PDA

View Full Version : Get it off your chest or make someone feel better



DCP
04-16-2011, 11:54 AM
I see a need for members who need to get it off their Chest

I see a lot of posts of pride and pain

When someone post a Thread about WWII some from a different war will say some very important things.

On another forum in a PM a young Marine called me a coward. He had just got back from Iraq. He had seen a lot of his buddies die. He felt that Marines were the only ones that could die in combat. He felt if you weren’t a Marine you were a coward. This young Marine gave a lot of detail. Then he was pretty nasty. I begged him to see his Chaplain and sent him my phone #. Told him call me any time. (He hasn’t)

Now I feel better
Who’s next?

Charlie Two Tracks
04-16-2011, 01:42 PM
I don't know. War is nasty and will mess a persons mind up at times. I personally don't know of anyone who experienced it and was not change in some manner. Some people are messed up in their thinking before they go. Who knows. I feel sorry for that guy. A lot of anger and rage in there. The injuries of war are not always physical. IMO Some people also use that as an excuse to act incorrectly. Hard to tell.

nighthunter
04-16-2011, 01:49 PM
The military has 5 branches of service because the military needs all 5 branches of the service. Each branch has its strengths and disciplines developed and honed to provide particular services. Am I to believe myself to be better or less than someone else because we served in different branches of the military? I think not. I served my country. Deep down all service men and women are VETERANS. Whether or not they were called upon to place thier lives into jeporady was just the luck of the draw. All men and women who serve in the military are volunteering to put thier life on the line. Even with our problems we still have the best country in the world.
If you can read this ... thank a teacher. If you can read this in english ... thank a veteran.

Nighthunter

Jim
04-16-2011, 01:54 PM
Nighthunter, thank you, Sir, for defending my freedom.

starbits
04-16-2011, 02:01 PM
He felt that Marines were the only ones that could die in combat. He felt if you weren’t a Marine you were a coward. This young Marine gave a lot of detail. Then he was pretty nasty. I begged him to see his Chaplain and sent him my phone #. Told him call me any time. (He hasn’t)

DCP you need to take another step. If he didn't ID himself the forum you were on should be able to ID him. Take that information and a copy of the PM and take it to a military chaplain yourself and tell them you are concerned this guy is going to go off on himself or somebody else. The chaplain will make sure the info gets where it needs to go.

Starbits.

lbaize3
04-16-2011, 03:25 PM
DCP you have already done what you should have done. You let the man vent his feelings. I served on Swift Boats in Vietnam, 1967-68. Made it through the 68 Tet Offensive. Came home with very mixed and strange feelings to a country that did not support or care about what I did. I was no draftee, like the Marine, I was a volunteer. I love my country and wanted to be of service. Saw friends die and participated in lot of gut-tightening events, the least of which was the combat. I am now a 100% disabled veteran, primarily because of the Agent Orange that gave me diabetes and PTSD. I have been able to cope with this over the years because of people like you that allowed me to discuss my feelings about my service.

Because you can not be sure of the young marine's identity or the fact that he is in fact a marine veteran, I suggest that you simply let the subject drop. You have already done the right thing. If this person is a marine veteran, he will seek the companionship of other veterans and will soon see the error of his feelings. I can relate to how he feels... what with the number of Americans going to Canada to avoid the draft. But I no longer harbor ill feelings toward those people. In some cases I admire their feelings and resolve to avoid participation in what they felt was an unjust war. And to be perfectly honest, if they felt that way, I did not want them backing me up...

smoked turkey
04-17-2011, 02:17 PM
Ibaize3:
Thank you sir for your self sacrificing service to me and our country. I am truly sorry that our country did you and all those coming back from that war did you such a disservice by making you feel that you shouldn't have been involved in Vietnam. The fact that you have to live with both physical and emotional things as a result is tragic. I have regrets in my life from things I did or did not do. One of the biggest is the fact that I didn't choose to go to the military. I am ashamed in some ways that I didn't go. It was voluntary during my time and I chose another path. Though not one of rebellion because I am a defender of the Red, White, and Blue. I believe because of your service and those like you that served our nation in that way that we have the freedoms we now enjoy and some take for granted. My dad was 100% disabled from WWII from serving in the Army in the Aleuitian Islands during some heavy conflict there. So I have seen first hand some of the ravages of war. To that end I stand and salute those currently or in the past that have defended this great country.

jcwit
04-17-2011, 03:14 PM
I served during the height of V/N. The branch I served in decided to place me at The Pentagon. I was called "and worse" all sorts of unfrieldly names. Am I a coward? I think not. I wore my uniform with pride.

The cowards were the ones I met going to and from my vehicle to my office.

That Marine needs help, to say the least! He should be proud of his service and ALL those who have and do serve, no matter what the branch!

462
04-17-2011, 05:23 PM
Smoked Turkey,
There is no need for you to regret or feel ashamed for not enlisting in the military. I suspect that if you had to do it over, you'd make a different decision.

As a voluntary Viet Nam veteran ('68-'69) the ones I begrudge are those who burned their draft cards and/or ran off to Canada with their tails between their legs, those who lie/lied about being a war veteran to further their careers, and the John Kerry types.

82nd airborne
04-17-2011, 05:23 PM
Generally, and Im not accusing this young marine, the guys from our generation that blow up on people saying they saw such horrible things, generally played video games the entire time without seeing combat. This has been my experience thus far. Most that see actual combat dont act like that, they know better. And I definatly would not EVER use my dead brothers just to win an argument. If I had a guess, about 3% of troops who have been to Iraq, have actually seen combat, about 97% act like they have.

Freightman
04-17-2011, 05:44 PM
I went to the Dr. office and a man with a DAV hat came in and sit beside me, this was a old man and I ask " what branch of the service did you serve in? His answer was Army at Bataan 1941- and Korea and Vietnam, I thanked him and his answer was don't thank me thank the ones I left at Bataan, and Korea and in Vietnam, he said I have had a life they didn't. If you do not know your history he went through the "Death March" and 1942 till 1945 in a hell hole. Yet he says he didn't do anything but his duty.. War effects men in different ways and there minds and there attitude. You did good you listened.

Recluse
04-17-2011, 05:48 PM
I would question whether or not this guy was even actually a Marine, let alone how much combat he saw.

The Marines saved my butt once when I got stupid and in way over my head--and they took some risks doing it. But not one of them called me a coward or made disparaging remarks because I was Air Force and not Marines.

The thing about veterans is that we can joke amongst ourselves about being squids and zoomies and flyboys and leathernecks or jarheads or grunts or puddle-jumpers. But we earned that privilege through the comradeship we fostered among ourselves.

In other words, we look out for each other. We may not always agree, but it seems very strange to me for a young Marine who just came back from Iraq to wail away at another vet and call him a coward simply because he wasn't a Marine.

I've known Marines who were extremely glad to see an Air Force C-130 landing on a makeshift road in order to load up the platoon and get them the hell out of there. Or when an AC-130, such as Puff, delivered hellacious cover fire to help a Marine platoon gain an edge or buy some time.

Likewise, I've known some Air Force pilots who could've kissed some Navy combat swimmers full on the mouth when said swimmers pulled the pilots out of the ocean after having been shot down.

Likewise, Army Rangers have rescued more than their fair share of other service members in bad situations over the years, as have Marines.

I didn't hear of any Rangers or Delta guys in Somalia calling the Air Force pararascuemen that saved their bacon "cowards."

And the Coast Guard? Those are THE bravest SOBs I have ever met in my life. Their enemy is almost ALWAYS Mother Nature and Mama always has the upper hand. Some of the old Coasties I know tell me their motto used to be, "You have to go out; you don't have to come back" in reference to their rescue missions.

There is an esprit de corps among veterans that was earned through having the courage to leave home, put on a uniform, and do what we could do to protect the Constitution, our Nation and our way of life.

I might have a hard time with this alleged young Marine calling me, or any other veteran, a coward simply because we were not Marines. I've never heard that from a Marine before as long as I've been alive, which is why it strikes me as odd.

:coffee:

Armorer
04-17-2011, 05:55 PM
Well said Recluse. I couldn't agree more.

Armorer

Echo
04-17-2011, 09:44 PM
+1, Recluse. I was USAF, and a pure REMF (Comm), but we all served. I served with a Death March survivor - Bob Phillips had some stories to tell, but he was more interested in doing his job than relating stories for that episode in his life. I have worked with Special Forces veterans - as a matter of fact, ran into a shooting chum yesterday (and today) at the Gun Show who retired as an LC from the Marines - more metal in his body than some toasters. Russ looks like Death Warmed Over, but is Forked End Down, and not looking for any pats on the back. And He has some stories to tell. Love him - hope he outlasts me, but doubt it. And he doesn't call me a coward...

Lloyd Smale
04-18-2011, 07:00 AM
very well said recluse. sometimes we tend to think our role was more important because thats all we really know about.

klcarroll
04-18-2011, 08:21 AM
I think that Starbits touched on an important point: …..It is essential to all of us that there be an established format and procedure for “reaching out” to people who seem to be “over-burdened”.

The painfully common remark heard AFTER a major tragedy is; “Yeah, ……everyone knew that he had “Issues”, but he was a “loner”, and didn’t talk to people very much.”

We don’t need any more “Columbines” and “Virginia Techs”! …..Every time an unstable person picks up a gun, it is a disaster for the victims and their families, and a HUGE setback for those of us who support the right to bear arms!…..There just has to be a way to bring disturbed individuals to the attention of people who can intervene.

Unfortunately, I can foresee endless problems in accomplishing this goal without serious Constitutional and privacy problems. As bad as the consequences of an unstable person with a gun are, …..I have no desire to see a scenario where ANYONE can be accused of being unstable without just cause, either!

…..Any thoughts from the members of the Law Enforcement Community here???

Kent

nicholst55
04-18-2011, 11:36 AM
I'm inclined to agree that this supposed 'Marine' was a 13-yr old video gamer posing as something he thinks he wants to be. I've never met a Marine who called anyone from another service a coward, and I've known more than a few. They might make jokes about them being a doggie or a zoomie, but never a coward.

As stated above, we're all brothers and sisters-in-arms, regardless of what branch we served in. Some had to dodge bullets and others didn't; that's just the way things are and everybody understands that. We may tease each other about it, but let an outsider try to start something with a comrade and he'll likely have to fight two.

As far as PTSD and other mental ailments wreaking havoc, its only too true. I read reports of attempted suicides nearly every day, and there are relatively few soldiers in Korea! Army-wide, there were eight suspected suicides in March just for the active component; the Reserves and NG had another eight. Lord knows how many attempted suicides there were.

If any of you know or work with veterans or servicemen and they start exhibiting signs of depression, DO SOMETHING! They're killing themselves at an alarming rate!

starbits
04-18-2011, 04:41 PM
I am inclined to agree with Recluse, but if the guy really is a marine he has come pretty far off the bubble and needs help. Only a follow up will tell for sure.

Starbits

GOPHER SLAYER
04-18-2011, 05:48 PM
Several years ago I was sitting in the waiting room of a medical facility. I noticed the older man sitting to me had a huge black eye. I asked him if his wife did it. He laughed and told me he got it when he dove out of bed to take on a Japanese soldier in hand to hand combat when he was on Siapan. He said he had fired all his ammo and all he had to fight with was his knife. He said he had been having the same dream since WWII. He said his wife would not sleep in the same room with him. He went on to tell me that he trys to put padding on any thing he might land on but this time he hit the bed post at the foot of the bed. I wanted to ask more questions but he was called into the doctors office and I never saw him again.

Idaho Sharpshooter
04-18-2011, 06:07 PM
PTSD is a different entity for each of us.

Sharing it with others who have "Been there, done that" is the best way to come to grips.

Rich
I know