357maximum
08-28-2007, 10:22 PM
Montana Cowboy!
A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous
pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards
him.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
Sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, 'If I
tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you
give me a calf?'
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, 'Sure, why not?'
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
Connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA Page
on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation System to get
an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite
that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed and the data stored.
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel
Spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives
a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says,
'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.''That's right. Well, I
guess you
can take one of my calves,' says the
Cowboy.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the cowboy says to the young man, 'Hey, if I can tell you exactly
what your business is, will you give me back my calf?'
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, 'Okay, why not?'
You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government', says the cowboy.
'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but how did you guess that?'
'No guessing was required.' answered the cowboy. 'You showed up here
even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter
than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd of
sheep.
Now give me back my dog.
A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous
pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards
him.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
Sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, 'If I
tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you
give me a calf?'
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, 'Sure, why not?'
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
Connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA Page
on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation System to get
an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite
that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed and the data stored.
He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel
Spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives
a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says,
'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.''That's right. Well, I
guess you
can take one of my calves,' says the
Cowboy.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the cowboy says to the young man, 'Hey, if I can tell you exactly
what your business is, will you give me back my calf?'
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, 'Okay, why not?'
You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government', says the cowboy.
'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but how did you guess that?'
'No guessing was required.' answered the cowboy. 'You showed up here
even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter
than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd of
sheep.
Now give me back my dog.