Patterson was my squad leader at the time. He walks over breathing fire and brimstone and asks "What is wrong?" I tell him the pin pulled on my frag. "GET AWAY FROM (Name withheld)!!" Talk about feeling alone. He looks around the alley and finds the pin. He gingerly reinserts the pin into my grenade, folds the legs over to secure them, and heads out to regroup the squad.

He said nothing about it the entire patrol. When we got back I spent the next several weeks filling sandbags on my limited free time from post, patrols, QRF, training iraqis, missions ETC.

I seriously almost number oned and twoed in my skivvies.

Good times.

The above is a true story, and the majority of the witnesses are still around today to verify it.

[dagger dog]

Was setting in a leaky eddy on river left just above a drop called "Pigs in Space" on Citico Creek in the Cherokee National Forrest near Tellico Plains Tennessee. It was running about 1100 fps, right after a summer goose drowner.

I was following the moves of an experienced paddler that had run this rapid before, being she was in the lead that meant I was the second kayak into that eddy, the eddy was so small it really wasn't holding my boat that well and I was having to paddle like he** to keep from being blown out the back of the eddy and entering the drop backwards.


So when she peeled out and went over the horizon line, I moved up into the top of the eddy and turned my head to watch the end of her kayak disappear. A few seconds later I saw the vertical blade of a paddle waving on river right about 20 feet below, that paddle wave was a signal to tell me the next safe spot-eddy.

I swallowed hard and turned the kayaks bow into the current leaned down stream and let the flow whiplash me out of the eddy, the edge of the drop was about 20 feet ,maybe 3 seconds , I had time to take one stroke and THERE WAS A LOG, extending across the creek at chest level, you couldn't see it from the eddy, but a quick duck down to the deck of the boat kept me from being clotheslined and drug out of my boat and over the drop I went.

"Pigs is a real squealer" , Monte, 1990. I just happened to be on it that day and once the bow dropped I saw Quami, in the eddy on river right, so a little head turn to the right and the "Purple Pig" that's the name of my boat, dropped into the eddy next to hers.

There were 4 of us that had decided to run Citico Creek that day ,plus 2 extra people with ropes covering the wash out at the bottom of "Pigs". The next two boaters in line ,20 foot out of sight and above Quami and my self entered that leaky eddy and should have seen a horizontal paddle being raised and lowered designating trouble and not to run. The noise of the rapid and the adrenalin rush kept the drilled in safety precautions from being heeded and the 2 other boaters started their runs.

Frank, the 3rd boater was the senior in experience that day and really should have had the lead, but turned it over to Quami because of her having made the run before. Frank was THE BOY SCOUT always prepared, he kept a kit that included an extra 3 part paddle, first aid kit, you name it Frank carried it and all in a Dagger Crossfire kayak.

So when encountering the log at the brink of the drop he was dragged out of his kayak, popping the spray skirt with one hand and keeping hold of his paddle and grab loop on the boat in the other washed over the 20 foot drop out of the boat.

The river gods were with him that day, he washed into the eddy where Quami and I were waiting, coughing and sputtering, pulled his kayak onto a small rock dumped out the water and proceeded to pull out his kit bag. Being prepared for anything,he was going through it to find an anti-fog treatment for his eye glasses, he had to remove a roll of toilet paper to get to the other stuff, all 3 of us were still amping out from the rush, Frank out of his boat, standing there with a roll of TP in one hand.

Quami looked up at him and asked " Did you soil yourself ?"

I darn near did, laughing so hard, I almost missed Johnny the 4th paddler as he came over the drop out of his kayak.

That little creek drops 450 feet in one mile, if you ever get a chance to see it "up" it's a must ,some real great trout fishing and a great camping area, a jewel of the southeast along with the Tellico river,

[rush1886]

1985. Couple of buddies and I had parked one of 'ems mini-van on top of Craigs Pass, in Yellowstone Park, and backpacked in to Shoshone Lake for a long weekend. We went in with full packs and float tubes to boot, and had an absolute ball for 3 days.

The trip from vehicle to lake is in the vicinity of 4 miles, and coming out on the last day, it was pretty darn warm for Yellowstone in July. As we hit the rig, knowing we had a stash of cold brews in there, we drew straws to see who would drive down to Grants Village. We'd planned to overnight there and clean up prior to heading back to town the next day.
While offloading our packs and stowing gear in the van, the two of us with the long straws, knocked back a couple of brews, and began to get a buzz. Short straw had to be happy with ice water.
Short straw decided we needed to hit the road, so he may also have a brew at Grants Village, soon. So, we loaded, pointed the van downhill, and took off. The pass is not terrible, but does have a pretty good 4-5% downgrade for a couple of miles. As we hit the first curve, me and the other longstraw politely requested the driver slow down a bit,, so as not to upset our brews. Short straw has a bit of concerned look on his face, and isn't smiling. He mumbles something about a mushy brake pedal. Fellow longstraw and I instruct him to knock off the chit and drive. He says something like, "No, really, brakes are mushy". Another curve coming up, momentum building, the mini is an automatic, and at least two of us in the rig still think the 3rd is yanking our chains.
We made thru the next curve pretty much on 2 wheels, still downhill and speed still climbing and the next curve iminent. Apparently our chaffeur had never thought about the concept of an "emergency brake" prior to this day. Somehow, in the heat of the moment, with tires squealing, speed building and panic spreading, the passengers managed to convey the emergency brake principle to the driver. Somehow he managed to grasp and employ the principle, and the rest of the drive to Grants Village was reasonbly calm.

Upon arrival at Grant's Village, and inspecting the van, we found a neatly severed brake line on the driver side front wheel, and several porcupine quills stuck into the insulation around the ac lines.

Hanes factor, I'd give it at least a 2.

[JeffinNZ]

Came pretty close Feb 22, 2011 when the big quake took the city out. Can't recommend it.